Wonders of Wonders

2012-02-12T22:29:00.000-08:00

I can't believe my baby is one! Event though she's a toddler now, she'll always be my baby (and I will never put her in a corner except when she needs a time out).

At her 6 month appointment, she was 18 lbs 50z, 28", with a head circumference of 44 cm, which was in the 90th, 97th, and 75th percentiles. At her 9 month appointment, she was 97th for height and 90th for head circumference, but only 50 - 75th for weight (19 lbs 11 oz, 29.25" and 45.5 cm). The Ped said that she should probably gain some weight to be more proportioned. So I had a goal of fattening her up. I didn't know what to feed her since she didn't like yogurt and wasn't really into eating meat. I just started letting her eat, and she just kept on eating more and more puree, never really refusing. She ate a lot! More than Max did at that age. I slowly started adding more and more ground meat to her purees and some cottage cheese and she didn't mind it. Then the breakthrough...I gave her some freeze dried yogurt snacks and she gobbled them up. So I started mixing banana and cereal in into 2 ounces of yogurt and she took it. Eventually, she started to eat straight yogurt and it was such a relief. She was also not as enthusiastic about finger foods, as Max was. Max loved going to Fresh Choice and would love veggies and plain pasta. Avery didn't really like finger foods until recently, which is ok by me. It was hard to satisfy Max when he started refusing purees. At her one year appointment, she was in the same percentiles (21 lbs 6 oz, 30.75 in, and 47.5 cm). The Ped said that she'll probably remain in the same percentiles since she's burning so many calories by crawling and not much finger foods actually make it into the mouth.

At 8 months, Avery was able to pull her self across the floor, sort of swimming along. At 9 months, she was crawling with her belly off the floor and able to pull herself up to stand. At 10 months, she was cruising along. She can clap her hands on command, but we're still working on waving bye bye and signing. She's starting to sign "more" since she always wants more food! She says Mama and Baba, but we're not sure if she means it or not. One day Hubby was feeding her dinner and she wasn't too happy with how he was feeding her and she looked at me across the table and yelled "MAAMAAAA," so maybe she does mean it.Her two bottom teeth popped out at 8 months. Then her two top teeth and then her top incisors and now one bottom tooth is popping out. We can tell that teeth are coming because she drools nonstop right before they cut through. She'll go through two or three bibs a day.

Avery is such a good sleeper! She'll sleep about 11 hours without waking from about 9 pm to 8 am now that I'm not working. She'll cry during the night, maybe once every two or three weeks or if she's teething, but she usually goes back to sleep on her own. She takes two naps now. A good nap will last 1.5 hours. I rock her to sleep and then put her down after she's been sleeping for a couple of minutes. She's usually too sleepy at that point to wake up fully. So different than Max at this age. She won't sleep easily in the stroller or car though, which is okay since we're usually at home.

We are usually at home because Avery, however, is not so easy going as Max was at this age. Avery still screams a lot. Although, she's toned it down a bit just recently. She'll emit such a high pitched, ear piercing scream that totally startles, everyone around her. She'll scream when she's happy, when she's angry, when she's hungry, when she's bored, or when she wants something. She'll scream even if I'm holding her. It makes it hard to take her to public places, especially restaurants and markets. She definitely prefers a cart to a stroller because she'll scream no matter where we are if she's in her stroller for awhile. I can't wait for her to start signing and talking so that she'll try to get our attention in other ways than screaming.

Again, there are a lot of positives about being with Avery and not working. Just not having to drop her off and pick her up everyday is such a relief. I don't need to pump and make bottles, which makes life so much easier. I make most of Avery's purees, and of course, just spending so much time with her is really a gift that I didn't have with Max.

Max was in the 75th percentile for height and 50 - 75th percentile for weight at his 4 year appointment. He has such great personality. He's really outgoing and friendly, both great traits to have. He says he's shy, but he'll chat it up with anyone (which makes teaching about stranger danger particularly challenging). He loves to sing and dance and is quite the performer.

Max has exited the terrible three's, yay! What was so frustrating about that age was that we would think that he was so mature because he could express himself, but he lacked the ability to reason and remember what we told him not to do. Whenever we asked him why he did something, he'd say he didn't know. How he can explain why he did something, but he still won't remember to do certain things like leaving toys on chairs (since I don't see them if I'm holding Avery and I end up sitting on them).

2012-01-13T22:22:00.000-08:00

So I haven't posted in awhile. I've been meaning too, but lately Avery has been wearing me out and usually I just watch tv to relax at night or catch up on some housework. I feel bad because I haven't been keeping up with Avery's developments (and Max's). I'll try to catch up now.

First things first. So the biggest thing that happened since I last blogged was I got laid off. I wasn't too surprised when it happened, but it was still a shock. Five years of dedication and it all ends suddenly one day. I was very bitter, especially how it happened, which was very cold and brutal for everyone who got laid off that day. It was very upsetting on many levels, but I'm most upset that the perfect job for me was taken away due to nonsensical decisions stemming from corporate greed. (Also upsetting is that I felt a sense of entitlement for the first time, something I loathe.) I was so excited to be in my new position. I really liked my co-workers and my boss. I was going to learn about a whole new field. I got a great raise and made 5 times as much as what I was offered with my first job out of school. I still loved working in the industry I was in. For the first time, I felt validated. All the hard work had paid off and I was very humbled by the outcome. Alas, it was too good to be true and I don't think I'll ever be able to duplicate what I had. And then came the realities of being laid off for the first time. I was so revved up for the new position that all I wanted to do was find a new job immediately. I also felt like I needed to keep providing for my family. I've been laid off for three months now and haven't had much luck finding something. Now that the holidays are over, things are picking up and I'm becoming more optimistic. Being laid off and getting turned down from jobs really does a number on your self esteem though. It's not easy trying to get over what happened. I guess I won't until I get a new job.

There is a bright side though to all of this. I get to spend more time with Avery. I only worked 4 months during 2011, three of which after Avery was born. It's been great being with her and watching her grow through her infancy (I'd much rather stay at home now than go back to work.) It's so much tougher taking care of her these days compared to when she was a couple of months old. She's mobile now and not content just lying in a baby gym. She demands much more attention and is very mobile. I didn't experience this with Max since I was working. I also get to spend more time with my family. Hubby had all of December off and it was really nice to hang out with him and reconnect in a way. I get to spend more time with Max when he isn't in preschool. I spend a lot of time at my parents house these days since my mom watches Avery when I'm job searching. I feel like this quality time is a gift and I'm trying to enjoy it as much as possible while it lasts.

Ok, glad I finally got that off my chest. I'll need to catch up on the kids' development next.

2011-07-23T23:49:00.001-07:00

Avery (a.k.a. Meatball, Lady Tubbington, Green Giant - due to a green dress she wore one day) rolled for the first time today! Yay! She did a huge push up and then kinda fell over. She loves to roll onto her side and has been doing that for awhile though, sometimes even getting stuck. She rolled at about the same age as her brother did. They both probably had a hard time due to all the chubs.

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2011-06-17T18:40:00.001-07:00

At Avery's 4 month appointment, she was 16 lbs 8 oz, 25.5 inches long, with 41.7 cm for head circumference, which the upper 90's for weight, 90 for height and 75th for head circumference. Still impressive. I would have been very surprised again if she was off the charts. Hubby was surprised that she has a smallish head, hehe.

I'm now on my last week of leave and not looking forward to going back to work. I had such a hard transition after going back the last time. It was such a shock to all of the sudden be at work away from my baby. I also had a hard time accepting the fact that I couldn't do as many things around the house anymore. At least I know what to expect now when I go back...somewhat. I decided to accept a new position at work with a new boss. I couldn't turn down this opportunity a second time since I essentially had the same offer when I went on leave last time, but I turned it down because I had no idea what life would be like working with a baby. I'll have more stress and longer hours, but I try not too stress out about it now. I just have to remember to go with the flow and we'll survive.

One thing that does stress me out is that Avery still rejects formula. We've tried a couple of different ones and she's just not into the taste. Hopefully I'll be able to pump enough when I'm at work. I didn't with Max so he ate formula every couple of days. Looking back, I can't believe the level of effort I put forth, pumping 3 - 4 times a day and washing so many bottles and pump parts. I'm hoping to start solids soon so that she won't need as much milk. (Her Ped said it's ok even though she's in the 90's. The Ped said Max didn't need solids until 6 months.)

I've enjoyed the last couple of weeks of leave. I've been able to keep the house, cook, and take care of Avery and even went walking everyday. (One more pound left to loose. Yay!) Avery has found her voice now. At about time of my birthday, Avery started to scream and screech, especially when she's tired. It's almost ear shattering sometimes. When she's not screaming, she's very pleasant and easy. I don't know why she's not as chill as before, but the one thing we've learned is that babies are always changing! Would you rather have a very easy going baby that didn't sleep well like Max, or a somewhat fussy baby that can sleep 12 hours at night? In terms of development, she's laughing more and able to sit up supported. She's really strong and she's about to roll once she figures out how to get her arm out of the way. She also says "mmmm muh," which is so cute, and loves playing with her feet with her hands when bringing them straight up in the air when lying on her back.

Max loves Avery and he's very entertaining to her. He knows how to make her laugh and she's more calm around him. Max loves to dance and sing and when he gets going, Avery kicks her legs and dances too.

I think 3 years is an odd age. Max is very articulate and can express himself well, and because of this, we forget he's only 3 years old and doesn't have the ability to reason or remember. It's quite frustrating telling him over and over again not to do certain things. I feel like we're yelling at him all the time, which makes me feel bad. There are certain things though that really push our buttons, which he shouldn't be doing, and if he disobeys me right after I tell him not to do something, he gets punished. I noticed though that if we threaten to punish him, he sometimes just talks back and isn't fearful, which doesn't make punishment very effective, or at least the threat. Once he gets punished, it's a flood of tears. At least we're out of the terrible two's though.

2011-05-29T00:31:00.001-07:00

Avery started laughing right before she turned 3 months old, which is pretty young to do so. Before that, she laughed as she was falling asleep, but Hubby got her to laugh one day by rocking her and making smiley faces. A couple of days later, I got her to laugh by sitting her on my belly as she leaned against my legs while I was lying back in bed. I started laughing as she was facing me, so she would see me and bounce up and down. It's so cute!

Avery is drooling like crazy now! I think she might be teething soon. I really don't want her to grow teeth soon. Ouch!

I love it when I unwrap Avery from her swaddle in the morning and she smiles at me as she instantly stretches her arms up next to her head.

Max started a weekly soccer class. I felt so proud of him as we watched. The kids get water breaks and he comes running over to me and Hubby for his water bottle and we send him back on his way. All you want to say is "Go get 'em tiger!" even though it's a bunch of 3 year olds that can't kick the ball in the right direction. Max still needs to understand that he can't use his hands. He'll pick up the ball and place it right in front of the goal and then kick it in. I've also officially become a soccer mom, complete with minivan!

Today is my 34th birthday! I can't say that I'm ecstatic about officially being in my mid 30's, but I'm ok with it. I still feel young at heart :)

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2011-04-28T10:31:00.000-07:00

I've been wanting to blog for awhile now, but haven't had the chance to and I've been trying to remember everything I want to write. This will probably be a rambling and disjointed post (well, more so than others). I seem to have more responsibilities now than when I was on maternity leave with Max, which means less free time. Not to mention I had to do our taxes and I was sick with a cold. I'm going to try to squeeze in some paragraphs during naps though.

When Max was a baby, I always called him Little One when I talked to him, like when I greeted him in the morning when he woke up. I stopped calling him LO when he wasn't so little anymore. It was just odd for me to call a little newborn Max, so LO stuck. With Avery, I called her Baby and it also stuck (this from I girl who named her stuffed animal panda, Panda.) Baby is not just literal though because Avery is a girl and the baby in our family. I keep getting reminded of Dirty Dancing. "Nobody puts Baby in a corner!"

At her 1 month ped appointment, she was already 11 lbs 6 oz and 23 inches, which was in the high 90's for percentile. She was growing at a faster rate than Max was. At her 2 month appointment, she was 23.5 inches, which is 90th percentile for height and 14 lbs - off the charts for weight. She was in the 75th percentile for head circumference. I couldn't ever imagine that I'd have a child off the charts for anything! She started wearing her 3 month clothes at 2 months. I wonder if her growth rate will keep up.

We had red egg and ginger party for Avery. It was great to see all of our friends and family, especially since we didn't have a lot of visitors prior. I was really excited for Max though because he was going to see all of his friends and family all in one place. I wasn't with him much during the party because I was with Avery. He was quite the social butterfly, I heard. He went to all of the tables and chatted with everyone. Avery had slept some of the time, but she got hungry. We tried to feed her some formula, but she rejected it and I breastfed for the first time in public. (Why I didn't buy a cover up before, I don't know. I still feel awkward doing it in public. I just usually go to the van if she gets hungry. The mini-van must be the most expensive breastfeeding aid ever, but it's so easy just to go to the back seat and hang out there until she's done, unless it's hot.) It was also great to catch up with H.J., who I hadn't seen in two years. I met 18 month old Z. for the first time. She's such a cutie! Old roomie also visited earlier in the week and came to the party. I loved meeting A. (also at cutie!) and seeing R. again. My bro also came from Dubai and took Max to the aviation museum with my mom, so it was some good QT with his uncle.

We were all so tired from the party that we all took a nap when we got home. It's great when the stars align and we can get both kids sleeping at the same time, and even better if Hubby and I sleep as well. We all slept in our bedroom during that first family nap. I had closed the upstairs gate so that Pocky couldn't come into our room and wake us up, but she fell asleep too at the top stair behind the gate.

I caught a cold when Avery was 8.5 weeks old. I decided it was time to move Avery to her crib in her room/office so she wouldn't get sick. It was sad for me, but it was for the best, especially when she slept almost 10 hours the first night! I couldn't believe it. The night before her red egg party, she slept through the night for the first time at 6 weeks and slept 6 hours and 45 minutes and had continued with about 6 hours each night. She'd usually wake up around 6 and I'd feed her and try to go back to sleep, only to be wakened up by Max around 7. Once we moved her, she slept anywhere from 8 - 11 hours. Maybe she woke up because she heard Hubby and Pocky snoring, heh. She's sleeping more than Max did at this age. We're very lucky parents, again. Now we have to adjust her bedtime because she falls asleep around 11 am and doesn't wake up unitl after 10 am, which we can't have when I go back to work. She can also take 2+ hour naps if she's swaddled or if she's in her carseat, but her naps are short if she's not confined and gets startled.

When Avery is hungry early in the morning, it is so cute, although it breaks my heart. I go to her and find that she's broken out of her swaddle. She sucks on one hand vigorously while the other hand is grabbing her ear and her eyes are wide open. It's as if she's saying "Someone...suck suck...PLEASE....feed me... suck suck suck"

It's hard not to compare Avery to Max. They are really similar though. Both are big kids, sleep well, and have good appetites. I kept the paper log of all of Max's feedings and night time sleep. I now record all of that for Avery on phone. (Breastfeeding? There's an app for that. Haha). Avery is growing at a faster rate than Max did, maybe because she eats 6 times a day now and sleeps longer and Max ate 5 times a day. One big difference is that we used to give Max a bottle right before bed to fill him up and I'd pump at the same time. I didn't want to do that with Avery because I loathe pumping, so I always give her a dream feed right before she goes to bed for the night no matter when her last feeding was. If she doesn't eat well, she definitely wakes up earlier the next day. I must say thought that pumping is a lot better now that I have a hands free pumping bra (why I didn't get this the first time, I don't know!). In terms of behavior and development, both kids were pretty easy going, usually only crying when hungry or tired. However, Avery spits up a lot and sometimes gets upset because of it. I asked at her ped appointment if she could have reflux and the ped said that all babies have reflux, but medication is only prescribed when the baby isn't gaining enough weight. Well, that wasn't definitely not the case for Avery. She spits up after almost every feeding though. Avery started smiling and noticing her hands a little later than Max did. She likes batting the toys in her baby gym and can be entertained by it now for awhile.

It's so cute when she falls asleep in your arms. She'll grin and her eyelids get heavier and she'll even laugh. She will also smile right after she finishes eating, which is so funny. She really likes to eat and sleep.

At my 6 week appointment with my OB, I only had 11 more pounds to loose! (I just weighed myself and now I only have 4 lbs to lose! It took me 8 months to loose all of Max's baby weight. Sheesh.) She said that I was healing fine except she said that I had the go ahead to do ab exercises after 12 weeks. I don't remember this restriction being so long before, but she said it was necessary to avoid a hernia. I can't wait to hit the gym again and pick up where I had left off before becoming pregnant. I did get the green light to start lifting things like lifting heavy laundry baskets. I eased into things and eventually started lifting Max again. Although, I didn't start carrying him in my arms until recently and I was surprised at how heavy he's gotten. He's around 36 lbs now.

Hubby and I celebrated our 6th wedding anniversary. Coincidentally, my company had a party to celebrate an important milestone on Treasure Island in SF on the same day and offered free hotel rooms to employees (at the W or Intercontinental!). We couldn't pass up the opportunity to have a date night and a free room, even though we didn't stay overnight. My mom graciously volunteered to watch Avery and Max spent the night at Hubby's parents house. Hubby and I were able to get a room at Intercontinental, so we got ready at the hotel. I put myself together as best I could with a 7 week old and then went to the party and only stayed about an hour, just enough time to eat and say hi to some coworkers that were surprised that we were there. It was nice to take a break and leave the 5 mile radius from our house that I had stuck to.

Avery doesn't like the bottle much. She makes this weird face and just chews on the nipple and spits out the milk until she realizes that it's breast milk. She fully rejects formula. Had I known this, I would have given her some formula every once and awhile just so she could get used to the taste. I was freaking out about her rejecting a bottle to, but she will take it when she's really hungry and we give her a bottle every couple of days. I will try to get her eat some formula though in case I can't satisfy her demand once I go back to work. Max never had this problem since we gave him a bottle every night and supplemented with formula until I was able to meet his demand. I burned my freezer stash pretty quickly once I went back to work with Max and he ended up a couple feedings of formula each week until I stopped breastfeeding when he turned one.

Max loves Avery. Sometimes he'll get annoyed if she's crying. I tell him to tell Avery to stop crying to sooth her and all he'll say is "Avery, stop crying!" I'll never forget one of the cutest moments between them so far. We were putting Max to bed and Avery was fussy and was making the frowny face. Max kissed her goodnight and she was totally surprised by it and snapped out of it. Haha. He loves showing her off. When I pick him up from school I bring Avery into the classroom and he'll tell the other kids, "Come, come. I want to show you my baby sister." He wants to help out too. When she first came home, he wanted to feed her bottles but I had to explain to him that her milk comes from me. He's a very good diaper fetcher though. He'll share his toys with her and will give her the baby toys to play with. He's a great big brother.

Part Three: Brining Home Baby

2011-03-08T13:58:00.000-08:00

It was strange to be home from the hospital in such calmness, since the experience was so chaotic with Max. Max had gone to preschool that day and he was really happy that we were home for good. I was really happy that my whole family was under one roof.

The first night home was rough again since Avery stayed up during the night again. I was up at around 4 am and had started crying because I was tired and I had just read on my discharge orders that I may cry for no reason due to hormones. That little phrase triggered a flood of tears, but that was the only time I cried while at home, whereas I cried for a week and a half after we brought Max home due to what happened with him. I remember during the lowest of lows last time thinking, “Why would anyone choose to have kids? I don't think I could do this again.” I didn't have any thoughts like that this time around. Contrary, I thought that my experience with Avery wasn't so bad and thought this is how it should have been.

I also had developed clogged milk ducts in my arm pits that night, but this time since I knew what they were, I didn't go to see a surgeon, which took up so much time before. They eventually went away after two weeks and I haven't developed any since. Hopefully it stays that way.

Surprisingly, I was still in pain. I couldn't even sleep on my side even though ironically I was sick of sleeping on my back in the hospital. (I love my bobby pillow! I used it until the pain subsided) I continued to take vicodin for a week and made myself wean off of it. I continued to take ibuprofen for over a week. Finally the pain subsided, but I still feel a tinge of pain around the incision site after I shower. (I couldn't stop taking showers. They feel so good and is my only me time, which I cherish.)

The rest of the nights during the first and second weeks were the same. The ped said that it takes about two weeks for newborns to get their nights and day straight, and it did take Avery two weeks. It was tiring being up at night, but nowhere near as tiring as the feed then pump routing we did with Max to build up my milk supply. It was hard though being up twice a night and finally getting to sleep right before the sun came up and then Max waking up around 7:00. I remember one night I was falling asleep in the recliner as she was nursing and she flailed her arm and smacked my glasses off my face. I thought that was funny. Hubby isn't so great at waking up in the middle of the night. He sometimes can't even hear Avery cry even though she's sleeping in our room. So we went from both of us being up, to taking shifts, to just me being up. Hubby though was a big help running the household. My mom was a big help too. She came over each morning to get Max fed and ready for school so that we can sleep in and she also brought my food for the day. During the weekends, my mom picked up Max and spent the day with him. This allowed Hubby and me to take naps. It was great, but artificial since Max wasn't around. Max making noise and being his 3 year old self actually helped Avery because when he was home Max would make noise during the day which prevented Avery from sleeping as much.

Max was curious about Avery and wanted to help out. He kept asking if he could feed her a bottle and I had to explain that Avery gets her milk from me now. He had never showed any resentment or jealousy, yet. I felt bad for displacing Max since he wasn't home much, but he didn't mind. He was having fun with the grandparents or at school. His behavior did change though because spending all that time with the grandparents meant that he wasn't being disciplined. He was super whiny whenever he was home and it drove Hubby and me crazy. I felt like we were always yelling at him. If you had a choice between being in an environment where you can do whatever and get away with it versus an environment where you hear no all the time, which would you rather be in? We also noticed that he gained some weight, probably because the grandparents still help him eat by feeding him spoonfuls. However, his Chinese did improve and he pretty much understands everything his grandparents say.

We noticed during the first week home that Avery was making a lot of noise while sleeping, more than the usual grunting noises. We went to the ped for a weight check during the week and her weight was great. 8 lbs 1 oz. We asked about the noisy breathing and the ped said that it could be reflux, so she recommended propping her up after each feeding and propping her crib up, so we did and it seemed to help.

At my 2 week check up with the OB, my weight had dropped 18.5 lbs. Yay! We brought Avery to the appointment and took a picture with the OB since we always see pictures of her other patients with their newborns. We didn't have a chance in the hospital since her father has made the rounds. The OB also noticed how dark Avery was and asked if she was jaundiced, which she was. It hadn't occurred to me that Avery was so much darker than she was when she was first born. I also had forgotten how dark Max was due to jaundice during the first two months.

At Avery's two week appointment, her weight was 9 lbs 6 oz! Not only did she reach her birth weight, she surpassed it by almost a pound! That was reassuring because it showed that breastfeeding was going well and I was able to satisfy her appetite and sustain her growth. I understand everyone's concern, but it drove me crazy when my mom and others would constantly ask whether she's getting enough milk and she looks hungry. My mom's generation wasn't educated about how breastfeeding works, especially how milk doesn't come in immediately, so for two weeks I kept hearing that Avery's hungry and she's not getting enough. That really undermined my confidence. We fed Avery a few bottles during week 4 to get her used to bottles and I actually pumped 4 – 5 oz, which is how much she drank out of the bottle. I was only pumping 3 oz at this point with Max. We also discussed the noisy breathing with her regular ped (the earlier appointment was with another ped) and she said it may have been congestion. I had recorded the sound and played it for the ped. Avery hadn't made the same type of noises though during the days before the appointment.

During week 4, we noticed that she was really gassy and fussy and she spit up a lot. Her tummy seemed to be hard and distended at times. We gave her some gripe water and it seems to help. We’re really hoping that it’s not reflux. Hopefully this will pass too, but we’re going to discuss it at her one month ped appointment next week. It’s not affecting her weight though. She’s now 10 lbs 9 oz! I read that metabolically, babies no long need to eat during the night at 11 lbs. We’ll see if that’s true because I really looking forward to that.

So that’s where we are now. I can’t wait to see my kids grow up. I definitely feel different towards Avery than I do with Max. I see such potential in her and I can’t wait to guide her when she becomes a strong independent woman. I guess only mothers have these feelings for their daughters (not that I don’t see potential in Max). It’s just different with a girl. I also have mixed feelings about having a third kid. It was sad to think that Avery will be our last, but never say never. Something I never had thought beforehand if I had unlimited means, I would have another kid in an instant. I can only see that happening if we win the lottery though, so there’s about 1 in 100,000,000 chance that we will have another. =P

Part Two: Recovery

2011-03-01T20:40:00.001-08:00

We were given one of the smallest maternity rooms in the ward, which was ok with me because at least we had a private room. It was half the size of the room that I was in when we had Max. There maternity ward was packed and some people had to share rooms. A whole team of nurses transferred me to the maternity bed and then the grandparents came in to meet Avery. We were all in good spirits. I was totally coherent and had a lot of energy, which was the complete opposite of what I felt like after I had Max. Everyone was in good spirits. Max was in preschool. We didn't want him to miss Valentine's Day at school because he was excited for all of the activities and it was a Monday, so we wanted him to keep to his normal routine as much as we could. (Coincidentally, both Max and Avery were born on a Monday). He spent the night at Hubby's parents' house the night before though and he stayed there during the week we were in the hospital because Hubby stayed with me every night.

Hubby and I were really excited for the moment when Max met his baby sister. Max had been looking forward to meeting her for so long. The grandparents picked him up and brought him to us. He came into the room and was really happy, with Valentines in hand and all. He I think was more excited about being at the hospital because it was a new place for him. He saw Avery and looked at her for a minute and then started to explore the room, which is not the reaction we were anticipating. We had him hold his sister though and he was really happy. I was afraid that he'd freak out about me being hooked up to tubes and compression cuffs on my legs, but he just asked what my IV was for and I said it was my medicine and that was that. It took awhile for him to understand that mommy and daddy were not going home that day. I could only explain that mommy needed to get better. Max visited every day except the day we went home. He actually requested to go to the hospital to see is baby sister. Avery's aunts also visited on the first day and My dad and Hubby's grandmother and Aunt visited on day 2. Other people had wanted to come, but we politely told then to visit after we got home so that I could recover. My mom visited everyday though and took care of Avery when Hubby and I napped or when Hubby went home to feed Pocky and do some necessary errands.

Once all of the visitors left on day one, we were ready to get settled with Avery. I had decided that we should room-in for the night because I remembered that when we used the nursery with Max, we'd get a call when he woke up so that I could feed him, but I'd had to wait awhile for a nurse to bring him to our room, and then Hubby would bring him back to the nursery. I thought we'd get more rest and learn her cues better if she stayed with us the whole night. We didn't have much choice anyway because the hospital scaled back the nursery and only accepted a few babies a time with a waiting list because most parents preferred rooming-in. Hubby and I were really surprised to learn this.

Like our time in the hospital with Max, we didn't really have many restful periods. A nurse checked my vital signs every two hours and Avery's every four hours. This time, baby and mother shared the same nurse, so instead of two different nurses checking on mother and baby at different intervals, the same nurse checked on me and Avery during the same visit. Therefore, there were less people coming in and out of the room and less visits. I actually had some of the same nurses that I had when Max was born. I also kept track of when my meds would be delivered (every 6 hours) so that I can decide when the best time would rest would be without interruption. The babies were also weighed and had their jaundice checked via a light test at midnight every night. I didn't have any lactation consultants visit though. Maybe because I wasn't a new mother? The nurses were required to evaluate our latch though and maybe we weren't referred to a consultant since we weren't having problems.

I actually had one problem. I wasn't producing enough urine and my OB gave orders to push the fluids, so they upped my IV and I started drinking tons of water, which I didn't divulge to my mom My reh zi started (the one month period of healing) and I had ran out of the special water derived from rice alcohol that I was supposed to drink. (My mom had ordered the first week of food from a service that delivered to the hospital everyday and she bought Chinese herbs to cook with for the rest of the month). I wasn't supposed to drink regular water at all, which I thought was damn near impossible. I guzzled regular warm water down though and I was ok by morning.

After a c-section, you're supposed to get up and moving around 12 hours after the surgery. They really held to that. At around 2 am, the nurse had me get up and dangle my feet. Then she had me get up. Surprisingly I wasn't lightheaded at all like I was then I first got up after having Max. I actually felt pretty good despite being sleep deprived already, so we headed for the bathroom so that I could brush my teeth. Once I got up though...let's just say it looked like a scene from Dexter due to all pooled blood, which was normal. I got cleaned up, brushed my teeth, and headed back to bed.

Avery was a night owl, just like Hubby and I before we had Max. She had her most wakeful periods from 12 am - 3 am, which just added to our sleep deprivation. It was a shock to the system being up with a newborn again, especially one that had her days and nights mixed up. Breastfeeding was going ok though. I believe that Avery is a bit tongue tied like Max was. My nipples were already sore and were starting to blister and scab, but at least I knew how it was supposed to be done.

Avery was examined on day two by the pediatrician in our room since the rounds were no longer done in the nursery. The ped said everything was fine and she looked great. I got disconnected from all of the tubes on day two and went for some short walks around the maternity ward and took a sponge bath, which felt so good after sweating so much, which is one of the body's way of eliminating all of the extra fluid from pregnancy. Once the IV meds stopped, I was actually in a lot of pain. It was much more painful this time than it was when I had Max. Maybe because now I'm three years older and my body wasn't healing as fast? I remember last time that they offered me a choice between vicodin and ibuprofen and I actually said I didn't want vicodin if I didn't have to take it and I was fine. This time, all I wanted was vicodin and the pain was so bad at one point that I had to take both vicodin and ibuprofen at the same time. I also got to start eating on day two, starting with soup in the morning and solid foods at night. Avery was good during the day, probably because she was worn out from being up all night. Something funny that I won't forget was that the floor in our maternity room was slanted, so on day two Hubby was talking to the nurse and the bassinet wheels weren't locked, so it just started sliding. I had to interrupt them to point out the moving baby! The operating room floor was also slanted because the gurney had also started sliding. Strange.

Night came and Hubby suggested we should give Avery supplemental formula since my milk hadn't come in yet and we wanted to control any jaundice that we knew was coming. I reluctantly agreed, even though Avery was pooping and peeing fine with the colostrum she was getting from me. He also suggested it so that we could sleep a bit longer. We gave it to her early morning on day 3 and asked to bring her to the nursery because she was up all night again. Sure enough, she conked out around 3 am in the nursery and didn't come back to our room awake until 7 am.

The rest of the time in the hospital was uneventful. I took a shower on day 3, which felt so good. Of course, it was a very controlled shower since I couldn't come in contact with cold water or air due to the reh zi. I also did more walking, which was actually slow going because my legs felt heavy. I also started pumping every time we gave Avery formula. I ended up pumping only two times though while in the hospital. The first time I pumped was before my milk came in and I only produced a few drops, which was normal. My milk was starting to come in on day 3, which was a relief. Avery was up again at night and we gave her formula. Hubby and I were still really tired so we asked to send Avery to the nursery, but they were full. She ended up sleeping a long stretch around 3 am again, so we got some sleep. I got my staples out on day 4 and did more walking. My milk came in fully and Avery started eating well. I pumped the second time and produced about an ounce, which I think was in line with how much newborns eat. It was a relief because I had doubts about my milk supply. Avery was pooping and peeing well and although she did develop jaundice, her highest bilirubin reading was around 12, low - low/moderate risk. It looked like we were going to avoid the NICU. The nurses also commented on how strong Avery was. Changing her was like an arm wrestling and her kicks were really strong, just like how it was in the womb.

Check out was 11 am on day 5 and we headed home. I was so happy to go home, but also strangely sad to leave the hospital because it was probably the last time I would be there. I also couldn't believe how different the hospital stay was this time around. Things were relatively relaxed and calm. No exahusting and painful labor, a planned c-section, no UV lights, no walking back and forth to the NICU, much less worry over breastfeeding, and best of all, Avery and I were going home together.

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Part One: Introducing Avery!

2011-02-24T20:38:00.001-08:00

Avery was born on 2/14/11 at 2:23 pm. She was 8 lbs 7 oz and 20 inches long. We can't be more thrilled!

I'm going to write about my birth experience and recovery just like I did with Max. This time around though, there's going to be a lot of comparisons between my first birth experience and the second. Although I'm pretty tired now, I feel that it's important to document these past days so that I have a record for myself and the journal helps with any baby blues that I may experience. Again, this will be candid and probably not for the faint of heart!

As I predicted, I couldn't sleep the night before the c-section. I wasn't that nervous about the procedure, but I was a bit anxious. I was also really excited to be done with pregnancy. I thought, "This is the last day that I'll be pregnant, that I'll have to sleep on my side, that I'll experience the uncomfortable pressure that I've been feeling and all of the bad pregnancy symptoms." It was bitter sweet for me. Although I was happy to be done, I was sad that this may be the last time that I will be pregnant. People say that you forget all the pains of pregnancy after you have the baby, but maybe I won't since I have this blog =P

I ended up falling asleep around 2 am and woke up around 6 am because we had to be at the hospital at 7:30. I woke up tired was surprisingly calm as I got ready. Hubby had a hard time waking up because he didn't sleep well either, so we ended up getting to the hospital at 7:50, which stressed me out, but I also thought what could possibly happen if we're late? It's not like they can do anything without me.

Once we got to the hospital, we found out that there were four unplanned c-sections ahead of my scheduled one at 9:30. It had started raining that morning and according to nurses, the theory is that the drop in barometric pressure causes membranes to rupture, or in other words, water to break. It was really busy in Labor and Delivery that morning. So busy that they first set me up in the c-section recovery room and planned to move me into a L&D room, but all the rooms ended up being full. I was worried that we wouldn't get a private room in the maternity ward because that would have really sucked, but we did end up with a private room. Once I got there, I changed into a gown and was hooked up to monitors and then climbed into bed a little after 8:00. The nurses couldn't give a good estimate of when our turn was going to be. They said most likely after lunch, maybe around 3:00 even. Too bad they didn't tell this to us before we left the house so that we could have slept in! I think I caught a few winks in but it was hard since there's a lot of activity in the recovery room that was at full capacity with all of these new mothers coming from surgery. Hubby was able to nod off a bit in his chair. (Interestingly, the hospital no longer had a newborn nursery where the newborns go to get evaluated and settled. The nurses just do it in the L&D rooms or the recovery room, which is why the recovery room was at full capacity. The newborn beds took up a lot of room. The good thing about this was that the mothers were able to see the baby's first bath and all that good stuff. I believe though that this was a cost cutting measure by the hospital. There's actually lots of examples of streamlining that the hospital did that made my experience different than the last, which as interesting to me because part of what I do for a living is to help make processes more efficient and effective. More examples later.) My mom had arrived at 8 even though I insisted that she come after the baby was born, but she wanted to be there. She agreed to go home though after we learned about the back up, but she really wanted to be there to hold the baby fresh out of the oven, so she had us call her when it was our turn.

The time waiting went by fast though. I even caught the latest episode of Real Housewives of Atlanta (one of my favorite shows) by watching it on Hubby's phone. It kept my mind at ease and made me very happy. The nurse said that I was contracting regularly about every 15 minutes. I was really surprised because I wasn't feeling them at first, but I started feeling them later on. I was actually starting labor! I guess February 14 was meant to be the birthday since I would have called my OB if I was at home due to contractions. The nurse said that maybe the contractions would bump me up in line since I was in labor myself, but since I wasn't in pain, I wasn't. Another nurse inserted my IV at around 10:00 and it was actually pretty painful, which I couldn't believe. The most painful IV I had ever, which was a sign of things to come.

During noon hour, my nurse from the c-section team informed us that we were up next. After that, I started to get really anxious and a bit nervous, but I was really happy that our time had come. The anesthesiologist came and answered questions that I had. I only had two: (1) Would I be sedated - No unless I really needed to relax the baby is born and (2) What is the pain medication given afterwards - Morphine.

It was a bit after 1:00 when our turn finally came. Hubby put on his jumpsuit and was told to wait in the hallway. I got out of bed and walked across the hall to the operating room. It was so surreal walking into the room, especially since I didn't when I delivered Max. Shortly after, my OB came in and I was relived to see it since it meant that the we were actually starting and she was actually going to deliver my baby. (As you may recall, my OB didn't deliver Max because she was on vacation. I have the same OB as my sister-in-law did and my OB's father delivered her first child because he was on call. The labor was so fast for her second child that the OB actually missed the birth and got there afterwards.) The nurses and OB apologized for the long wait and had said that that's how OB goes. One of the nurses was thanking me for being so patient and pleasant through the pre-op process and then my OB remarked that I follow directions well. I hopped up on the operating table and got my spinal block. The first numbing shot actually hurt, which was surprising because I don't remember the epidural that I got with Max hurting much. Then I got the actually spinal block, which hurt as well and burned when it sent the initial shock wave through the nervous system. The blocked worked really fast because I couldn't move my legs after a minute or two. The assisting OB also came in, and it was my OB's father. (Can you imagine having a OB-GYN practice with your father?) The mood in the operating room was light. We had all noticed that it was unusually warm because the thermostat wasn't working. Usually, the operating room is 69 degrees but it was 74 degrees and my OB said, "I know what we'd all want right now, I nice diet coke!" (My OB really likes diet coke and mentions how she drinks it all the time, so I found that funny, especially since I was about to be cut open!). She started using a folded curtain to fan the nurse, but really to dry the iodine they put on my belly to sterlize that area. They put the curtain up and asked if I felt any pain, although pressure is ok, and I said pressure, no pain. Then they got started and Hubby came in and sat next to me. I dared Hubby to peek over the curtain and he started giggling. We were both really giddy and excited. Hubby and I were joking with each other, which was good because it distracted me from the surgery. I starting shaking a bit, it was nowhere near as bad as the shaking I experienced the first time. It took longer this time to get to the baby because of the previous scar tissue. My OB also took away the existing scar, which had turned into a reddish purple keloid scar, so I was glad. (The scar was also slanted upwards towards the right, since Max was lying on the right side. This baby was also lying on the right side. So far, the current scar hasn't developed into a keloid. I could go to a dermatologist to get the scar minimized if it does, but keloid scar never really bothered me. It's not like I'm in bikinis all the time. I think it bothered me more that the scar wasn't straight across. Oh well.) I could smell that burning smell and actually could feel tugging as the OB used scissors to cut through the layers, but no pain. My OB was describing all the steps she was taking, which was reassuring. She does this with any procedure she does. I heard her say that there was clear fluid. No meconium! I couldn't stop wondering how big the baby is since it was the only unknown left. Was I really built to have big babies, or will this baby girl be average? They finally made it to the baby and the first thing I heard my OB say was, "I need a vacuum" and I thought "Oh crap! I really hope there's not going to be a problem." Then she said she didn't need it anymore and after a lot pushing on the top of my uterus, which hurt a lot because because I had trapped gas right above it and it caused a lot of painful pressure, they got the baby out. I heard Avery cry and felt the most extreme happiness and joy you can only feel when you give birth. I didn't cry though like I did when Max was born, maybe because I didn't go through such an ordeal as the first birth. Right when she came out, everyone was surprised by her size and here is what I heard: Assisting OB - "She's good size!" (which is OB speak for a big baby). My OB - "Where were you hiding her?" (My uterus had measured the right size all along the pregnancy, so no wonder why I was so uncomfortable towards the end.) Scrub Nurse - "You fed her well!" Anesthesiologist - "She's beautiful!" I didn't get to see Avery because the neonatal nurse took her to clean her off and assess her. I was caught up in the excitement and forgot to request to get glimpse of her before she was assessed if everything was ok. Oops! Avery had Apgar scores of 9 and 9, to which my OB remarked that she was very pink, which was good. Avery actually peed right before she got weighed, so her official birth weight could have been heavier than 8 lbs 7 oz. My OB jokingly said that Avery doesn't get the credit for the pee. Hubby went to see Avery, making sure to turn away from all of the action, and snapped some pics for me to see. The nurse said that Avery's umbilical cord was thicker than usual, which meant that she received a lot more nutrients. Then the nurse gave me my first glimpse and the first thing I thought was "Omg! She looks just like Max when he was born!" She had the same chubby face and small eyes, non-existent eyebrows, and wavy hair, but she had a perfectly round c-sectioned head. I also surprised at her size. The nurse held her next to my head and all I could say was "Hi!" while I had the biggest smile on my face. Hubby snapped a pic and he and Avery went to the recovery room.

The OB's finished stitching me up, which took a bit of time. During so I felt a lot of pressure from the gas, so I was really uncomfortable, but still on a high. So what do father and daughter OB's chit chat about when they are performing the most routine part of the surgery? My OB talked about her daughter's ice skating routine. I still think it's funny how people chit chat in the operating room. I also noticed that there were less nurses in the room this time around, which I'm guess is due to the streamlining. They finished and pulled down the curtain and sat me up, which is when the pressure went away. My OB said that everything went well and my reproductive organs look good and also reviewed my results from the monitors and noted that I was contracting. I thanked my OB and the staff and off I went to the recovery room.

Hubby and Avery were waiting for me in the room. I wasn't too groggy, but I was kinda freaked out that I couldn't move my legs at all, which I wasn't the first time since I was so out of it. It was really neat to see Avery get settled. At this point I stared to tear in happiness. I got to see her first bath, which I didn't when Max was born. I also got to breastfeed her, which was quite natural and easy. She was so comfortable that she spent almost 30 minutes on one side, which prompted the nurse to say be careful because your nipples are going to get sore. That didn't occur to me until she said it, and I thought, "Oh, ya. That's right." During the time, the grand parents had arrived, but my mom wasn't allowed in the recovery room like she had hoped. I was in the recovery room for an hour and half and then was wheeled into my maternity room, with Hubby following behind pushing Avery in her bassinet.

Ok. that's part one. Part two will be recovery and part three will be bringing home baby.

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2011-02-13T23:28:00.001-08:00

I can't believe that it's finally time to have the baby, although it feels like I've been pregnant forever. I've been a bit anxious, but surprisingly calm. It's very weird knowing the exact time and day that I'm having a baby. We were lucky that the baby didn't come early because we still have baby tasks to do, but at this point I've finished almost everything I wanted to. I've been sick with a cold this past week so I didn't do as much as I wanted. It was a sign that I should slow down and just rest before the baby comes. Besides the cold, I've been feeling ok. Just the normal uncomfortableness of being big. I'm a lot smaller than I was while pregnant with Max. I'm 14 pounds lighter than I was at this point with Max and I only gained 35 pounds. Yay! I did indulge though this past weekend by eating ice cream and other things since I'll be eating reh zi food for a month and after that, I'm going to start eating heathy again.

I'm really excited to meet my little girl. Max is really excited to meet his little sister too and I can't wait for that moment to happen. Hopefully I can sleep tonight!

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2011-01-15T20:39:00.001-08:00

Max had his 3 year check up at the Ped and he was in the 75th percentile for both weight and height. Still a big kid. I didn't catch his weight or height measurements this time because he was too old for the baby scale and was measured outside of the exam room where I waited (and Hubby couldn't recall what the measurements were even though he was there.) I think he's around 33 lbs and 39 inches? This appointment was different because the nurse gave him an eye test where he had to cover each eye and describe the drawings that he saw. They also took his blood pressure. Hubby had the genius idea to bring along his new doctor kit that he got for Christmas and each time the nurse or doctor pulled out a medical tool, he pulled his out from his kit and started examining as well. It was so cute! Maybe this will inspire him to be a doctor =).

On the baby front, I have about a month left to go. I feel like it's still far away, but I know it's going to come so quickly. We haven't prepared much for this baby yet. I just pulled out some baby clothes from storage and bought a new crib since Max's crib was a hand me down and it's origins are unknown. It's also a drop side crib and Max was rough with it, especially since he spent so much time in it. It was only a couple a months ago that we moved him into a toddler bed since he never tried to climb out by himself. (He still doesn't get out of bed by himself. He always calls for me when he wakes up in the morning, which is good because he wont' suddenly pop into our room in the middle of the night!) I hope this baby doesn't come early!

I'm slowly getting prepared mentally. I know that the baby is coming, but I guess the true reality hasn't sunk in yet. I think it's because that we had such a traumatic experience when we had Max at birth that I have to think this time around will be much different. We at least know that we're having a c-section, this baby will probably be big (as my OB speculates), and that the baby will probably have jaundice. I'm also hoping that breast feeding will go much better. The true unknown is how Max is going to react to the baby, but I think he'll do ok. If anything, we have lots of family to distract him and will shower him with attention. I'm also dreading the tiredness and sleepiness nights, but at least I've become accustomed to sleep deprivation.

I'm so ready to be done with this pregnancy. This one was much more difficult than the first. It all started with the morning sickness. Then, during my second and third trimester, I was really tired. There were some evenings where I just had to lie in bed because I was so tired. I also became dizzy and light headed sometimes. I found out that I was anemic in two ways after my 28th week blood test. I was iron deficient, like I was during the first pregnancy, but I was also b-12 deficient, which makes you "feel like crap" (the exact words of my primary care doctor) because you have no energy. I also caught a bad cold that lingered for two weeks, complete with very bad sinus pain. It wouldn't go away faster because I was so anemic. I started to take a prescription strength iron and folic acid supplement and I got two monthly b-12 shots so far. We'll have to see if this anemia is pregnancy related because if it's not, I'll probably need to continue the shots. I don't think I'll forget how hard this pregnancy was, which may deter me from having a third =P. The good news is that I'm on track to gain under 35 pounds total and I'll be 15 pounds lighter than when I had Max. I haven't had the eating healthy lecture from my OB. In fact, only gained 3/4 of a pound since my second to last appointment, which prompted my OB to ask if I'm eating ok, which I am!

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Happy Third Birthday Max!

2010-12-31T21:52:00.000-08:00

I can't believe Max is three years old already! He's grown so much in the past year. He's become quite the social butterfly. He takes a little bit of time to warm up to people that he doesn't see that often, but after he does, he's very friendly and talks non-stop! Hubby and I don't know where he gets it from, because it's not from either of us =P He's also very polite. He says thank you whenever I put his clothes away for him. haha. He doesn't really have tantrums, but he still has his moments. Hubby says he's pretty reasonable. After you explain why something has to be the way it is, he usually accepts it. Dare I say that the terrible two's are over? We still have to work on his whining. All in all, I think he's a pretty good kid =)

We had a great birthday. We had a party with his friends and family at Gymboree on the 26th and today we went to his favorite restaurant, Fresh Choice, with family for lunch. I think Fresh Choice will be a tradition until Max says it isn't his favorite restaurant anymore.

Something I wanted to jot down before I forget...Max is really into superheroes, especially Spider Man. So to get him to eat his veggies, I told him that Spider Man is red because he eats tomatoes and the Hulk is green because he eats broccoli and salad. I also said that veggies make superheroes big and strong. Max bought it and he started eating veggies more! Whenever he asks if superheroes eat junk food, say cookies, I say no. Also, one night he couldn't sleep, and I told him that superheroes sleep a lot so that they have a lot of energy to fight bad guys. I also told him he needs to sleep a lot to become big and strong because that's when he grows. Max's first reaction was, "I thought veggies make you big and strong" as if eating veggies was enough. I reassured him that sleep does the same thing and soon after that he fell asleep! I'm loving this new breakthrough. I wonder how long he's going to buy into it.

2010-11-15T12:35:00.000-08:00

3 more months to go! I can’t believe that the second trimester has flown by so fast. I do feel like I’ve been pregnant forever though. This pregnancy is much different than the last. Physically, there was the morning sickness, which thankfully went away. I’m not eating as much as I did during the first time. I have not had one eating healthy lecture from my OB. I’ve been gaining the normal amount of weight each month. There was one month where I gained 7 lbs (eek) but all the rest of the months I was either at the goal or under. I had only gained l.5 lbs at my last appointment, prompting the OB to ask if I was eating alright. I have no idea why my weight gain is so erratic. If I would have known that I’d make it through pie month only gaining 1.5 lbs, I would have eaten more! I’m craving different things, but nothing like my burger craze the last time. I even indulge in chocolate, which is something I cut out altogether last time. I sometimes get a craving for iced coffee too! Overall, I’m not as hungry. Maybe because it’s a girl? I don’t feel that huge and I can still wear my rings. Plus I don’t have any swelling yet. I still get tired now and then and a bit light headed, which is new. I’m not sleeping as well as I did the last time. I remember being able to fall into a sleep deep really fast, but not this time around.

This time around, I’m not obsessed with every little detail of pregnancy. Last time I read three pregnancy books simultaneously. I guess there’s not much new to learn now and I have an almost three year old occupying my time. We haven’t gotten ready for the baby much. I guess I’ll be spending my Christmas vacation pulling all of the baby stuff out of storage. We also don’t have a dedicated nursery yet, so there’s nothing to decorate. We figure that the baby will be in our room for the first month or two anyway, so we’ll decide what to do then. I just started buying some clothes for the baby, but that’s about it. I do feel the need to nest though. I just cleaned out my closet again and I’m starting to get rid of junk here and there. I figured that when we eventually move, I don’t want to be clearing out all the stuff at once, so I might as well do it gradually.

The biggest difference this time around is that we get to pick the baby’s birthday since I’m having a repeat c-section. It’s so weird to pencil in your baby’s birth down to the minute. It still may happen before the date we chose, but at least she won’t be overdue. That was not fun last time.

Max has said that he wants to get his baby sister a gift. Awwwwe! I thought it was the other way around where the parents get the older sibling a gift and say it’s from the baby to ease the transition. He has these three Little People figures that represent me, Hubby, and himself and he said he needs another one for his baby sister. I glad he understands that he’s going to have a sister, but I hope the transition is smooth.

2010-10-07T13:03:00.001-07:00

We’re having a girl!!! We had our 20^th week ultrasound and requested to know the sex. I’m too much of a control freak to not know and Hubby wanted to know too. We were so happy when we learned the news. On the way home from the appointment, we even decided on a name. It was easy since we had thought of several girl names before Max was born. If we were to have another boy, we’d probably be undecided until the last minute since it took us months to settle on Max’s name.

I had hoped for a girl. I think it’s just natural for parents to want one of each. I would have been happy either way since it would be nice for Max to have a brother. Hubby always wished he had a brother and I always wished I had a sister. Max preferred having a sister though. He was really excited when he found out he’s getting a baby sister, so it works out. Earlier in the pregnancy, Hubby said that he hoped we’d have a girl because if we had another boy, I’d be overwhelmed by all of the testosterone in the house, heh. He also said that if we had a boy, there would be a lot of competition between the two.

Funny thing is, once I learned we’re having a girl, I was a bit sad that my cute little boy will be my only boy and he won’t be so little anymore soon. And then the thought of having three kids popped into my head, which I had never considered before. We’ll see. I’m thinking that when reality hits with having two, I’ll probably snap out of it =P

On the drive home from the appointment, Hubby and I talked about how different it’s going to be having a girl. Hubby is already stressing over the teenage years. I thought about how different it’ll be from the start. New clothes, new toys, even doing things differently like changing diapers. I can’t picture us punishing her as harshly as we do Max sometimes. There’s a double standard brewing already. I also thought about how we’re going to relate to each other. I’m looking forward to sharing all of the mother/daughter experiences we’ll have, but I wonder how it’ll be since I’m not a girly girl. My mom isn’t much of a girly girl either. She was in her younger years and she can be when she chooses too. She’s the one who actually taught me how to play sports! I also thought how similar my experience with a brother 4 years older than me will be to her experience having a brother 3 years older. My brother and I didn’t get along well when we were little. We fought a lot and didn’t have much in common until we were adults because of the age gap. Although, I pretty much idolized him and became interested in everything he did: video games, bmx bikes, skateboards, etc. It didn’t help that I played with all of his toys growing up. However, I did have Barbies and had tea parties with my stuffed animals too. Hopefully Max and his sister will be closer.

I just can’t believe still that our little family is growing and soon we’ll be a family of 4 + Pocky!

2010-09-24T12:46:00.001-07:00

I’m so amazed at Max’s developments over the last couple of months. His vocabulary is growing all the time and Hubby was amazed how he was saying 5 word sentences a couple of months ago. He’s started to ask what a particular word means. For instance, he’s been saying “Cool!” for awhile now, but a couple of weeks ago he actually asked me what cool means. I’m also surprised that he never referred to himself in the third person. He’s been using “I” and “me” correctly ever since he first starting using those words. Impressive! What cracks me up is when he says “thank you” when you give him a compliment. It’s so cute!

He’s also growing so fast. His head used to be exactly at my eye level when he’d run up next to me while I was lying in bed. It seems like overnight, he’s grown so much that I now I have to look up to him to make eye contact.

The biggest breakthrough lately is he’s now out of diapers/pull ups during the day. We’ve tried potty training here and there but it just didn’t seem like he caught on. Then we decided to go cold turkey over Labor Day weekend and sure enough, the 3 day method was successful. I also let him choose his own underwear and made it an incentive for him to keep going to the potty since I didn’t let him wear the underwear until he could prove to us that he was ready for it. He has a few accidents since accidents, but they are tapering off.

2010-09-08T13:19:00.001-07:00

A couple of nights ago, I put Max to bed after Hubby went to the gym. I had just let him watch a little TV before bedtime because I cut his nails (the only way to get him to sit still when doing this), which was a treat since we don’t let him watch at bedtime. I turned off the TV and he started protesting, “It’s not fair!” How does a 2.5 year old know the concept of fairness already?! I put him in bed and turned off the lights and he just yelled “it’s not fair” repeatedly. I let him go on for a few minutes and went into his room and explained that he just watched some TV, which was more than fair. He drifted off to sleep while still yelling. Later that night, Hubby and I heard him yelling “it’s not fair” a few times all of the sudden and he went back to sleep, which we thought was really funny. The little guy was actually dreaming about this! If he already knows that his life is unfair at 2.5 years old, I can’t imagine what his teenage years will be like!

2010-09-02T13:45:00.000-07:00

No, I haven’t abandoned this blog. I’ve just been really busy at work and since I still equate sitting in front of the computer as work, I tend not be at a computer to outside of work. Hubby has been posting lately, so I’ll have to refer to his blog for more recent events.

Another reason why I haven’t been blogging lately is that I’m pregnant again! I’m now 16 weeks along. After the miscarriage, I was even more determined to get pregnant, especially since I realized that I’d like my kids to be closer in age instead of further like I had wanted in the past. We tried and tried and nothing happened for 6 months, which was worrisome since it was easy for us to get pregnant the first two times. I even went as far as charting my ovulation to increase our chances. I believe though that it was meant to be. I had experienced the worst grief I had ever felt after my grandma passed away last December and I had experienced the most stress I had felt in years after a shake up at work in March. I’m glad I wasn’t pregnant during those times. I also feel that it’ll will be somewhat easier with a 3 year old and a newborn than a 2 year old because the terrible two’s are not a walk in the park!

I didn’t think I was pregnant because I had thought I started yet another period except I had some signs that didn’t add up. I had been going to cardio kickboxing classes starting in March, due to my need to relieve stress, and I was feeling great. My metabolism was up and I was full of energy. All of the sudden, I couldn’t hardly finish a class. At the same time, I automatically stopped drinking green tea, even though I’ve been drinking it almost every day at work since I started working. I guess subconsciously I knew I shouldn’t be drinking anymore. I took the test and sure enough, I was pregnant. It turned out that I was just spotting, which is upsetting to someone who has had a miscarriage. Throughout the first trimester, my motto was “cautiously optimistic.” My OB even said, “You go through the first pregnancy and you don’t think that something can go wrong, and it usually doesn’t. And then you go through the second and if something does go wrong, that’s all you think about.” We were reassured during week 6 when we had our first ultrasound for viability and saw Peanut for the first time. It looked like two jelly beans fused together. At that point, there’s 6 - 14% chance of a miscarriage down from 20%. At 10 weeks when you hear the heartbeat, then the risk goes down to 3%. We had another ultrasound at 12 weeks for the NT scan and saw Peanut again, who was moving around a lot! More reassurance came as my first trimester ended and then reality finally hit that I’m actually having a baby in February. I’ve already seen the baby twice and will see it again during the 20 week ultrasound. I only had one ultrasound last time.

This pregnancy has been very different than the last. I was very tired during the early weeks and felt lightheaded and dizzy a lot, which is a scary feeling. I also had morning sickness, but at night. I would be fine during the day but then I’d come home from work tired and nauseous and not wanting to eat. I only gained a half a pound from my first OB appointment to my second because I didn’t want to eat dinner. Although, I had no problems during lunchtime and ate a lot since I was hungry and craving meat. I think I’m finally over the morning sickness now, but I still get tired to the point where I feel almost exhausted after an easy walk to the park near my house and back. All of this is prompting people to say that I’m having a girl, we’ll see.

No cravings this time around, except maybe pizza. I’m on the hunt for the best pizza around and so far I’ve found discovered one new place that’s good. I’m determined not to gain as much weight this time around though like last time. Although, I’m off to a good start and I was 7 pounds lighter than I was at the start of the first pregnancy (cardio kickbox really worked!).

I learned that things happen earlier after your first pregnancy. You definitely start to show earlier and you start feeling the baby kick earlier. My OB also said two weeks ago that I needed to start sleeping on my back, which I wasn’t prepared for since I’m a back sleeper. Out of all things I’ve given up, I miss sleeping on my back the most.

We’ve tried to explain the pregnancy to Max. At first, he wouldn’t remember, but as my baby bump is getting bigger, he’s now realizing that there’s a baby. Every time we ask if he wants a brother or sister, he’ll say sister. I think it’s because he gets along with girls better. He also says though a baby brother is ok too. Hubby says that if we have another boy, I’ll probably be stressed out by all of the testosterone in the household. I’m still fearful of the unknown with juggling two little ones, but at least we have a better frame of reference, whereas we were blissfully ignorant before the first one. I’ve had so many people say this exact sentence to me: “Having the second isn’t just twice as hard, it’s exponentially harder.”

2010-06-03T12:43:00.000-07:00

All of the sudden, my son is obsessed with Spider-Man! Last week he saw a DVD cover of one of the Spider-Man movies at his grandparents’ house and said he wanted to watch it. We explained to him that the movie was too scary for him, and then he started repeated “Spider-Man is scary!” To avoid future nightmares, I explained to him that “Spider-Man is a good guy and a super hero that helps people.” Ever since then, he hasn’t stopped repeated that phrase. Then a couple of days later, we went shopping and just so happens that he saw a Spider-Man t-shirt and he got all excited. He took it off the rack and ran all over the store with it. I got it for him, (it was only $5, not bad for Gap shirt!) and he held it the whole way home. He’s been hugging the shirt like a security blanket and has worn it twice and wants to wear it all the time even though we explain that it needs to be washed.

I even asked if he like Spider-Man more than Dora (I rather him like Spider-Man), Diego (better than Dora), and the Wiggles, and he said yes! I wonder how long this will last. I find it funny that he likes Spider-Man even though he hasn’t seen any Spider-Man movies or shows. I guess he just likes the idea of a “good guy, super hero that helps people.”

2010-05-18T16:50:00.001-07:00

I must be getting old. I'm all excited for a new Sprouts market opening in my town. It's a chain but it supposedly has a feel of a farmer's market. I hear that it has better food than Trader Joe's and it's cheaper than Whole Foods. Hopefully, this will cut down the number of markets I frequent from 4 to 2. (Whole Foods for meat and produce, Trader Joe's for frozen food and goodies, Safeway for milk, and Asian market. Although we don't go to the Asian market that often.)

Now, if someone would open an Asian organic market... I can't believe that there isn't one near me! Oh, the opportunity!

2010-04-21T12:58:00.000-07:00

I really want to watch the documentary "Babies" that's coming out on mother's day weekend:

The adventure of a lifetime begins…

Directed by award-winning filmmaker Thomas Balmès, from an original idea by producer Alain Chabat, Babies simultaneously follows four babies around the world – from birth to first steps. The children are, respectively, in order of on-screen introduction: Ponijao, who lives with her family near Opuwo, Namibia; Bayarjargal, who resides with his family in Mongolia, near Bayanchandmani; Mari, who lives with her family in Tokyo, Japan; and Hattie, who resides with her family in the United States, in San Francisco.

Re-defining the nonfiction art form, Babies joyfully captures on film the earliest stages of the journey of humanity that are at once unique and universal to us all.

If you ever asked yourself when you kid was a baby,"How do villagers in (fill in country) do (fill in baby related activity)" this is your chance! There's even a baby from the bay area, no less.

Going on my Netflix queue right now even though it won't be out on DVD for awhile.

2010-04-09T16:53:00.000-07:00

Hubby and I celebrated our 5^th anniversary recently. Instead of going to a stuffy, fancy dinner, I bought tickets to the Warriors game from our good friend who has season tickets. I actually surprised Hubby with the tickets on his birthday, and for an extra bonus to him, he didn’t have to worry about any anniversary planning. Hubby and I had a lot of fun going in through the VIP entrance, eating garlic fries and nachos, and watching the Warriors actually win. Since my mom graciously volunteered to have Max spend the night and his grandparent’s house, we wanted to make the most of the night and tried to watch a 10:45 movie (crazy!) even though we were already yawning, but tickets were all sold out. We were able to sleep in though until 10 am the next day, which is something I hadn’t done since Max was born. Best anniversary ever =) I can't believe it's been 5 years!

2010-04-09T16:50:00.000-07:00

One more thing that Max says before I forget. He'll call his Aunts "GuGu," which means your father's sister in Mandarin, but he calls his uncle "Pedur." At least I try to get him to say "Uncle Peter". He also went through a phase lately where he called Hubby and I by our first names. That didn't last long, about a day, since I didn't respond to him when he did that.

2010-04-05T12:17:00.000-07:00

I wanted to jot down somethings that Max says so that I don't forget them when he's older:

- He'll see us drink soda and say "so-DA" with an upward inflection on the "DA". His aunt gave him a little blood orange Italian soda the other day, which was his first soda experience, and he must of said s0-DA! 10 times since he liked it so much.

-When he was younger and didn't understand what we were saying to him or he was confused, he would say "eh" or "huh." It was more like a little grunt. Now he says "what" with emphasis on the t. He's says it so seriously it makes us giggle.

-Although I keep telling him that his little Gund lamb is not a bunny, he still calls it Bunny. We have the same lamb that's about 3X bigger and he calls it Lambie, which is the name that Gund gave, so I know he understands that Bunny is a lamb.

-Max loves dog stuffed animals. The Mandarin word for dogs is "go," so he has a "baby gogo" and a "big gogo."

-He calls his blankie "My-kie."

-He's learned his colors, but if you ask him what color something is like Elmo, he'll say "red and green and red." He probably thinks that if he lists multiple colors, he can't be wrong.

2010-02-23T15:55:00.000-08:00

When Hubby and I were little, visiting relatives would bring us clothes from Taiwan. You could instantly tell these clothes were from Taiwan because they always said something that was grammatically incorrect or had some cute animal or design on it, or all three combined. I had t-shirts and shoes from the brand “Jump” and they would say something like, “I like eat ice cream. Sweet Shop. Taste good.” We (well maybe just me, I don’t about Hubby) actually liked the clothes when we were little, even though it wasn’t like anything kids at school were wearing. We didn’t know any better. Now Hubby and I just laugh as we reminisce. So, to carry on this grand tradition, Hubby requested that I get something for Max that was similar while I was in Taiwan and I agreed. (We are cruel parents, aren’t we?) Surprisingly, it was hard to find clothes that fit the description and when I did, they were really expensive! Finally, after much searching through a street market, I came across this shirt for $3 that features the words “Black Dog" and Important Spirit” with a blue car along with stripes that would make the kid wearing it look like a bumble bee. Love it! There’s no pic of Max wearing this shirt though because he refuses to wear it for some reason. He never had an adverse reaction to any other piece of clothing. Hrmm. Smart kid.

2010-01-28T13:54:00.000-08:00

I just got back from my trip to Taiwan with my parents and brother. I was glad that I had the opportunity to visit my grandfather’s grave in Taipei, which is also my grandmother’s final resting place. We said our final goodbyes and burned money for my grandparents (paper money - a tradition so that the departed would have money in their afterlife). I knew that if I didn’t go with my family during this trip, I would have probably never gone to visit. Finding the site would have been impossible if I was on my own. I’m also glad that we did it as a family. It was nice to be reunited during this time.

Taipei is similar to other big Asian cities... metro/subway, polluted, crowded, fast paced. What sets Taiwan apart from the other counties I’ve visited for me is that I actually felt like I could fit in. I could communicate and get by with my elementary Mandarin and I knew a little bit of the customs. It didn’t feel so foreign to me. It’s definitely my country of ethnic origin, which brings up the never ending debate among people from Taiwan: Are we Chinese or Taiwanese? During college, after this came up in my Asian American History class, I had a debate with my parents about what ethnicity they were and I got them to agree with me that we’re Chinese American, not Chinese despite the fact that they were both born in China and not Taiwanese since they had been out of Taiwan for so long that there wasn’t much of a connection anymore.

Here are some other random thoughts about the trip:

It was cold, windy, and rainy. Just like home when I left. It was so foggy that we didn’t bother going up to the top of Taipei 101, which had been the tallest building in the world until the Burj Dubai took that title over just a month ago.

People are very polite. Actually, the only Asian country I’ve been to that wasn’t polite was China.

My parents must have been blown away with how much Taipei has changed since they lived there. Whole parts of the city were new to them and riding the metro was a new concept for them. It was great to hear them reminisce about some of their old hang outs and what school life was like for them, but they couldn’t relate to the city as it is now.

My brother and I could not imagine what life would have been like if my parents stayed in Taiwan. We kept asking my parents if they could imagine what life would have been like if they didn’t immigrate to the US and they couldn’t either. I think we were all thankful that my parents moved to the US.

The food was good! We weren’t brave enough to try the food at the famous night markets, but we did eat at some small stalls. I loved how even my wontons and red bean buns were fresh and not frozen. I did not like, however, the pastries and desserts. They really like butter in Taiwan and you can taste the saturation. I brought home some Basil Chicken Doritos and California Roll Ruffles for Hubby. We still haven’t tasted them yet, but those flavors were so intriguing that I had to get them.

There are “no USA beef” signs in restaurant windows. Kind of funny yet depressing at the same time. Other countries are rightfully afraid of our beef!

Everything in Daiso was $39 NT, or $1.25. Everything!

I had my lenses replaced for my glasses. Right before my trip I had asked my optician how much new lenses would cost and the total without insurance was $350 with two week delivery. It only cost $45 in Taiwan and the lenses were ready the same day. They were even thinner than my old lenses. They must have learned some efficiencies since almost everyone in Taiwan wears glasses.

Hubby and Max were on their own for 6 days. Hubby said it wasn’t that hard on him, especially since they went over to Max’s grandparents’ and cousins’ house a lot. After just 6 days of being away, it seemed like Max got even bigger and is now more talkative. I missed Max a lot and he missed me. He didn’t want to go to bed during the first night I got back. We turned off the lights and he just kept crying for me. I was so tired and jet lagged that I cuddled with him in the rocking chair and we fell asleep together instantly.

2 years old!

2010-01-28T13:53:00.001-08:00

Max recently had his two year check-up and he was 30 lbs and 35.25 inches tall, which is the 75^th percentile for both. I guess they don’t measure head circumference anymore after the 18 month appointment, I can't believe he’s already a two year old! He’s now a fully functioning little being. He’s grown and changed so much just in the last couple of months. Dare I say that I think parenting is a little easier now that he’s a little more independent? I probably just jinxed myself, but I think it’s easier now that he communicates better, sleeping through the night, feeding himself, etc. He’s even telling us that he needs to go to the potty, although he’s not completely potty trained yet. I think he had a developmental growth spurt right around the time he turned two when we took a family trip to San Diego to celebrate his birthday (and to take advantage of a free ticket for him while he was still under two). We went to the zoo and Legoland and he had so much fun seeing all the animals and running around the Legoland playground. He learned some new words, especially animals. He liked San Diego so much that he would yell out “SAN DIEGO!” every so often. The look of excitement on his face when he saw something new was priceless. Since San Diego, it seems like has Max become much more loquacious. Sometimes we can’t understand what he’s saying, but most of the time we get the gist. He can even speak in short sentences like “What you doing?”, “What’s that?” or “I fell down.” I was totally taken aback when we were brushing his teeth one day and all of the sudden he grabbed the toothbrush out of my hand and said “I do it” for the first time.

Although parenting is getting a bit easier, it’s still challenging. It’s easier physically, I guess because we’re much more rested and he’s more independent now, but it’s harder mentally and emotionally. Max is definitely into his terrible two’s. He tests us every day and rebels. He has frequent tantrums from time to time and he gets frustrated very easily. If he can’t do something like open a toy, he’ll get flustered and start trying and just give up really fast. I think once he starts learning patience and how to express his frustration better, he’ll be able to work through his problems better. Even though we are in the terrible two’s, it’s such a joy to be with Max. His expressions are endless and we have so much fun with him every day as we all discover new things together.

I was talking to my coworker the other day that has a daughter two months younger than Max and we both were saying how it’s kind of sad that our little toddlers are no longer babies. I do miss the baby stage…not the tough aspects, but I miss the cute little baby stage and it’s even hard now to remember that phase.

2010-01-08T16:48:00.000-08:00

We recently took Max to get his hair cut professionally. It was getting really long and I couldn’t fathom sitting in the tub trying to go at it with scissors again. We first considered going to one of those specialty kids salons so that his first time wouldn’t be so traumatic, but I just could not justify spending $40 on a 2 year old’s hair cut. So, we ended up going to good ol’ Lucky Cuts, where Hubby has been getting his hair cut for years…for $7.99. Hubby got his hair cut first so that Max could see what it was like. Then we put Max on Hubby’s lap and the barber tried to use the clippers. Max really did not like that and wouldn’t sit still as he cringed. He was so anxious that he wouldn't even wear the apron. Then, the barber tried with scissors with some success, but Max wouldn’t stay in one position long enough, so the barber brought out a big bucket of Dum Dums and let Max choose one. Immediately, the situation changed completely. He had never had a lollipop before and once he started eating it, he loved it and sat still enough for the barber to go at it with scissors. Not a peep from Max as the barber cut at most 1.5 inches off. Half way through, Max dropped his first lollipop, so we gave him a second one and he was happy as a clam again. So at least now we know that lollipops are the answer for a trauma free hair cut and that lollipops will probably come in handy in other situations as well. (Not that I’m going to give him lollipops all the time. I’ve only given him candy twice so far. I’m thinking lollipops will be good for those painful shots, ridiculously long lines, etc.)

Here are some pics:

"Pop" in hand, as he affectionately calls them.

2009-12-29T23:52:00.000-08:00

My grandmother passed away the week before Christmas. I was fortunate to have her in my life for 32 of her 97 years. She helped raise me and needless to say, she had a great influence on my life. It's been especially hard because I have not experience a death of someone close to me until now.

Halloween 2009

2009-11-02T21:31:00.000-08:00

Max had the time of his life on Halloween, literally! I don’t think he’s ever had so much fun ever. This was his first time trick-or-treating because last year he wasn’t walking yet. He was sooo cute in his penguin costume. He looked like he was waddling like a penguin when he ran up and down driveways. We went trick-or-treating with his cousins who are 3 and 6 and wheeled the little ones around in a wagon from house to house. He wasn’t too sure of what they were doing in the beginning, but he followed their lead and eventually caught on. He actually went inside the first house and we had to go get him. We also had to stop him from taking too much candy and the first couple of houses because Max would just keep taking candy and didn’t know that he should stop. It was funny hearing people say “just take three” and then watching Max keep taking candy since he didn’t know how to count to three. Eventually he learned the etiquette. He rang door bells, would try to say trick-or-treat and thank you, but always made sure to say “Bye Bye!” Actually, when we told him to say thank you, he’d say “youelcome”. He did get distracted by some balloons on people’s porches and one croquette set. He also pointed at Halloween decorations and asked “What’s this?” and people at the doors would try to explain. Towards the end of the night, he was getting tired and we could see that he felt like getting out of the wagon, running up to the door with his bucket of candy, and then coming back to the wagon was hard work, but he didn’t want to stop

So, what was the reward for all of that hard work? Since he had never had candy before and probably didn’t know what he was collecting, I only let him have half of a fun size kit kat at the end of the night. We left all the candy at his cousins’ and he didn’t miss it. He also learned the words “Halloween”, “funny”, and “pumpkin”.

2009-10-29T12:25:00.001-07:00

10/29/09

I was going to the post the entry below after entering the second trimester, but unfortunately, we didn’t get that far. I was 9 weeks and 6 days along at my second OB appt last Friday. The OB said she’d try to find a heartbeat, but usually you can’t hear one until 10 weeks. She couldn’t find one and scheduled an ultrasound for viability on Monday. I wasn’t freaking out at that point because I usually don’t freak about things until something bad actually happens and I hadn't had any symptoms of miscarriage. On Monday we had an ultrasound and I could tell that it wasn’t good. The OB told us that it was an anembryonic pregnancy cause by chromosomal abnormalities early on. I had pregnancy hormones and there was a placenta and embryonic sac that measured 8 weeks, but the sac was empty because the embryo didn’t development. She reassured us that it wasn’t a result of something we did and we couldn’t do anything to prevent it. It was devastating and shocking news, especially since my first pregnacy was sucessful. Nature is so cruel. I had all the pregnancy symptoms, but no baby. It made me felt, well, empty. We were very sad and still are, but we didn’t feel a huge sense of loss, partly because we didn’t lose an actual baby. Also, with Max, the pregnancy didn’t sink in until I saw the fetus this pregnancy hadn’t sunk in yet. I can’t imagine how devastating it is for this to happen during the first pregnancy. I’m very optimistic about our chances of conceiving again since it was really easy this last time. My OB said that we have fertility on our side, as evidenced by our first baby. It made me really appreciate my sweet little boy, who was super happy to see me when I picked him up from daycare on Monday and didn’t whine at all the whole day. It’s as if he knew I was going through a rough time and that he should take it easy on me.

After diagnosis, the OB recommended that I have a D&C since I hadn’t miscarried naturally already, and recommended doing it on Wednesday or Thursday. I’m still amazed at how fast medical decisions are made and treatments are done. I agreed to do the D&C because I felt that it’d help me heal faster emotionally and I just wanted to put this behind us asap so that we can try again sooner. I definitely wasn’t looking forward it to though. My OB explained the procedure to me, which I couldn’t really pay attention to since I was still processing a lot in my head. She said that she’d give me my old frenemy pitocin and anti biotics, which reminded me of my c-section. I’m getting sick of being poked and prodded. I made the appt for Thursday, but I couldn’t eat or sleep on Monday because I was stressing about the procedure, to the point where I only got three hours of sleep at night. I rescheduled for Wednesday because I couldn’t imagine another day of anxiety. On Tuesday, some of my pregnancy symptoms were already gone, probably because psychologically, I knew I wasn't really pregnant. I wasn't hungry all the time anymore and I didn't have to go to the bathroom as much. The D&C itself wasn’t bad. It was minor surgery, nothing compared to a c-section, but I had to be put under, which why I think I was stressing so much. It’s just such a weird and scary concept. The anesthesiologist met with us right before the procedure and said “I’m going to give you a little cocktail so you go to sleep… the Michael Jackson stuff. Don’t worry though. We’re professionals and we’ll monitor you the whole time.” That gave me and Hubby a nervous chuckle. And surely enough, all I remember was getting wheeled into the OR, the anesthesiologist asking if I felt sleepy and I said no, but I climbed onto the table and felt it immediately. They put some monitors and an oxygen mask on me and I was out.

I woke up in the recovery room with the mask still on and just felt groggy. The procedure only takes 20 minutes and I was in recovery for about an hour and then went home. I didn’t experience much pain at all, just some grogginess afterwards. I’m doing an abbreviated “reh zhi”, that Chinese recovery thing since they believe that having a miscarriage is like childbirth, but I’m definitely not missing out on Max’s first Halloween with trick-or-treating, so I’m going to venture out. Besides, I think the reh zhi just makes me more depressed, like it did after I had Max. I hate being confined and having no control or say over things. My OB warned us about having something similar to the baby blues since all the pregnancy hormones leave the body and I’m just bracing myself. So far I think I’m doing well. I did clear all of my work meetings. I was reluctant to and planning on going to work the next day, which the OB said was fine. But damn it, I’m going to put myself ahead of work for once. I’m just resting and taking it easy, which is something about the reh zhi I agree with.

I’m finding that almost everyone I know who was pregnant has had some kind of complication either with the pregnancy or childbirth. I think that’s why Chinese people don’t wait until the second trimester to announce their pregnancies and miscarriages aren’t viewed as such a devastating event. It’s more common than you think. I’m glad that have the support of my friends and family, especially those who know what I’ve gone through. And I’m starting to truly appreciate what a miracle it really is to have a child.

10/1/09

I’m 6.5 weeks pregnant! Hubby and I are very excited that we are going to have another baby! In a way, I still can’t believe it’s happening. I guess this is how I felt when I was pregnant the first time too. Physically, I know it’s happening. When I was 3 weeks pregnant, I started having all the symptoms. I was bloated, moody, tired, and I felt nauseous. Good thing, or else that would have been a very bad case of PMS! Now I’m still feeling the same. I’m much more tired now than the first time, to the point where I have no energy and just need to lie down or take a nap. I think it’s partly because I’m chasing after a toddler all day! I’m also waking up early for no reason. I wake up around 5:00 or 6:30 but I just go back to sleep if I don’t go to the bathroom. I figured I was fully rested for about 4 months since Max started sleeping consistently 4 months ago. Now I won’t be fully rested for another 27 months or so.

After taking the third pregnancy test (don’t ever take a generic drug store brand test, they aren’t very clear) I was really happy I found out I was pregnant. Then I started to worry. I felt sad for Max since he only had 9 more months before he’d had to share his parent’s affection with someone else. I vowed to make the next 9 months the best for him. I also worried about adding another person to our household; all of the added pressures of having a family of four instead of just three. I’m sure this is a natural feeling and we’ll be ok. I was happy though that he was going to have a sibling so that he wouldn’t be alone. I wonder how Max will react to the baby. He’s probably going to think at first “Ooh, a baby! Ok, why is this baby still here? It’s spending the night??? Wait a minute…”

I must say that the feelings and attitudes are different this time around. The first time, I tracked my ovulation and I was very calculated. This time it just happened. I had wanted to wait so that Max was a couple of months older so that it’d be easier with a more mature toddler and a newborn, but Hubby was worried that we’d have trouble conceiving since I wasn’t getting any younger, so better to be safe than sorry. There was no trouble at all! I’m not reading the pregnancy books every night like I used to and not obsessing over things. It’s much more relaxing this time around.

There’s something to be said about familiarity. I ended up going to the same OB. Even though she didn’t tell me that Max was a big baby, she thought that I’d deliver early, and she wasn’t at my delivery (can’t blame her, she was on vacation), I think she’s good, especially because she reassures me. I’ve also talked with other patients of hers who preferred her over other OBs. Choosing her means we’ll be at the same hospital again, but this time at least we know what to expect and we can head off problems before they occur. I know the next kid will be jaundice, so he/she will be in the tanning booth right off the bat.

What I am not looking forward too is the delivery. My OB said that I’d only have a 13% chance of a successful vaginal delivery because of the first unsuccessful try. And since Max was a big baby, she recommended a second c-section because it’d be a lot safer. No arguments here. I’m hoping though that the second c-section and recovery won’t be so bad since I won’t be spent from labor and won’t be going back and forth to the NICU.

The due date is May 23. We get to choose the birthday, so maybe we’ll do it closer to mine so that the baby will have a birthday on a holiday, like the rest of our family! The baby will be born in the year of the tiger, and supposedly, if it’s a girl, she’s going to have a very strong personality. Polar opposite of me? =P.

2009-10-07T17:51:00.000-07:00

Last week I went to Columbus OH for work. I wasn’t too excited to go there since I usually go to Vegas or Denver to visit the P family, but this time I wasn’t able to choose my destination. There’s not much to do in Columbus, but surprisingly, this was my third time going there. I had spent a whole summer there when I was 5 because my Grandma took my brother and I there to stay with our Aunt since my parents took a trip to Asia. (I can’t believe my Grandma was able to take us there with no problems since she didn’t speak English and there are no direct flights to Columbus.). I went there again when my mom and dad took my brother and me on a road trip around the east coast and we started in Columbus.

Ok, I’ll be a bay area snob and say that I can’t imagine living in Columbus. There’s not much there to do and pretty much life is centered around high school and college football. I can’t imagine how my cousins grew up there (My uncle was a professor at Ohio State University). But I must say that there is one thing that Columbus has that we don’t, and that is White Castle.

I had White Castle for the first time when I was five. I remember the little burgers being so good, they were juicy, flavorful, and small, which was great for a five year old. They were always hot and so tasty and they practically melted in your mouth. After watching Saturday Night Fever, Harold and Kumar, and some Food Network shows, I just craved them more. Even though you can buy the sliders at supermarkets here, they just aren’t the same.

I had forgotten that White Castle is in Columbus and my eyes lit up when I saw one while I was driving. I couldn’t wait to go. The people I went to Columbus with last week had no interest in going to White Castle and they didn’t think I was even serious that I wanted to go. I had finally decided that I’d go myself and asked the front desk where I stayed about the closest, safest White Castle. They actually said that there aren’t any really safe locations in Columbus, and I think they were right since the one I drove by looked kinda sketchy. The only other one I passed by was near the office, 15 minutes away from the hotel. So I just let it go. But now I can’t stop thinking about it! I need to go there once again and hopefully not be disappointed since I could have completely different tastes now then what I had back when I was a kid.

I bet this is what mid-westerners feel when they come out here and eat an It’s It. Haha.

2009-09-14T16:40:00.000-07:00

Max can:

1. Throw his trash away in the trash can.

2. Put his dirty clothes in the hamper.

3. Pick up his toys or anything else he dumps on the floor if we say "clean up."

4. Sweep the floor (but not very well =P)

I hope he continues this through his teenage years!

To Bowl Cut or Not to Bowl Cut

2009-08-27T16:22:00.000-07:00

I just gave Max another hair cut. It was his third or fourth ever. It was getting long and starting to cover his ears and touching his eyebrows, which is when I know he’s due for a haircut. But whenever he gets a haircut, his grandmothers chide me, “Why did you cut his hair??? Don’t cut it so short!!! He’s cuter with longer hair…hair like a girl” (Keep in mind that last sentence is coming from a Chinese grandmother.) I can give him just a little trim and it’s met by protests. Even Hubby doesn’t want me to cut his hair.

I can’t say I disagree that he is cuter with longer hair; I just don’t know how to style it other than a bowl cut, or something like it. That’s look that the people want! Can you imagine him with a buzz cut? I’ve tried using clippers before and he was afraid of them. So it’s even harder to achieve an even cut since he doesn’t stay still when I go at it with scissors. One side is always longer than the other since I let him play with water in the bathtub while I cut and he’s doesn’t face forward, so I spend the next couple of days trying to fix it. And to avoid a bowl looking cut, I try to layer a bit. Even if I part it to one side, his hair just falls forward.

His more clean cut days…

When a bowl cut works for him...going 10 mph on a kiddie ride with the wind in his hair

His hippie days….

18 Months

2009-07-31T17:11:00.000-07:00

Max had his appt with the Ped a couple of weeks ago and his stats were 33.5 in tall, 49.1cm, and 25 lbs 14 oz, which was about the 88^thpercentile, but only 50^th percentile for weight. Max’s growth is starting to slow down, but he’s still tall. The Ped wasn’t worried about his weight because he’s been walking and very active. He’s so skinny now though! No longer the chubs that he once was. He still has some drumsticks though, hehe.

I always wondered what 18 months was like since it seems like a big milestone. Here are some of his recent developments:

After he started walking, it’s like he moved on and focused on verbal communication. In two weeks he learned 8 or so words! He’s even learned two word phrases like no more and all done. He also understands much more too. The other day I asked “Where’s your milk?” and then he went to look for his milk cup and led me to it (way on the other side of the house). Two way communication, what advancement! He definitely prefers speaking English to Mandarin though.

Now that he’s mastered walking, he’s started to run! He’s not too fast yet though so I can still catch him, whew!

Maybe that all of the walking/running is wearing him out during the day, because he sleeps 11.5 hours consistently at night and his daily nap is about 2-3 hours. Much better than the 10 hours total he used to do. (Fingers crossed that this lasts!)

He is feeding himself more and more and can even eat corn on the cob by himself. He’s still really messy and after awhile, he becomes impatient and uses his hands. Why not? It’s just easier. Corn is one of his favorites along with watermelon, grapes, and cottage cheese. He loves fruit! Meat and veggies, not so much. His tastes keep changing though. He used to love string cheese but not anymore. I’m just happy he hasn’t hit a food jag where he only eats one thing and refuses to eat anything else.

He can throw pretty well overhand, which is pretty advanced for his age. I say he’s in training for the Major Leagues =)

He now laughs at what he watches on TV. He’ll laugh at Ni Hao Kai-Lan when the characters make silly faces.

He’s trying to learn how to jump. He’ll crouch down and the spring back up, but not catch any air. He also will stand at the top of steps and leap (or fall, really) into my arms. He’s a dare devil already!

His molars have come in and he has a few more to go. You can tell that he’s miserable because he screams in pain during the night and wakes up really grumpy and cranky =( But now he’s able to eat new foods with his newfound chewing ability.

His expressions are hilarious. He’s very entertaining and there’s hardly a dull moment when we’re with him. Although he’s shy at first when he’s in a group of new people, he warms up pretty quick and does the “it’s hot” bit to get some laughs. (See Hubby’s blog for video.)

He doesn’t test me as much anymore, so I’m hoping that means he’s learning what’s acceptable behavior and what’s not. He does have some tantrums sometimes and when he does something really bad, we give him a stern stare down with a “NO! or BAD!” and he knows he did something wrong since we mean business. He looks down and gives a little frown and we have to really hold in our giggles because it’s so cute when he does it.

We also recently went on our first vacation. We spent 5 days in Vegas with the grandparents. His first flight wasn’t that bad. He did have a meltdown, but it wasn’t long (at least to me anyway. I don’t know how everyone around us felt =P). He really wanted to walk around and explore, so it was hard containing him to our row. I think things would have been much better if we had his car seat and strapped him in so that he was forced to sit. The flight back was great though. The flight was during his nap time so he fell asleep right after take-off and woke up during landing. While in Vegas, we visited the aquarium, the children’s museum (yes there is one in Vegas) and went swimming, which is almost everything you can do with a toddler in Vegas and 107 degree heat. I think all of the new experiences and sights really contributed to his development, which really makes me want to a lot more new things with him. One I thing I learned was that having a harness (oh, let’s just call it a leash) is a good idea in public places because Max sometimes refused to be strapped in the stroller and he would just take off away from me. This is what parents had warned me about. Stupid me didn’t have time to buy one before we left, so I had to chase him down a lot! On a side note about our vacation, I actually won in Vegas. Second time ever! And it was great seeing a pregnant H.J., especially since I haven’t received any updates or pics (ehem, ehem….=P)

2009-06-19T14:06:00.000-07:00

I have to say that being a parent of a toddler is quite challenging. Although at the time I didn’t realize it, taking care of an infant was much easier than an active toddler. I find myself being in a test of wills with Max constantly. I suppose I should encourage him exerting his independence since its normal at this stage, but man, Max tests me a lot. For example:

Max started rejecting pureed foods a couple of months ago and demanded finger foods. It was challenging to find new acceptable foods that he could gum since he only had front teeth.

At first Max didn’t object to playing in his play yard that takes up half of our dining room. It was great to put him there when we needed a safe place for him when left unsupervised. Now he won’t have any part of it and starts protesting since putting him in the play yard means that we’re not giving him attention.

Max started refusing to sit in his highchair. At first I just thought that he didn’t want to eat. I had contemplated not feeding him, since that was the advice I got (they won’t starve), but I didn’t want him to be cranky for the grandparents or at daycare from being hungry. I decided to try sitting him in his booster seat and he had no objections. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to eat, he just didn’t want to sit in the high chair, which I don’t understand since the high chair looks more comfy to me.

A couple of weeks ago, Max started refusing to eat again. He refused foods that he gladly ate before. I thought about letting him go hungry again, but didn’t. In the midst of my frustration and desperation, I put the rice bowl in front of him with his fork and just sat there. He started feeding himself! So the problem was he wanted to self-feed. Now I let him feed everything himself everything, even noodle soup, which is very messy. I think he must self-feed at daycare since he started this behavior a little after daycare stared.

Max now prefers to walk instead of crawling, and now he will walk AWAY from me. This is what other mothers had warned me about, since once they start walking away from you, you’ll always be trying to catch them. They told me I’d start longing for those days when I could put Max down and he’d stay put. Just wait until he starts running. Leash or no leash?

I don’t know how many times a day I say no or “not in the mouth!” He likes to defy me, especially when he plays in Pocky’s food and bowls. Ahhh!

I must say that I had much more patience during infancy. At the same time though, it’s great to see him learn and go through this period of self discovery as he and I both realize that he’s not a baby anymore. Interacting with him now is so much fun. I’m hoping that the terrible two’s aren’t going to be that bad though!

2009-06-02T13:34:00.000-07:00

Yahoo 360 is shutting down. (They also shut down my favorite travel site, which was farechase.) So I downloaded my blog pre-blogger and I decided to save it here. It's interesting to read these posts from my 20's sans baby.

AUTHOR: jeannellin
TITLE: Blogger here I come...
DATE: 07/15/2006 01:14:46
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Alright peeps, I've decided to go to Blogger. My options are still underwater, so to google I will go!

www.jennaychow.blogspot.com

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AUTHOR: jeannellin
TITLE: 360?
DATE: 06/20/2006 12:47:48
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Alright, time for me to call it out. 93 visitors and 760+ pages views...who are you??? I only have a handful of friends who have linked to me. So, who's looking at my 360 site? I'm just curious. I know some of you read it and then send me or even tell me comments, which defeats the pupose of the comment section, but I digress. I wonder if I should make the move to another blogging site. I still have to support the Y! stock price though =P. Faithful Y! member since 1997.

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COMMENT:
AUTHOR:
DATE: 06/22/2006 20:58:10
haha, isn't that weird? ppl from all over the world visit my blog, and i have no clue how they got there (i have a site meter). but then again, i land on random ppl's blogs when i search for things sometimes. i'm not really a fan of 360, to be honest... :P
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COMMENT:
AUTHOR: k9999999999
DATE: 06/24/2006 09:41:52
I got nothing else to do! When you get tired of babysitting, you've gotta do something else. That big number shows how popular you are. I gues... right? heheeh what's my number?
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AUTHOR: jeannellin
TITLE: Out with the old. In with the new.
DATE: 06/19/2006 14:54:36
STATUS: publish
BODY:

For fear of future employers googling me in the future and finding my blog, I'll never comment on work. Except now, heh. After all that's said and done, I'm glad that I took the job at Yahoo because I've learn more than I had working at two other jobs in a 5 year span. People say that working at Yahoo for 1 year is like working at another company for 3 years, or 7 dog years. I totally feel it. It was a good experience, but it's time to move on to something better for me...Movies galore! yay!

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AUTHOR: jeannellin
TITLE: Smug
DATE: 06/14/2006 21:41:40
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Hubby drives a hybrid and I drive a SUV. Isn't there something wrong here?

Hubby says that ever since he got his Prius, he's been getting cut off a lot. I thought I was the only person that couldn't stand trendy yuppie hybrid drivers...haha. Just kidding! Hubby is not a yuppie though, no no. Nor is he green either since I'm the one that takes care of all the recycling around the house. He just likes it cuz its cool and he can stick it to the man by not depending on gas as much. It's the best car for the gadget lover, like him. But I just saw the South Park episode that makes fun of hybrid drivers in San Francisco...so true! heh. That's hubby with his black plastic gucci eyeglasses.

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COMMENT:
AUTHOR:
DATE: 06/16/2006 16:55:34
LMAO...too funny. whit and i both still can't believe he drives a prius. but hey, whatever makes you happy!!
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AUTHOR: jeannellin
TITLE: Madonna, Madonna
DATE: 06/04/2006 18:19:52
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Genius is sampling an ABBA song to create your own disco song.

Yes, I'll admit it. I'm a big Madonna fan and when ever she comes around, I can't resist going her concert. Hubby got me ticktes for my b-day. It was cool! How could I miss a Madonna show devoted to disco music? Not as dope as the first show I saw of hers in 2001, but it's still impressive to see her dance around and sing without lip syncing. Eh, she was out of tune a lot of the time, but still good. She puts on such entertaining shows. They're like theatrical productions. The $365 tickets were all worth it when she launched into her disco set and discofied some of her old songs, heh. She even reenacted the dancing scene from Saturday Night Fever. I had heard that Madonna doesn't like AC in arenas and it's true. At first I thought it wasn't that bad, but once the whole arena started jumping up and down...eck. At least there weren't that many WTF moments that would have weirded hubby out and send him running, heh.

Let's hope for everyone's sake that she won't tour again, cuz I think I'd have to see her again if she does. ;)

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COMMENT:
AUTHOR:
DATE: 06/06/2006 16:21:06
$365 each ticket???!!! i am so addicted to "confessions on a dance floor," i think it's the best of her more recent albums (in the past decade or so).
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COMMENT:
AUTHOR:
DATE: 06/06/2006 16:24:04
Oh,no $365 total. Still a lot in my book.
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COMMENT:
AUTHOR:
DATE: 06/06/2006 16:24:05
Oh,no $365 total. Still a lot in my book.
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AUTHOR: jeannellin
TITLE: I knew it!
DATE: 05/24/2006 22:00:18
STATUS: publish
BODY:
I called it! Taylor Hicks! I said it during the auditions. I should have betted in Vegas =P

When will American Idol cease to be entertaining?

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COMMENT:
AUTHOR: k9999999999
DATE: 05/25/2006 11:05:25
It's not the same after Kelly Clarkson.
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AUTHOR: jeannellin
TITLE: Softball
DATE: 05/18/2006 23:13:54
STATUS: publish
BODY:
I was asked to to play softball at Twincreeks, so I played last night and boy do I suck! I used to be good, if I do say so myself. I have a good arm and my batting average was .320...in highschool. I haven't played in a real game since college and I told the team that I hadn't played in a very, very long time, but they still needed a girl or else they wouldn't be albe to play so I went. I had one error, forgot how to play infield, and no hits. At least I drew a walk and got on base. I was so disappointed with myself because softball had always been my sport. Now I'm determined to get better again. It's on my list of self-fulfillment to do's, along with kickboxing, learning how to tap dance, and Chinese classes, heh.

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AUTHOR: jeannellin
TITLE: Crash
DATE: 05/06/2006 19:10:16
STATUS: publish
BODY:
I saw finally saw the movie Crash last night. (I'm a little behind on my movies.) I think it's a good movie, but I don't understand how it won best picture over Brokeback Mountain. I think all the controversy over why Brokeback didn't win was valid.

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COMMENT:
AUTHOR: k9999999999
DATE: 05/07/2006 01:13:56
Brokeback didn't win because it sucks! :-p Crash is way too dramatized but it's one of those movies you can't help but to agree.
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COMMENT:
AUTHOR:
DATE: 05/09/2006 19:44:10
still haven't seen brokeback mountain... but i really liked crash cuz it has a bunch of little subplots that all come together in the end. :)
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COMMENT:
AUTHOR:
DATE: 05/10/2006 08:36:44
Watching Crash right before going to LA wasn't a great idea. haha
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AUTHOR: jeannellin
TITLE: Korea!
DATE: 04/26/2006 21:30:49
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Things I learned during my trip to Seoul, South Korea:

Seoul is jammed packed with skyscrapers like other big cities in Asia, but itâ€™s not as fast paced or crowded, which is pleasant.
Working in a foreign country is a challenge because of the language barrier. Although everyone one at the office spoke English, reading contracts in Korean was tough man.
Flat metal chopsticks make it even harder for me to use them.
Seoul has sandstorms with sand blown in from China.
Koreans like to eat meat! I had BBQ four times in two weeks! And they eat a lot. Tons of side dishes, but everyone is skinny.
Seoul gets cold. It was colder than a Bay Area winter. In fact, I donâ€™t think Iâ€™ve been that cold in Asia. I canâ€™t imagine what itâ€™s like when it's snowing.
There are cool cell phones and flat screens everywhere, which we probably wonâ€™t see for another 3 years.
Being bilingual is such a plus. I understood a few Korean words since they sound the same in Mandarin and I understood some of the tourist announcements at attractions. (Fact: the words for â€œlibraryâ€ sound the same in Mandarin, Cantonese, Korean, and Japanese, go figure)
There's only handful of foreign cars. Everyone drives a Kia or Hyundai.
Hotel food is not always safe.

I saw a t-shirt once that said, "South Korea's got Seoul" hehe.

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COMMENT:
AUTHOR:
DATE: 04/30/2006 11:30:25
i hate those metal chopsticks, and the metal bowls! youch! i think all the korean restaurants have a lot of meat cuz it's gained so much popularity, but in general koreans eat mostly veggies and seafood since it's so abundent. and yeah, it gets REALLY cold in the winters and REALLY hot/humid in the summers. yuck.

and they have 8 MP camera phones in korea! what?! i totally want a phone from korea.
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AUTHOR: jeannellin
TITLE: Vegas Baby!
DATE: 04/05/2006 21:52:39
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Hubby and I celebrated our first anniversary in Vegas. We couldn't decide where to go because it's not the ideal time to go anywhere in the beginning of April. We had this problem when we were deciding where to go for our honeymoon. So of course, we chose our favorite destination by default. I love Vegas! I've been going there since my parents packed the family up in the car for LA-LV road trips when I was little. Since I've turned 21, I've averaged 3 trips to Vegas a year. The first glimpse of the strip from the plane always makes me smile. Even the seeing the video monitors above the baggage carousels that promote new shows makes me excited for what's to come.

Every time I go to Vegas I try to do something new, which actually isnâ€™t that hard because there's so much to do. This trip was packed with new things to do because I didn't want us to get distracted by the tables! We saw Avenue Q, which was really funny. Even Hubby admitted that he liked this musical! Even though it stars puppets, it's definitely not for the kiddies. We visited the new Hooters hotel and casino for the curiosity factor. Yes, the casino is exactly like a Hooters restaurant with the same decor and Hooters girls as dealers. I also got a hot rock a massage at the JW Marriott Spa. It was my first time to that spa, which was really nice but I didn't have enough time to take advantage of the free classes they offer. I never thought that a massage can feel any better until I got a hot rock massage, which makes it ten times better! We also when hiking at Red Rock Canyon. I could spend a whole day there. It looks like a great place to learn how to rock climb, but only when itâ€™s not blazing hot in the desert. To celebrate our anniversary, we went to the Top of the World, the revolving restaurant at the top of Stratosphere. It's one of the top ten things to do in Vegas. It sounds cheesy, but it's really cool because you have such a great view of the mountains and the Strip. It takes about an hour and 20 min for a full revolution.

There was also another first for me this past weekend. I actually left Vegas with winnings! Every time I've gone to Vegas Iâ€™ve always lost. You'd think I'd learn my lesson, huh? But this trip, Hubby and I were on a roll and we won enough to pay for our plane tickets! My unlucky streak has been broken! :)

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COMMENT:
AUTHOR:
DATE: 04/06/2006 01:25:16
AMEN!
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COMMENT:
AUTHOR:
DATE: 04/06/2006 21:28:10
yea! sounds like you guys had a GREAT trip, and happy 1st anniversary! my how that year flies by... :)
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AUTHOR: jeannellin
TITLE: Cupcakes!
DATE: 03/29/2006 12:40:12
STATUS: publish
BODY:

This blog is really cool. Lycee cupcakes? Thai ice tea cupcakes??? Impressive!

http://chockylit.blogspot.com

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AUTHOR: jeannellin
TITLE: TomKat!!!
DATE: 03/21/2006 22:33:06
STATUS: publish
BODY:

I saw Tom Cruise today ! He came to talk at work as part of our influential speaker series. I had to wait in line since 9:30 because it was in our cafeteria and there was limited seating. The event was supposed to start at 10:30, but Tom showed up an hour late because he flew his own plane into SJ and he was delayed due to the weather here. Mr.Big Shot movie star. Who does he think he is...keeping the whole company waiting! *hymph* But he apologized, so it's all good. We didn't expect to see Katie Holmes, but she was there too. She is huge! She didn't look that great either, haha. I still don't understand her appeal. They kissed on stage and said I love you too each other...eck! He talked about his hobbies (flying planes) and doing stunts and why he likes to make movies and how he got his start. The guy is really passionate about movies and seems sincere about it. Boy, does he like to laugh and laugh how only he can. But it was pretty cool. Our CEO joked about couches so Tom got up on his chair. No talk of Scientology though and those *rumors* of course. So, no he didn't reveal his real persona, heh. I still think he's a good actor. We saw a retrospective of his career and I realized that I've seen almost all of his movies. He shook hands with people afterward I got some video of TomKat. I was about two feet away from them. They're both about my height, heh. I'd post pics and video, but 360 sucks and I can't! Note to Yahoo, improve 360!

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AUTHOR: jeannellin
TITLE: Home Cookin'
DATE: 03/19/2006 23:16:40
STATUS: publish
BODY:
I finally sucessfully replicated one of my favorite dishes that my Mom makes. It's a thick noodle soup (da lu mein) that I consider as Chinese comfort food. Everytime I try to make one of my Mom's dishes, it doesn't quite come out right. But I must admit, my noodles were pretty good and I was pretty proud of myself. Slowly but surely, I'm becoming domesticated!

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AUTHOR: jeannellin
TITLE: Poker
DATE: 03/13/2006 21:30:44
STATUS: publish
BODY:
Played poker over the weekend with my old co-wokers. It was great to see them again and hang out, but after all the friendly trash talking about each other's poker skills, I was a bit nervous. Especially since it was a room with all auditors, haha, and it's makes me nervous playing with new people. Good thing I have a pretty good poker face =) And I won (by pure luck, I'm sure) and so did Hubby. Now I have some ammo for the next round of disses ;)

I wonder if I'll ever have the guts to play in a casino. I think my hands would shake too due to nervousness. Maybe I'll blame it on how cold the room is, like I always do =P

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AUTHOR: jeannellin
TITLE: Bulldog Puppies!
DATE: 03/13/2006 17:41:54
STATUS: publish
BODY:
Is there anything cuter than a bulldog puppy???
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AUTHOR: jeannellin
TITLE: Three Websites I Dig Right Now:
DATE: 03/09/2006 16:59:32
STATUS: publish
BODY:
farechase.yahoo.com â€“ Searches a bunch of travel and airline sites for the lowest price all at once. I love watching the price get lower and lower, and then lowerâ€¦ btw, I think farechase is better than sidestep.com, which does the same thing. I still check both though just so I have the absolute lowest price, which kinda defeats the purpose of not having to compare different sites. Oh well.

flickr.com â€“ Lots of cool and interesting pictures. If you want to see a pic of something, they have it.

zappos.com â€“ Free returns on shoes and purses and they made good on their lowest price guarantee. Iâ€™ve ordered two things from the site and they came within two days!

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AUTHOR: jeannellin
TITLE: Denver, CO
DATE: 03/06/2006 22:49:29
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Back from Denver! It was a much needed break after working long hours for 8 months. I was overdue for a vacation. Old rommie and her hubby moved there a couple of months ago and I wanted to visit before the snow season ends =). It was great to visit them to see what they've been describing to us and to just spend time hanging out again.

We went boarding at Breckenridge, which is a really nice resort. For a $75 lift ticket, Iâ€™d sure hope itâ€™d be nice! The runs were long and the mountain is huge! The town of Breckenridge is a really cute ski village. The cruel ironyâ€¦Tahoe is being pounded by snowstorms for two weeks straight while it hasnâ€™t snow much in the Denver area lately. The conditions werenâ€™t too bad though and I was excited to board somewhere other than Tahoe, which was on my list of things to do before I die. (Seeing the pyramids and the Acropolis are next! =) Best of all it took less than two hours to get there, even in traffic.

Denver is pretty cool. Hubby and I noticed that people there are very nice and friendly, which was a bit eerie to us since weâ€™re not used to it being from the Bay Area, heh. The houses in the suburbs are BIG and nice. There are breweries everywhere, which is great for the beer lover. The scenery is the best. How can you beat the Rockies as your backdrop?

We had a lot of fun (a big thanks to the gracious hosts!), but the break was too short. I actually got sick right when I got back. Something I ate at the airport, the most turbulent flight I ever had, and me teetering on the edge of being sick for the last three months all hit me at once. So no, I did not call in sick just to extend my vacation! :P It was also my first sick day in 8 months.

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COMMENT:
AUTHOR:
DATE: 03/07/2006 08:07:54
it's your body's way of telling you it wants to be back in denver. :) sorry to hear you're not feeling well! i'm really glad you guys made the trip out here!! it's been so warm lately, it's hard to believe it might snow tomorrow! what?!
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AUTHOR: jeannellin
TITLE: Sanrio
DATE: 02/27/2006 10:01:54
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Itâ€™s no secret that I love Sanrio, even in my late 20â€™s. The love affair started when I was 5. My cousins and I used to go the Kitty nâ€™ Friends Sanrio store in the same mall where we had ice skating lessons. Icees and Sanrio after ice skating, you canâ€™t beat that! I loved getting stickers and cool pencil cases with buttons that opened hidden compartments. My favorite character was Tuxedo Sam, but I liked them allâ€¦My Melody, Hello Kitty, the Little Twin Stars, Robby Rabbit. The list goes on. I still have my Hello Color Kitty and Sam that change color under hot and cold water.

The love affair died down for awhile in my pre-teens, but was then rekindled in high school when Keroppi became popular, thus ushering in the Pochacco and Peckle era as well. Many a dollar here and there was spent on stationary that we used to write notes during classes to friends.

Alas, I bid farewell to Sanrio again until one day I was at a Chinese market a couple of years ago and saw some Hello Kitty candy with a cute little Hello Kitty Charm dressed in a school girl outfit. I thought, why not? $1.19 candy canâ€™t hurt. Little did I know that the harmless charm was the catalyst for sordid phase of my affair with Sanrio that has almost become, shall I say, an obsession.

Many people who hit their quarter-life crisis look to nostalgia for comfort as a way to remember simpler times. I read an article about this syndrome. This is why the Care Bears and Cabbage Patch Kids made a comeback. I realized I was one of those people, but for me, it was Sanrio. Sanrio has even recognized this phenomenon and started its limited edition collection and baby line because of it.

My interest was peaked soon after I got the charm. I visited Sanrioâ€™s website and saw a cute plush Hello Kitty. It was unusual because it was Hello Kitty hugging her twin sister, Mimi which symbolized the Gemini sign. Well, Iâ€™m a Gemini, so of course I fell for it, although, I didnâ€™t buy it at that time because I thought I could resist. After that, my friend sent me an eBay link of a Hello Kitty dressed as a panda. Well, pandas are my favorite animals and Hello Kitty dressed as another animal is irresistibly cute. So naturally, I fell for it and won the (pricey) auction. After that, it was downhill from there. Eventually, a year after Iâ€™d seen the Gemini twins, I found it on an auction since it was no longer selling in stores and won it for three times the retail price. Foolish, yes, but how can you put a price on joy? =P I couldnâ€™t resist Hello Kitty snowboarding, so I got a couple of those. Then I started getting Hello Kitties and other Sanrio stuff as gifts so the collection grew. I like unusual Kitties. I have one dressed as the devil and ones that are tan in grass skirts. I melt when I see Hello Kitty with her boyfriend Daniel, so I had my wedding caked topped with them dressed in a tux and wedding gown. I even have books on the history of the company its products.

In the midst of the madness, my dream came true. I had read about Puroland, the indoor Sanrio theme park near Tokyo, when I was 10 years old. To think, a theme park based on my favorite characters! In 2003 I took a trip to Tokyo, which was amazing. Of course, I scheduled a trip out to Puroland. It was such a trip being there. I walked through Hello Kittyâ€™s house and took a picture with Hello Kittyâ€¦life sized! I went on the Boat Trip, which is Sanrioâ€™s version of Itâ€™s a Small World After All. I even saw a Hello Kitty parade. Best of all, the worldâ€™s largest Sanrio store is there, so I spent hours shopping, amazed while browsing though all things Sanrio that I had never seen before in the US.

After visiting the motherland, I heard about the Sanrio outdoor theme park in Fukuoka, on the southern tip of Japan. Think of it! Hello Kitty roller coasters! I didnâ€™t even contemplate going there, especially since I didnâ€™t even know how I would get there, until I heard about the Hello Kitty airplane from EVA air that flies from Taipei to Fukuoka and offers packaged trips. Craziness! Somedayâ€¦

http://evakitty.evaair.com/

For now, I can say that the affair is coming under wraps again. I realized that I have no more room for Sanrio stuff and, although I wonâ€™t say it was a waste of money, Iâ€™ve spent enough. Plus, Iâ€™m not getting any younger =P. Occasionally, I canâ€™t resist and Iâ€™ll give in a get something. However, Iâ€™ve learned that Hello Kitty will eventually rear her cute head again and the affair will once again bloom.

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AUTHOR: jeannellin
TITLE: Yahoo! Answers
DATE: 02/22/2006 15:44:45
STATUS: publish
BODY:
I'm additcted to Yahoo Answers! Everytime I log in, I can't stop asking or answering questions. Although, I'm only good at answering questions about Vegas, heh. I wonder what people will get with the points they earn from participating.
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COMMENT:
AUTHOR: Abhyudaya
DATE: 02/26/2006 11:18:38
Hi! I am an addict too. You might wish to Join the group of Y! A Addicts. Its called Yahoo! AnswerholicsAnonymous.

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/AnswerholicsAnonymous/
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AUTHOR: jeannellin
TITLE: Boarding
DATE: 02/10/2006 12:56:21
STATUS: publish
BODY:

This is my 9^th year of boarding and itâ€™s been a great 9 years.

I still remember the first couple of painful trips when I was learning the basics. I loved it so much that I kept going even though the conditions were hard packed ice. (Later on I learned that itâ€™s just not as fun on ice, which prompted me to buy an SUV just so I could board while itâ€™s snowing.)

It was the best of times and the worst of times. I remember the time my friend and I fell off a lift, the gnarly 7 inch long bruise on my leg that took weeks to heal, and the spectacular spill I had when I fearlessly, and foolishly, tried my first jump at full speed. Iâ€™ll never forget how painful sleet feels when itâ€™s pelting you in the face as you make your way up and down a mountain during a thunderstorm. Long traffic jams and two cracked windshields didnâ€™t make the 6+ hour drives any better.

Despite the low lights, there were many highlights to keep me wanting more; the first time I turned on my toe edge. The first time I carved consistently, which felt like I was floating . The feeling of accomplishment when I first carved down a blue run, and then a black run. The first jump that I landed (I caught maybe 1 foot of air, but hey, it was something). The very first time I rode my own board. The time I broke in my second board. The time when I kept on going down the wrong path because I was lost, only to find out later that the path was a double black diamond (which qualifies me as a dbd boarder, heh). Iâ€™ll never forget how my body yearned for more.

Itâ€™s hard to give up one of my passions in life, but itâ€™s time.

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COMMENT:
AUTHOR:
DATE: 02/10/2006 13:22:54
awh. how sad. you dont have to quit hon.
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COMMENT:
AUTHOR:
DATE: 02/14/2006 09:39:08
why do you keep saying you have to quit??? i don't understand... maybe after you've boarded in the rockies, you'll change your mind. ;) i was watching the olympics last night, the women's halfpipe...those girls are crazy!!! i wish i learned earlier, and had more guts...halfpipe looks like soooo much fun!! til then, SSX will have to do. :)
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COMMENT:
AUTHOR: Derrick F
DATE: 02/22/2006 16:53:51
Wait...so are you still going this weekend? hehe

I had a pretty bad fall 2 weeks ago when I was going down a pretty steep slope (steep to me at least haha) and hit a bump that I wasn't ready for and flew forward...landed hard on my right shoulder and then on my chest/stomach/face. Felt like I had the wind knocked outta me, and couldn't breathe for a good minute and felt like throwing up. I admit I was kind of traumatized by it. Took a while for me to gather myself together, and then get up to make it back down. After that things were ok tho, and now I just want to get better. The main problem I have now is getting more used to going toe-side, and making my body parallel with the slope so I can try carving. I always end up just zigzagging back and forth. Don't fall as much, but then still takes me a while just to get down the slope...and the snow is still comfortable to sleep on after a day of boarding hehe.
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COMMENT:
AUTHOR:
DATE: 02/27/2006 09:40:43
D, I hope you have a helmet! Don't give up! It's going to get soooo much better.
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AUTHOR: jeannellin
TITLE: Entry for January 30, 2006
DATE: 01/30/2006 13:12:37
STATUS: publish
BODY:

My first job after college was at Arthur Andersen, who was Enron's outside auditor. Then I worked at PG&E, who went bankrupt because of Enron and Andersen. Now, I work on SOX because of Enron and Andersen. I see a pattern here...

This pretty much sums up what I've been doing for the past two years:

WASHINGTON (AFP) - The name Enron has become synonymous with greed and malfeasance in the wake of the far-reaching scandal that rocked the corporate world.

But the Enron affair, the most prominent in a wave of scandals at the end of the late 1990s economic boom, also triggered a crackdown that has sent a number of executives to prison, and led to tough reforms on corporate governance.

The trial of the fallen energy company's top two executives, Kenneth Lay and Jeffrey Skilling, is set to open in Houston, Texas on Monday, climaxing a probe into what was then the biggest collapse in US corporate history.

"What Enron stands for is multiple gatekeeper failure -- the board failed, the auditors failed, the outside law firm failed," said Thomas Dunfee, professor of business ethics at the University of Pennsylvania's Wharton School of Business.

"I think we learned that just having prestigious and good quality people in key positions is not enough. We have to pay attention to the kind of legal incentives that we provide."

The Enron case and the wave of scandals involving other companies including WorldCom, Tyco and others, led to a shift in public attitudes toward corporate misbehavior.

Some of those convicted of cooking the books were sentenced to hard time -- 25 years for example, for WorldCom's former chief executive Bernie Ebbers, amounting to an effective life sentence.

The wave of scandals also prompted Congress to pass the Sarbanes-Oxley reform that tightened oversight of auditors, stiffened penalties for errant executives and required greater accountability for financial statements from top corporate officers.

After Enron imploded and WorldCom collapsed, "we had a very intensive reaction from Congress," said Margaret Blair, a corporate governance specialist and law professor at Vanderbilt University.

Blair said that while some criticize the Sarbanes-Oxley law as an overreaction, "overall, it has ratcheted up the expectations on boards of directors and on inside and outside auditors" to prevent corporate misconduct.

"We're not seeing that many new cases any more, and that suggests people are tightening up controls," Blair said.

Columbia law professor John Coffee said tossing executives in prison has also sent a strong message.

"I think that general deterrence works well in the case of potential white-collar offenders," he said.

"I'm not saying that all these sentences are justified. But these are people very capable of calculating the pleasure-pain calculus and as a result I think we'll see far less of the Enron and WorldCom kind of misbehavior."

As for audit and accounting standards, Coffee and others said fixing the problem is more complex because Enron operated on the edge of the legal limit.

For example, Enron could legally transfer some 80 billion dollars in liabilities to special outside entities to get the losses off its books, but only ran afoul of the law because outsiders did not hold a three percent stake in the entities.

"Enron in its simplest form was a stark and vivid lesson that a company could comply with generally accepted accounting principles and totally deceive investors at the same time," said Coffee, who specializes in corporate governance and white-collar crime.

Coffee said the Sarbanes-Oxley law was a "substantial accomplishment" but added, "that still doesn't mean that a clever, manipulative manager cannot find a way to hide the truth."

Other analysts say Enron and the other scandals were a classic case of a scandal linked to an economic boom and bust.

"Part of the reason we had a rash of scandals all at the same time is that we had a market crash," Blair noted.

"If the market is going up, people don't notice it. When there is a crash, all of a sudden it makes the room for error a lot smaller. A lot of people lost money, and they were out for blood."

Alex Pollock, a scholar at the American Enterprise Institute, said the Enron-era scandals were not unlike those of the 1920s and 1930s that led to the establishment of US securities regulation, and others over subsequent decades.

"One of the things that happens is that when the pricing of investments gets wildly optimistic, people become willing to cut corners and engage in frauds and swindles," Pollock said.

"This also normally leads to an overreaction of the politicians and the regulators," he said, criticizing Sarbanes-Oxley for imposing large costs on companies that "far outweigh the benefits which are likely to arise from them."

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AUTHOR: jeannellin
TITLE: Chinese New Year
DATE: 01/26/2006 12:49:47
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Another holiday that me and and the hubby will have to choose which family to celebrate with. D'OH! It didn't even occur to me until now.

My house is a mess! I'm going to attempt to clean it so we won't have a year of messiness. haha. I think I've only sucessfully cleaned my room once in my adult life for Chinese new year. Now I have a whole house to clean!

And now that we're married, we have to start giving out the red envelopes!

Geez, Chinese New Year isn't that great for newlyweds, is it? =P

And remember, no fighting on new years day! That's the only superstition that I try to adhere to.

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AUTHOR: jeannellin
TITLE: Baking
DATE: 01/16/2006 11:45:52
STATUS: publish
BODY:

I've been baking a lot since the holidays because I finally have the space to do so and I wanted to start using the wedding gifts. I've baked about 3 cakes, two loaves of banana bread, a couple of batches of cookies, and made some waffles with the waffle iron. The kitchen-aid stand mixer is awesome! I didn't think I'd use it that much and I thought a $100+ mixer wasn't justifiable. I was wrong :). It totally takes away some of the pain in the prep and clean up. It's not just a status symbol collecting dust on the countertop! Love it!

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AUTHOR: jeannellin
TITLE: Brangelina
DATE: 01/12/2006 08:25:46
STATUS: publish
BODY:

My favorite actor and actress are now finally a confrmed couple.

Can you imagine having Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie as your parents??? I wonder what their kid will look like. Think of the genes this kid will inherit!

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AUTHOR: jeannellin
TITLE: Entry for January 04, 2006
DATE: 01/04/2006 12:40:56
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Japanese tapas restaurant next to a Japanese ktv...right in my neighborhood?!?! Must go try them soon.

http://www.gochifusiontapas.com/intro.html

http://www2.odn.ne.jp/gamba_karaoke/english/english_top.html

"According to some study, you consume about 50-60Kcal per one sing

which is equvalent to approximately 10 min walking. There are

some hospital in Japan, they use Karaoke for obesity treatment.

Since you breath(abdominal breathing for singing) well, you will take

oxygen and it will contribute your health."

Hmmm...

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COMMENT:
AUTHOR:
DATE: 01/13/2006 13:42:37
well if THAT were true, then i'd be anorexically thin...so i hardly believe that. too bad tho, i'd WAY rather sing than run to burn calories! :)

*joyce*
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AUTHOR: jeannellin
TITLE: Entry for January 03, 2006
DATE: 01/03/2006 12:57:21
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Happy New Year!

I should use my own company's products, right? So in support of the stock price, I'm starting a blog and trying out 360. Hey, a girl's gotta eat.

I'll post things from time to time. Wish I had more time...

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COMMENT:
AUTHOR:
DATE: 01/04/2006 08:40:22
yea, another blog to read! :) nice background... ;)
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COMMENT:
AUTHOR:
DATE: 01/04/2006 12:42:10
Not sure if I'll keep it up. We'll see!
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MAX IS WALKING!!!

2009-06-02T13:33:00.001-07:00

Max is finally walking! It took him 16 months and 29 days! We went to see a physical therapist at the advice of the Ped since it was recommended that he should walk by 18 months. We weren’t worried, but we could tell that Max would have lots more fun if he could start walking and frankly, I was getting tired of carrying him around. I was expecting that we’d get an appointment much later, but one was available the week I called, so we went to the first appointment and we were amazed! He did so much that we never knew he could, like walk while holding onto one of our hands and standing without holding onto something. And, he said “sheh sheh”, which is thank you in Mandarin, for the first time! I swear, that PT room is magical! But the PT was coaxing all of this out of him and she gave us some pointers to work on before the next session. She mentioned that he was ready and would probably walk by the next appointment and confirmed that nothing was wrong, which was a relief. But she did say that he had some loose muscles and was just born that way, which would explain the delayed sitting up and crawling. At next appointment, which was on my birthday, Max started walking! I believe he was holding out so that he could give me a great b-day gift =P. He walked a good ten steps by himself. I think the wide open space and carpet helped, which we don’t have at home. Now we are debating if we should go to the next appointment, which would definitely be the last. The PT did give us pointers, but I haven’t made up my mind how valuable the appointments were since all the PT did was give Max some new toys to play with, which inspired us to get new toys for Max. We got him so many new toys to encourage him to walk, it was like Christmas! He’s still on willingly walking on his own yet, but when he does, watch out! It’s interesting that the PT said that he is advanced in a lot of ways. For example, he can get on and off a ride on toy by himself and steer.

In other news, Max has started daycare and has been going for a month now. He only goes three days a week. We had looked at larger daycares and home daycares and decided on a home daycare on the way to Hubby’s work. We are pleased for the most part. It was time for Max to become socialized and he loves being with other kids. We also wanted him to be in a new environment in which he’d have to learn to deal with new situations in which he isn’t always the focus. He’s also been learning new things while being there. Now the grandparents have more freedom to travel after taking care of Max full time for a year, so it’s a win-win. What has been hard, for me anyway, is the lack of control, which I’ve been dealing with ever since I went back to work. Not to say that the grandparents and daycare don’t to a good job. They do a great job! But Max’s daily schedule isn’t under my control, so I can’t fix, say, sleep problems how I’d like to. And Max now has three different schedules and he’s definitely overtired most of the day since he dropped his second nap right at the time he started daycare. I was fiercely protective of his sleep schedule, but I can’t control it anymore and it’s all over the map. But Max is happy (unless he’s tired).

2009-04-27T22:31:00.000-07:00

Today is a momentous day. My Mom finally bought a new car. Her old car, or third baby, held out for 22 years exactly. It was only when the brakes failed that my parents decided that fixing the car would be too costly and they might as well buy a new car. I can't imagine how happy my Mom is right now.

Publish Post

15 Months

2009-04-09T13:11:00.000-07:00

Max had his 15 month appointment with the Ped last week, which happened to be on our anniversary. (That was our only celebration. Hubby did surprise me with Wicked tickets for a later date, which is HUGE since he’s actually willing to see a musical with me =P) Max’s stats were 33 inches for height, 25 lbs 6 oz for weight, and 48.7 cm for head circumference. That makes him in the 95th, 70th, and 90th percentile, respectively. He’s still in 18 – 24 month clothes, but the some pants are a little loose in the waist. Don’t we wish we all had that problem! =P

In terms of development, he’s definitely a full-fledged toddler now. He’s becoming a crazy little boy! He’s rebellious and wants to exert his independence. He whines and throws the occasional tantrum to try to get what he wants. (This is when you become very aware of how unconditional love works.) He’s very active and loves getting into everything. Cabinets are his favorite exploration spots. I taught him how to sign “milk” and “more” so when he wants more of something, he’ll start signing “more” like crazy. He also learned how to nod his head for “yes” (He’s been shaking his head no for awhile now. Everything was no until now). I’ll just ask him if he wants something and he’ll shake his head yes or no.

As for sleep, no significant improvements. He’ll nap about 2.5 – 3 hours total during the day, but in two naps. He’ll sleep around 8:30 p.m. and wakes up at about 5:30 a.m. What has changed is our routine to deal with his early morning waking and occasional night waking. We had been sitting in his room as he falls asleep at night, but we never went back to letting him fall asleep on his own. The Ped recommended that we try crying it out again so that he re-learns to sooth himself back to sleep. We’ve done it a couple of times now and it took anywhere from 3 minutes to 30 minutes of crying to sleep. So far, he hasn’t soothed himself back to sleep at 5:30 a.m. Hubby has actually been going in his room for about a month now because Max gets too worked up if I go in, and therefore, there would be no hope of him going back to sleep. So Hubby will graciously go in and sit in the rocking chair, or if that doesn’t work, he’ll rock Max back to sleep. Hubby usually falls asleep in the chair either with or without Max. I get to sleep all the way until Max wakes up for the day around 7:00 and Hubby goes back to our bed for another hour of sleep. Hopefully the CIO will prevent the early morning waking.

The question on everyone’s mind right is when is he going to take those first steps. The Ped said not to worry….until 18 months. By then he should be walking, or else he should see a physical therapist. I’m not too worried about it. All of his milestones have been on the later side. It’ll happen when he’s ready. Maybe it runs in the family since his cousins didn’t walk until 15 months. I’m sure his size doesn’t help. My coworker and fellow mom of a toddler actually used the word “blessing” to describe our situation, since it’s a whole new ball game when he’s going to start walking…away from us. Yikes!

Here’s a recent pic of Max doing his best impression of the Cozy Coupe:

2009-03-23T17:58:00.000-07:00

Hubby and I needed a little getaway and decided to go to SLO this past weekend. We figured that we should also do a little warm-up trip to see how Max would do while traveling. So we borrowed Max’s grandparents’ minivan and headed down south for one night. We packed a ton of stuff, but ended up using most of it, including the baby monitor, booster seat, and lots of snacks. Max was fine during the 3 hour drive one way especially since the minivan has a monitor and he watched Baby Einstein videos part of the time. It all went downhill during naptime though. He usually gets rocked to sleep during naps, but I wasn’t about to take him out of the car seat while we were on the road, so he just cried and cried. No matter what I tried to quite him, he wouldn’t stop until he finally dozed off after about 20-30 minutes. But he took an almost 2 hour nap both ways and was super happy when he woke up. We stayed at the Embassy Suites so that Hubby and I wouldn’t disturb Max when he was sleeping in the bedroom. We asked for a crib and they provided a pack and play, which he actually fell asleep in with no problems. It was all downhill again at about 5:30 though when Max woke up and started crying. We started freaking out because of the thin walls and it was tough getting him back to sleep. Finally he went back to sleep after a lot of rocking, but he actually slept until 8 am. Max behaved really well for the most part though and loved being in a new environment.

It was nice being in SLO again. It’s always relaxing being there for some reason. Must be the different pace there. We headed to the Firestone’s, walked downtown and then after Max’s nap (which was only 20 min, probably because he was too excited with being in a new place) we took a stroll around the whole campus. We then had Splash Café for dinner. So many changes to the town and the school! Here are some of the more notable ones since I was there last there a couple of years ago:

· The Polo outlet in Atascadero isn’t there anymore. It was replaced by a Big 5.
·
California Pizza Kitchen replaced Fresh Choice. How commercialized! *hymph!* Go to Woodstocks!

· There’s an Urban Outfitters, along with a Banana Republic, Apple Store, and Pottery Barn. I guess the college kids need a Pottery Barn to decorate their dorms.

· Tortilla Flats was replaced by some restaurant. I drank “the worm” and had a nameplate on the wall with my name and “Dancing Queen” to commemorate. I thought it’d be there forever! After suffering through that, I want my plaque back! I hate tequila!

· Open Air Flowers moved and Firestone’s patio now takes up that space. And Firestone’s was remodeled. No more booths, just tables and a huge bar. However, the food at Firestone’s is exactly how we remembered it! =)

· Mondeo Pronto is still there.

· Thai Palace, the one that faced the parking lot, was remodeled and looks all fancy.

· There was a sign that said “Pho” downtown, but it belonged to Golden China, that Chinese buffet.

· Starbucks replaced the café in the UU.

· There’s a huge apartment complex on campus next to the sports complex with a swimming pool and Jamba Juice, Pete’s Coffee, and Einstein Bros. Bagels. This is in addition to the apartments above BFE. Since these complexes are kind of far away from campus, seems likes there’s a lot of biking going on. There are signs about walking your bike everywhere. There’s also a couple of newer buildings on campus.

· Cal Poly wine is available now.

I’m sure if my brother went back, he’d be completely shocked. While he went to Cal Poly, the plaza with Barnes and Noble and the theater was being built.

The Cutest Thing....

2009-03-05T20:56:00.000-08:00

When you hold Max and say "Hug!" he'll lean his head on your shoulder and pat you on the back =). But now when I say hug, he usually does it and then points to something that he wants. What a crafty little guy!

2009-02-10T17:38:00.002-08:00

Max's favorite word at the moment is "this." I think he learned it because whenever he gestures that he wants something, we say, "You want this?" So everything he points at now and wants is "this."

He's had been saying "wat dat" a lot when he'd point at something, so we would explain what the object is. And then he'd say "oh."

2009-02-10T17:38:00.001-08:00

When I worked for one of the big accounting firms, we had training on how to build rapport with the clients. I remember the cheesy video we watched in which the auditor commented on pictures on the auditee’s desk. “Oh, what a nice picture…”

So what did two newbie external auditors do when they came into my cube separately? “Oh, what a great picture.” Blah. The oldest trick in the book. Too bad I know this trick and it doesn’t on with me. Am I cynical or what!?

New Developments

2009-02-06T15:06:00.000-08:00

Max is 13 months old now and definitely does not seem like a baby anymore! He’s really active, animated and vocal. Watch out when he starts walking! Who know when he’ll take his first steps, but no rush. I can only imagine that it’ll be much harder keep tabs on him when he’s more mobile.

In a span of the month we’ve successfully: 1.weaned him from breastfeeding; 2.got him to drink cow’s milk; 3. got him to drink milk cold; 4. weaned him off the bottle. (He drinks his milk from a straw cup, he never really took to the sippy). Each milestone has made daily life noticeably easier. No more pumping, mixing formula, warming milk, and best of all, no more washing bottles with their small parts. He can also hold his cup by himself now, which we didn’t let him do with glass bottles.

It’s normal developmentally for him, but he doesn’t really like pureed food anymore. So now we’re in this in between stage in which he doesn’t really like baby food, but he can’t eat all the foods that we eat because they aren’t soft enough (or they’re just plain bad for him). And he prefers finger foods, which is really messy. His favorite food is spaghetti. We cut up the noodles and feed it to him, but after awhile he starts grabbing at the bowl, which is a sign that he wants to feed himself. As you can imagine, it gets really messy. It’s a challenge to think of new things that he can eat that he will want to eat. I bought him his first set of utensils to let him try feeding himself. He can’t use a fork himself to grab food yet, but I stab a piece of alphabet pasta and pass the fork to him so that he can eat the pasta off the fork himself.
Max can understand words now. Depending on how difficult the word is, we use Chinese or English. He knows that “brush brush” means brushing his teeth (he’s known this for a couple of months now) and he’ll open his mouth then I say it. He knows that “chi cho” means balloon and he’ll point at it when we say it. He knows that Elmo is that red furry puppet. He can say Ma Ma and Ba Ba (Dad in Chinese) but he doesn’t really direct them toward us. The other night though, we were changing Max into his pj’s and he actually said his first comprehensible words! He pointed at the puppy banner is his room and said “go go”, which means dog in Chinese. Ok, go is a relatively easy word to say (what word in Chinese isn’t? they’re all one syllable), but it was a real word that meant something and not baby talk or jabber. I was so excited when he said it because it was the first step to having a two way conversation!

As Hubby mentioned, Max is on his way to using the potty! His grandparents sit him on his potty seat when Max has that look on his face and he actually goes! We haven’t been able to get him to go #2 at our house, but he has peed!

AND Max has been sleeping better! In the past two weeks, he has consistently slept from about 8:30 – 6:30 or 7! He had one or two wakings here and but they were early in the evening, and he does make some noise at 5:30, but he goes back to sleep by himself. He has also been taking consistently longer naps. 40 min at the least to 2+ hours! We found out that he sleeps better without any blankets. We always thought that he was cold because I’m freezing and need two blankets in our bedroom, but he does fine with just a sleep sack. Ahhhh! All this time and it was the blankets that were causing him to wake! At least we eliminated one variable!

2009-01-23T13:36:00.000-08:00

Max is wearing his 18 - 24 month clothes now! He only wore his 12 month sized jacket for two months! I read that toddlers can have growth spurts overnight and can actually be up to one inch taller the next day. He's definitely had one of those monster spurts!

2009-01-16T22:29:00.000-08:00

2009 has already had its ups and downs. During the first weekend of January, we were celebrating the tail end of the holidays. I was dreading going back to work after two weeks off because it was so wonderful to spend so much time with Max again, so we decided to make the most of the weekend by going to the zoo. Well, we went to the Palo Alto Junior Museum and Zoo since we didn’t want to make the 45 minute trek to Oakland or SF and the PA museum is free. The PA museum wasn’t that impressive to us adults but little kids love it. There are some hands on exhibits and some animals that you don’t see every day, like a peacock. Other than an owl and a bat, that’s about as exotic as it got. But Max really had a good time, mostly from people watching I think. He’s such a little busy body.

Dinner that that night at his Aunt’s house was full of firsts. Max tried a lot new foods like animal cookies and beef stew and was eating it up! But when it came to dessert, Hubby fed him some pineapple with cinnamon that he had prepared and Max threw up! His second episode. This was the first time I actually saw him throw up, and it was a lot! But again, he didn’t cry or seem sad by it. Maybe the pineapple was too acidic. So we bathed him and since I hadn’t packed an extra outfit (which I will start doing again), he had to wear his girl cousin’s old clothes. He was back to his old self though after playing with his cousins’ toys. So much fun that he started crawling properly on his hands and knees! Finally after 12 months! He wasn’t doing the army crawl anymore and we were all amazed. Sure, it happened shortly before he’s about to start walking, but at least he finally got the hang of it.

Spending two weeks with Max was a great ending to a year of breastfeeding. I always said to myself that after I went back to work after my maternity leave, I’d keep nursing until I’d run dry or until he turned one. Well, I wasn’t able to provide enough so that Max had breast milk exclusively after 7 months, but I never did run dry so I kept pumping while at work and breastfeeding in the morning and on the weekends. I decided to stop breastfeeding and pumping when I went back to work after vacation since he turned one. I felt like it was definitely the right time, as Max never really did stop biting (ouch!) and he was actually getting to big to fit in our rocking chair with me. It was starting to feel weird to me to continue since he was getting so big and he wasn’t really a baby anymore. It was definitely a bitter sweet ending. I was sad that this relationship was ending because we won’t have the special time that only Max and I shared anymore (and I’ve read that you feel sad because you’re hormones become out of whack again when you stop). But it was such an instant relief for me to quit pumping. It was really nice not to have to lug the pump around and it freed up so much time for me because I wasn’t just sitting there pumping (although I usually played with my phone and caught up on blogs during that time =P) and I didn’t have to wash pump parts anymore. I instantly got an extra 25 minutes back at night since I no longer had to pump and wash before I went to sleep, which I had been doing ever since Max was 5 days old. I had a feeling that Max wouldn’t be too effected by the end, especially since he has had bottles almost everyday, and I was right. I think I was sadder than he was, but that’s ok. The first three days were so uncomfortable though and I was totally leaking, but that subsided. I’m now looking forward to drinking caffeine again and having the occasional alcoholic drink =) I don’t usually toot my own horn, but I will now =P Through my breastfeeding experience, I’ve learned that I can be a very determined and dedicated person.

It turned out to be a bad time to stop though because we had stopped on Monday and on Wednesday, he had started vomiting (again!) and having diarrhea. His Grandfather had a stomach bug and Max got it. He started losing weight and we were freaking out since he was so sick. His ped said to keep him hydrated, which was hard to do since he was refusing formula and Pedalyte. and never really liked drinking water. We ended up having to feed him water with a soup spoon since he found that it was fun to drink that way. We learned that diarrhea could last up to 10 days, and that’s how long it took for him to get over it and regain his appetite! He’s so skinny now. Not good, especially when the ped said his weight was a little low. But I’m happy to report that he ate a lot at dinner tonight and it seems he’s making up for lost time!

Even if I had kept on breastfeeding, I wouldn’t have been able to anyway. Hubby and I got really sick as well two days after Max got the bug and we both got sick at the same time. Hubby’s mom also got sick. It was so debilitating because Max’s primary caretaker was sick, and we, the back-up, were also sick. Even Pocky was sick! I hadn’t thought about what would happen if Hubby and I were both out of commission at the same time, but fortunately, Hubby’s dad took over for the day since he was recovered. We couldn’t even get out of bed and I couldn’t even keep water down, so Hubby and I decided drag ourselves out of bed to Urgent Care so that we could get better and take Max back in. Four hours later, which included a bunch of tests, a shot in the behind for nausea, and two bags of IV fluids, I was released. (The nurse said I was a trooper. It was nothing compared to a c-section! Hubby actually refused all of the treatment because of his fears needles, but he recovered much faster anyway). The next day I was still out of commission and spent most of the day in bed while. Hubby was up and about and my Mom helped us out during the day. (I’m so thankful that we have both set of Grandparents to help us out!) It’s been a week now and I just got my appetite back. Two good things did come out of this ordeal, albeit not under the best circumstances: 1. I caught up on sleep since I probably slept 14 hours for two days, and 2. I lost 6 pounds, so all the holiday weight gain is definitely gone!

2009-01-05T21:11:00.000-08:00

Max had his 12 month appointment today and he measured 23 lbs 2 oz, 32 inches, and 48 cm for head circumference. That put him in the 65th, 97th, and 90th percentiles respectively. 97th PERCENTILE!!! He's the size of an 18 month old. I can't believe it! Not bad for a Chinese kid. But 65th percentile for weight is a little on the low side. The Ped said that that's normal since he's so active. All that pulling up and cruising probably really does expend a lot of energy. I feel like we should fatten him up a bit so that he can even out!

Happy 1st Birthday Maxwell!!!

2008-12-31T21:34:00.000-08:00

I can’t believe that it’s been a whole year since Max was born! Time really flies when you have a baby. During the days leading up to his birthday, I couldn’t help but think, “At this time last year, I was eating spicy foods and walking so that I would go into labor…I was big and anxious…etc.” I still remember the day he was born so well.

I never thought I’d have these feelings, but I’m going to miss the baby months. It was such a fun and interesting time, watching him grow and all of us experiencing new things. We’ll always be experiencing new things together, but there’s just something about those first months. Now I have a toddler on my hands. Yikes!

We had a small celebration with close family. Having a birthday in the winter and having a small house limited our venue options for a party. The first birthday party is really for the parents anyway and Max was already overwhelmed with just our families alone. We celebrated by going to Fresh Choice, which is Max’s favorite restaurant since he gets to try a variety of finger foods each time we go there (and it’s the most kid friendly restaurant ever). And since he’s 12 months old, he can eat almost anything now. We went back home and had ice cream cake, which he didn’t seem too excited about when he tried it, which is good I guess =P We wrapped up the day with a family walk so that we could include Pocky in the festivities and opened presents. It was a good day =) Max has never been happier and more active than he was today.

In honor of his first 12 months, here are some of my favorite pics of Max other than the ones that either Hubby and I have posted already:

3 days old. It's as if he's saying, "Ya I'm cute, whatcha gonna do about it?"

First day at home. "What's all the comotion?"

Two weeks old and milk drunk. He's saluting me =P

One month old. The model pose.

Two months old and and "fun to be me." Looks like a little sumo wrestler.

Three months old. Look at that mug!

Four months old. This was taking during the sniffle incident. I love the cheeks!

Five months old. I took this pic on way to Monterey. What a happy baby! This picture is framed on my desk at work.

Seven months. Naked baby!

Eight months. Silly baby!

Nine months. Max and Panda, which I have passed down to him.

A couple of days shy of one year. "Eh oh! Oh eh!"

Sleep, or lack thereof.

2008-12-29T14:31:00.000-08:00

I’d have to say that the hardest aspect of parenthood for me so far has been the sleep deprivation. It seems so trivial and such an afterthought for all new parents, but it’s not for us. Starting from the time when Max was born and up until now, lack of sleep has been the most challenging change to overcome. Of all of the babies I know, Max’s sleep problems seem the worst since they aren’t related to nursing. (And all of the babies I know seem to sleep 11 - 12 at night without a peep! How???)

It all started before Max was born. I had been taking naps every day before Max came, which I needed because carrying a 9 pounder became exhausting towards the end. Then I labored to the point of complete and total physical exhaustion, and then on top of that, I had to recover from surgery. It was all downhill from there. Max was already a champion sleeper though, going 5 hours between feedings during the first few weeks, which was already considered sleeping through the night. I remember being so tired during those nights of pumping that that I wondered how I was even functioning. Although I’d take naps, the cumulative sleep deficit always made me tired.

Months 1 - 4 were actually not that bad. We all went to sleep at about 1 a.m. and since Max was sleeping 6 - 8 hours already, we’d all wake up naturally around 7 a.m. or 8 a.m. and Hubby would go off to work. Max took 3 naps a day, and he and I would curl up in the rocking chair if I needed a nap. His naps were sometimes short though, so I didn’t have much time to do things around the house. Little did I know that this would become a habit. I thought I had a little overachiever on my hands as his overnight sleep was increased steadily to 8 – 10 hours. The other babies I knew were still sleeping around 6 hours. I thought he was on his way to surpass 10 hours since he reached that a couple of times. No luck though, as he hit a plateau at about 8 – 9 hours.

Months 5 – 8: Back to work. We gradually had moved his bedtime to 11 p.m. and then to 8 p.m. in anticipation that Max would sleep longer at night and as recommended by our Pediatrician. At this point he was consistently sleeping around 9.5 hours so he’d wake up about 6. For two or three days out of the week, he’d wake up in the middle of the night or wake up really early and we’d have to go to him. His naps were also really short. The sleep deficit started to accumulate again because I was averaging 6 hours of sleep a night. On the bad nights, I’d get 4 – 5 hours. Needless to say, I was very tired at work every day. I felt like I was in a constant tired state; like I was perpetually jet lagged. Even though I could manage on 6 hours at night before Max, I always had the weekend to sleep in and catch up. I also have sleep problems of my own, so I had really bad nights where I wouldn’t be able to sleep on top of Max’s sleep issues (he must have inherited them from me). I no longer had the luxury of daily naps when I needed them, and I really needed them once he had started night waking. Weekend morning naps were now a must for me. Hubby would be on duty and I would take my 1 hour nap while Max did. I still take the weekend morning naps and so far I’ve maybe missed a few naps since I went back to work. (This is why I never answer my phone during the a.m.) We decided to sleep train him and let him cry it out along with trying to schedule his naps during the right times according to Happy Sleep Habits, Happy Child. It was hard to hear him cry, but I took solace in the fact that he was learning how to fall asleep and stay asleep on his own. It took two months before he’d go to sleep on his own without crying at night, but he eventually got there (I’ve read that it’s normal for some kids to cry up to 15 minutes at night before they fall asleep because it helps them settle down. Max will still occasionally cry before he falls asleep.) He started sleeping through the night more frequently. Maybe the blackout shade and the sound machine helped. Naps were different because his grandparents wouldn’t let him cry it out. On the weekends we let him cry it out for naps, but we eventually decided to rock him sleep to be consistent with his weekday routine. You might be asking where was Hubby during all of this? When I went back to work, I still had trouble transitioning and realizing that I could not “do it all” like I had been during my maternity leave. Since I was still in that mode, I was waking up with Max until it started to wear me down and I asked Hubby to help. He was willing of course, so he started going in to Max’s room during the wakings. Well, we all know that Hubby is not as patient as I am, so after some consoling, Hubby would wake me up and ask me to take over. After all, it was a transition for Hubby too when I went back to work. Besides, no one is more sensitive to a baby’s cry than the mother. I would wake up at the very first cry and my body was so used to waking up that sometimes I would wake up at 6 am in anticipation of Max crying. Furthermore, I still nursed Max in the morning, so I always had to get up with him when he started his day. But Hubby saw how wore down I was getting (coupled with my own crankiness) and stepped up. We compromised and would switch-off nights or I would take the wakings before a particular time and Hubby would take the later shift. The entire burden shouldn’t fall on one parent. Why is one parent’s sleep more precious than the other when they both work?

Months 9 - 10: These were the worst. The gains after sleep training didn’t last long. Max started waking early in the morning, usually at 4 or 5 am. He also woke up during the middle of the night. I let him cry himself back to sleep, which is recommended if you cry it out. Sometimes he would fall back asleep after 20 min or so, sometimes not until 1 hour. The crying was now tortuous for me, so I would go downstairs and make his bottles for the day, read more sleep books, or start getting ready for work until he stopped. Hubby and I couldn’t take it anymore, so we agreed that if he cried for longer than 30 minutes, then we would rock him back to sleep, which was a definite no-no for the cry it out method since it sends mixed messages. We would rock him though and sometimes he wouldn’t fall back to sleep after 1 – 2 hours of rocking and consoling. If I was lucky, I’d get to go back to sleep before 7 am and take a 30 – 1 hour nap. My sleep wasn’t restorative at all and I felt like I’d aged more in those two months than I ever felt. (Interrupted sleep really gets you. It’s so much worse than lack of sleep.) I was so desperate to fix his sleep problems that I tried strategies from 4 different sleep books, ranging from no-cry/attachment parenting to hard core “extinction.” None of the tips really worked for the long run. (Extinction, however, was the most effective.) My biggest criticism of these books is that they don’t address the possibility that your child will relapse after sleep training. The authors just assume that your baby will be cured of all sleep problems if you follow everything in the book. I tried to figure out what was causing him to wake, but there are so many variables like developmental milestones, hunger, and teething, that it’s really hard to pinpoint. I think he hit his 8 month sleep regression a month late. The little guy just had too much going on in his growing noggin of his. He definitely woke up because of teething because he’d scream in pain all of the sudden, so we gave him infant Tylenol or Motrin after checking with our Ped. Motrin actually lasts for 8 hours, so we gave it to him during his night time routine, which was unsettling to me because I really did not want drug my child continuously. I started to accept the fact that Max may not need that much sleep. However, although Max is a happy baby, he’s definitely much happier after he sleeps a long time, so he does need more sleep.

Max, however, managed to sleep 10 – 11 hours at night for two weeks or so. The 11 hour stints were during the days he had roseola. I thought this was a sign of good things to come, but it wasn’t and his sleep decreased a little more than 9 hours.
I never knew that I was capable of taking two naps in one day. I slept a lot during Thanksgiving. I was actually fully rested, which I haven’t felt in so long.

Month 11: Max was sleeping 9 – 10 hours. Not great and still less than the average 11 – 12 over night, but we took it. He’d also take long naps sometimes that were around 2 hours long. He still wasn’t reaching the average though. Max started developing separation anxiety and his anxiety was at its height when I returned from my trip to Denver. Hopefully my trip wasn’t the cause, which I don’t think it was because nothing was out of the ordinary the first night I was back. But after that, Max would not fall asleep on his own anymore. He would cry immediately when we left the room and would protest even before hitting the mattress. He’d instantly flip over and sit up in his crib crying. We decide to retrain him and let him cry it out, but he cried for more than hour for three nights before falling asleep. He even vomited one night from crying. So we decided to stop crying it out because it’s one thing to protest sleep by crying, but it’s another thing to cry because you think your parents are not coming back. Falling asleep was only part of the problem. Max started night waking again and the past week he’s woken up three times during two nights. The only way to get him back to sleep is by rocking him, which sometimes takes an hour. Since he sleeps better in our bed, we’d rock him back to sleep and take him in if he wakes up around 5. Although I banned him from our bed early on during naps because I didn’t want it to become a habit, I figured that if he can fall asleep in his crib, brining him into bed in the morning isn’t that bad if we all can get some more sleep. Needless to say we were exhausted again. I guess we adopted attachment parenting since we did everything to help him fall back asleep. (My biggest complaint about attachment parenting is that there doesn’t seem to be an end. When will a kid be unattached? And the books say that your child is a baby for such short period of time, but I think 1 – 2 years of sleeplessness is way too long to suffer though.) At least we pinpointed the cause to separation anxiety. I’ve read that one way to get over it is to sleep in the same room as the baby until it passes. Who knows when that will be since babies don’t fully understand object permanence until they are two.

I went online to search for some more sleep tips and had read that a lot of parents slept in their babies rooms to ease the separation anxiety. So one night after a few minutes of crying, I asked Hubby to sit in the rocking chair as Max falls asleep, and it worked! Max settled down within 10 minutes and actually fell asleep on his own without rocking. He did wake up 3 times again, and Hubby and I took turns just sitting in the chair and saying “go to sleep, Max.” He fell asleep on his own each time! Sometimes within 5 minutes, but the average has been about 15. What a breakthrough! It’s so much better to sit in the chair to just be with him rather than rocking him and pacing back and forth. We’ve been doing this for a week now and his night wakings gradually decreased to just the early morning waking, at which point we still bring him into bed because it’s the holidays and we all want to sleep in. (We haven’t tried sleeping in his room yet and since his night wakings are decreasing, maybe we don’t have too.)I guess we are going to continue this until Max can fall asleep again on his own without us being in the room. We’ll know when he’s ready when he doesn’t start crying when he first hits the crib mattress.

During this anxious time, Max has been taking monster naps here and there that can last 2 – 3.5 hours. I think it’s because he’s so overtired that he’s catching up. And since we’ve all been napping together during the holidays, Hubby and I are catching up on sleep as well.

So this is where we’re at now. Hopefully phase doesn’t last long and I’m so glad that it’s the holidays so that we can try to catch up on sleep. Our main goal has always been trying to maximize sleep for everyone and we’ll continue to try.

2008-12-23T13:51:00.000-08:00

Max likes to jabber and when he comes up with a new "word" of his, he repeats it over and over again. Some of his previous favorites were "ouf," "dat," and "jeh". Recently, his favorite word has been "hao," which means yes or good in Chinese. I don't think he knows what it means so I don't consider it his first word. It's funny though when you ask him a question and he answers with a "hao!" The other day Hubby and I were talking how we're destined for a minivan. (We're going to have kids, parents, and a dog to shuttle around! It's inevitable). I asked Max if he wants a minivan. No response. Then I said "Max, do you want a Highlander?" He said "hao!" So cute! hehe. The other day when Hubby and I were sleeping and Max was in bed with us and woke up for the day. (More on why Max was in our bed in an upcoming post). He kept patting me and rolling over me to wake me up. I was still half asleep when I said, "Max, do you want me to get up now?"...."Hao!"

2008-12-13T18:27:00.000-08:00

I went to Denver for work for two days. Well, I only had to work for 1.5 hours, so I considered it a mini getaway :) It was great hanging out with J, W, and baby R! What a cutie! Love the chubs! This meant that Hubby was on his own with Max for two days and one night though. This was my second time being away from Max for an extended period, but first time being away from Max AND Hubby. I missed Max a lot, as usual, and it was definitely strange being on my own. I really missed my family and very happy to see them when I got back. And Max was not a total terror while with Hubby. Hubby actually reported that he was happy while I was gone. Whenever I hear that Max is happy and I'm not there, it makes me sad in a way, since he's happy without me! But when I got home, the separation anxiety continued immediately. He's got it now and he starts crying whenever I leave the room. So it's good, in a way, to know that he still needs me :/

2008-11-16T21:34:00.000-08:00

I went to Vegas again this past weekend. Here are the highlights:

- Went to Vegas for work, again, so it was paid for =). Well, partially. I only had to work a couple of hours so only half the trip was paid for.

- We flew on Virgin America. The plane's cabin looked like an ultra lounge with black leather seats and purple and pink lighting. They played house music while boarding. I felt so uncool... I can't imagine, say, my parents flying this airline, but they would because it's cheap.

- Got to the rental car place and the guy who rented me the car said "I don't feel like walking all the way to the car you're supposed to get. Do you want a red VW bug instead?"....YES!

- Stayed at Planet Hollywood since we've never stayed there before. The place looks like a giant ultra lounge. Again, felt sooo uncool...

- I got a hot stone massage at the spa in the hotel. It was sooo relaxing. Love it!!!

- Got a caramel ice blended from Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf - only in LA and Vegas do I get these!

- I finished a whole alcoholic drink, but it took me an hour =P.

- Of course...spending some alone time with Hubby. Got to have that along with "me time," which was the spa treatment.

Here are the low lights:

- Being away from Max for more than 48 hours =(. Hubby's family was supposed to go with us and we were going to take Max with us. I was all excited to experience travel with Max since I feel like it's one of those things we should do with him. It didn't work out though so he stayed at his Grandparents, which said he was happy the entire time!

- Max waking up during the night two nights before we left. Not being able to sleep the night before we left because I was to anxious to leave Max and I was too excited to go. Not being able to sleep the first night we were there because I knew I had to get up at 5:30 am to go to work (in my earlier days, I would have just stayed up). Being up for 22 hours the next day because we had a late night. All in all, 17 hours of sleep over 4 nights. I'm still recovering!

- Getting my suitcase searched because I packed my pump. The TSA agent asked me what it was and I said breast pump very discreetly and he had to go ask his female coworker if that really exists...haha. I still pumped at least 3 times a day while I was away.

- The consultant I met with is in her early to mid 20's and she was describing to me her plans for clubbing while she was there. I felt sooo old! And then she said, "I'll go see some shows, at another time in my life." *hymph*! Here's the kicker: She said she'd like to see Mama Mia and I said I love Mama Mia. So she asked what makes it so good, and I said it's based on ABBA songs and she' says, "What's that?" @#!%#@!%#$!

- Losing money. My Vegas win streak is over. Ouch!

My Little Monster

2008-11-09T20:28:00.000-08:00

My poor little monster. He first had a runny nose, then developed a fever after tagging along with his cousins for trick-or-treating. (We pulled him along in a little red wagon.) His fever remained above 101 degrees for three days. Then he got a rash that lingered for three days. We found out that he had roseola, a viral infection. He lost his appetite and was soooo cranky, but at least he actually slept the average number of hours that babies his age sleep - 13 hours instead of 11 - 12. This was the first major sickness that we've experienced. I'm happy to say that he's over it now and he's his old self again. And it seems like he's making up for lost time because he's back to sleeping 11 hours (waking up at 5 am!) and eating everything in sight!

2008-10-19T21:40:00.001-07:00

We recently gave Max his first set of wheels and he was the happiest I've ever seem him. I think it was so cute/funny when he ran into something and paused for a bit, and then went zooming off again. (He doesn't run into things anymore). Is this a preview of what it'll be like when he gets his first car?

2008-10-19T21:15:00.000-07:00

Recently, Max seems more like a little boy than a baby:

- He's the size of a one year old and wears 12 month sized clothes!

- The other day when I put him over my shoulder to pat him and burp him, he started patting me on the back. haha.

- He jabbers now and engages in a "conversation."

- He lets us know his opinions and he complains more now, but he's still a good boy =)

- If he's hungry or tired, he'll start saying "nai, nai, nai, NAI, NAI, NAI...!" instead of just fussing and making noise.

- He can pull himself up to stand in his crib, but he gets stuck because he doesn't know how to get down yet =/

- He's starting to crawl, finally! He's doing the inch worm crawl now, pulling himself forward with his arms which makes his butt raise up. He then pushes off his knees.

- He's eating finger foods now. Cheerios are his favorite. Most of them actually makes it into his mouth. =P

- Thomas the Tank Engine was on TV and said "Hello!" and Max responded "Allo!"

- He waves goodbye and gives you five. He used to clap for you, but I think we made him do it too much so he went on strike, haha.

- He now laughs when I have the sniffles.

2008-09-28T22:01:00.001-07:00

Max had his 9 month appointment and he was 21 lbs 8 oz, 46.5 cm for head circumference, and 29.5 inches long which makes him in the 70th, 80th and 90th percentile respectively. I can't believe he's only in the 70th percentile for weight since he's still so big! The Ped said that he's the size of a 12 month old. Amazing!

2008-09-16T17:28:00.000-07:00

Here's a baby you don't want to run into in a dark alley.

I laughed when I saw this pic because I've never seen this expression on Max's face. Hubby must have snapped the pic at just the right time. Maybe this will be his game face when he becomes a line backer. Grrrr.

Here's what he normally looks like. I swear!

2008-09-16T17:27:00.000-07:00

A couple of weeks ago, my coworker, who is also a new mother, had asked me if Max and I had the pleasure of experiencing projectile vomit yet. She went on and described what it’s like and I was HORRIFIED. So guess what happens the week after…

We had been steadily introducing new solid foods to Max and it seemed like he loved everything he tried, and had no reactions; sweet potato, squash, pears, etc. (both jarred and home pureed) Anyway, this streak came to an end when I fed him his first jar peas. At first he had a funny look on his face when he tried it, but he ate the rest of it, so I didn’t think anything of it.

An hour later, Max and I drove to my parents’ house. He was babbling along and all of the sudden he was quiet. And then it came…It didn’t sound like a baby was throwing up. It sounded like an older kid was. Since he was in his rear facing convertible seat, I couldn’t see how bad it was. I was just hoping it wasn’t much. So we pull up in the driveway and I ran around to his door and was completely speechless with my mouth dropped open. It was sooooo much. I couldn’t believe a baby could contain that much stuff. It was all over him and his car seat (Luckily it didn’t reach my car’s seats or upholstery. That’s my boy!) It looked like the Exorcist…pea soup. After starring at him in shock for a few seconds, he just started laughing. He wasn’t crying or anything, so I just started laughing too. I took him out of the car and cleaned him and the car seat up at my parents. I left him there to run a quick an errand, and I found out that he threw up again while I was gone. This time, it was even more! Truly shocking! I’m glad that I didn’t actually see him throw up, because I would have totally freaked out.

I don’t think I’ll be feeding him peas anytime soon. I gave the remaining 10 jars of peas that we had to my coworker.

So, new parents… projectile vomit…be prepared!

2008-09-05T15:41:00.001-07:00

I must be the only person who is a fan of both Jon and Kate Plus 8 and The Cho Show.

2008-08-22T14:46:00.000-07:00

The Ringling Bros. circus is in town and they are camping out in front of my work! There are train tracks in front out of our building that they’re renting for the week. I guess the circus performers live/travel in sleeper cars and they need somewhere to park when they are performing in a city. They have a red and white school bus that transports performers from the train in Los Gatos to the San Jose Arena. So this past week, driving into work has been pretty interesting. I saw some of the performers tanning on the side of the tracks and some one set up a Direct TV dish on the side of the road. No animals roaming around though. I guess they stay at the arena, hopefully not all caged up.

I love watching the Olympics. I remember during the ’84 Olympics I’d high jump over the arm of our couch and I’d stack legos on top to make “the bar” higher and higher. Least to say I was inspired. If there is one sport that I would have wanted to compete in, it would have been BMX racing. I had a BMX bike when I was little. It was a girl’s bike, but it was yellow with a checkerboard design, not some frilly pink bike with streamers. I used to ride it in a dried out creek and on a little hidden BMX track in the same park near my house. I still remember some of my nastier spills. So if BMX was an Olympic sport back then, I would have been inspired to continue.

So ever since Max started eating solid, sprouted teeth, and became more active, he’s fallen into a sleep routine of going to be around 8 pm, waking up anywhere between 4 – 6:30 am, and then maybe falling back to sleep for another half-hour to an hour after I feed him. Since I go to bed around 10:30 – 11, this means I get about 6 hours of sleep and if Max does fall back asleep, I get a half an hour more =/ I feel like I’m in a constant state of tiredness. Hopefully he’s going to grow out of this because we’ve been trying the sleep training techniques for early morning rising, but they’re not working. But I guess shouldn’t complain because he’ll sleep 9 hours straight through.

This is such a great time with Max though. He’s babbling and making all kinds of noises. He tries to have conversations with Pocky. He plays with his tongue and mouth and makes funny faces, probably because more teeth are coming in. Rolling around and becoming more mobile, but sitting up and still staying in one place. He smiles and laughs a lot. No stranger anxiety yet and will let anyone hold him still. I’m still playing lotto in hopes of retiring to be with him!

It’s official! I’ve lost all of the baby weight! =) My OB was quite surprised, especially since I told her that all I’ve been doing is walking to exercise. She said that the weight must have been all baby and water. I flashed back to all of those lectures from her about eating healthily and how hard it’d be to lose the baby weight! Ha! I’m pretty surprised and amazed that it came off too because I wasn’t expecting it to come off without working out. She did say that breastfeeding probably contributed a lot. I figure that if I’m burning 300 calories a day just by bfing, then no need to go to the gym (especially since I don’t the have time now). I don’t eat as much as I used to. I think my appetite shrank, especially since I have to eat fast after having Max. I think I eat twice as fast now than I did before =P. I still don’t look the same as I did before and my clothes don’t fit me the same way though. And I still can’t wear both my engagement and wedding rings at the same time =/. So once I stop pumping/breastfeeding, the 2 hours a day that will free up will be used to go workout and tone up! Lifting 20 lbs of baby several times a day has been good for my arms though =P.

2008-08-04T21:05:00.000-07:00

So who does Max look like? When he was first born, he looked like his grandfathers. Then he started looking like my Dad more. Then after a few months, he didn’t really look like anyone. But now he’s looking more and more like Hubby. Same face shape, same wrinkles under the eyes when they smile. I guess he still has my fair skin and (non-existent) eyebrows. He still doesn’t have a strong resemblance to us though.

I am a perfect 50/50 blend of my Mom and Dad. If I stand right next to them, you’d see instantly that I’m their daughter. My brother…not so much. He resembles my mother and father, but not a very strong resemblance and we don’t look like each other much ("but maybe that's a good thing", my bro's friend once said =P).

But when you look at Max’s pics and compare them with my bro’s baby pics, they look a lot alike! My relatives all tell me that first born males tend to look like their uncles on the mom’s side. It’s true for Max. Here’s an example:

My Bro…

Max…

And of course, the gene machine predicted what Max will look like and strangely enough, the result looks like my bro when he was little.

2008-07-24T21:28:00.000-07:00

I'll always be a Giants fan, but I gave up going to games as one of my luxuries (golf and concerts are other examples...I can't believe I'm not going to see Madonna again but I can't bring myself to plunk down $300). Plus I don't have hours to sit around to watch games anymore. I know they're doing bad, but this bad?

The Travelzoo Newsdesk has found this outstanding offer from
the San Francisco Giants:

SAN FRANCISCO--JULY 24, 2008-- The San Francisco Giants have
reduced ticket prices for games against the Arizona
Diamondbacks and Atlanta Braves to $8-$10.

Tickets for games on July 25-27 vs. Arizona are:
- Left field bleacher seats ... $10 (Reg. $27)
- View reserve infield seats ... $10 (Reg. $26)
- Lower box seats ... $20 (Reg. $42)

Tickets for games on Aug. 4-6 vs. Atlanta are:
- Left field bleacher seats ... $8 (Reg. $18)
- View reserve infield seats ... $8 (Reg. $20)
- Lower box seats ... $20 (Reg. $35)

To purchase and for more information, click the link below.
IMPORTANT: You must manually enter "SUMMER" and then click
continue before selecting your seats.
http://www.travelzoo.com/Newsflash.asp?441378

Remember the days when the games were always sold out because those annoying non-baseball fans went to the games because of the new park?

More Firsts

2008-07-16T21:43:00.000-07:00

There were a couple of more firsts these past two weeks. Max has teeth now! He had been drooling like crazy around 4 – 5 months, but that passed and it seems like all of the sudden he had two teeth sticking out of the gums on the bottom. This lead to his first scolding by me because he found it quite amusing to bite while nursing...yeow! I read your supposed to teach your baby that biting is unacceptable. It was the least threatening scolding ever though, haha. He just smiled back at me while I was scolding and I always melt and forgive when he does that. He hasn't done it again though, so maybe he got the message.

I’m finding that Max is getting sleepier earlier now. Yesterday we put him down for bed at 8:00 and he slept 11 hours straight! Before the longest he ever slept at night was 10 hours and that had only happened maybe 5 times. His 11 hours meant that I got to sleep longer too. A whole 7.5 hrs. I think that was the longest continuous sleep I’ve gotten since Max was born. All the books and articles I’ve read on sleep say that babies naturally want a bed time of 6 – 8pm and the best way to get the baby to sleep longer is an earlier bed time, which seems counter intuitive. All up until now his bed time had been getting earlier, but not earlier than 8:30 and we thought that if he went to bed earlier then he’d get up earlier. Not so. We put him to bed at 8:00 again tonight, hence the time to post this entry.

Yesterday we also gave Max his first haircut. His hair was all uneven. Really long on the sides, but short in the back since he had rubbed it off and it is now growing back. So we cut the hair on the sides and now he looks like a little man, hehe. His hair still sticks up on top though =P.

2008-07-07T21:16:00.000-07:00

Future pop n'locker.

max pop in lock from Jeanne Lin on Vimeo.

2008-07-06T15:52:00.000-07:00

I seriously don’t know where my free time goes these days. Well, Hubby and I have been obsessively watching Weeds non-stop (I guess you’ve all figured out by now that Hubby updates his blog more than I do, and you already know that we’ve been watching). Now that we’ve finished 3 seasons in less than two weeks (Netflix rocks! But I’m biased), I have a little more free time, which is spent doing housework. But now I have a couple of minutes to myself again, so here are some highlights of the past few weeks.

Max had his 6 month appointment with the Ped and he was 19 lbs 6 oz, 27 ½ inches, and 45 cm for head circumference. That makes him 80th, 90th, and 80th percentile
respectively. Holy cow! Not bad for a Chinese kid. He is truly a big boy. I wonder how long he’s going to keep this growth rate up (I keep saying this after every appt). We didn’t anticipate that he’d outgrown so many things so fast. No more infant car seat soon. It’s kinda sad when he has play dates with babies older than him. The other babies, which are about the same size as Max, will roll, sit up and even crawl around, but he’s the only one still playing on his back. =/ Soon enough he’ll be mobile as well. He can now roll both ways now…really. =P No more gravity assisted rolling, heh.

Hubby and I went to my company party in the Hollywood hills last weekend. We were gone for less than 24 hours because (1) I didn’t want to be away from Max any longer and (2) I didn’t want to burden anyone even more than we were going to with an overnight trip. The minute we dropped Max off at his gma’s house, I started missing him and I couldn’t stop thinking about him. But once we landed in LA, I started to relax and tried to enjoy our little getaway. I have two coworkers with young babies that went to LA as well and we compared notes on how we felt being away and asked each other how many times we called home, heh. We called to check up three or four times. I had my first drink in 14 months, which I was looking forward too. But I could only finish ¼ of my cosmo and that was it for the night =P. I also had my first coffee drink in awhile. I had to go to Coffee Bean, of course. I think the thing I miss the most since I had Max is traveling, but it’s only a self imposed limitation because I prefer not to travel with Max. Most of the new mothers I know I have already gone on cross country and even international trips with their little ones.

Max is getting over his second cold ever right now. Poor little guy. At least he’s not all stuffed up, but he kept coughing and sneezing. He actually took a 3.5 hour nap yesterday, which meant that I got to take a very much needed long nap was well.

On a non-baby note, if they’re going to bother bringing Donna, Kelly, and Brenda back to the new 90210, why not just make it with the entire original cast? I’m sure a lot of people more people would watch. They would probably be in the thirties with kids now, heh. I think I watched almost every episode when I was pregnant and on maternity leave since Soap Net airs two episodes back to back every day. I liked the Valarie era the best.

2008-06-10T22:42:00.000-07:00

does this count as a roll ? =P

2008-06-05T21:51:00.000-07:00

Ah…I finally get some free time. We’re sleep training Max right now. We decided to have Max cry it out. I must say that we’ve been pleased with the results. The first night he cried for about 30 – 45 min. Then it was less and less. Now it’s down to 15 min, but he actually falls asleep before 9 pm, down from 10 – 11 pm. It’s tough to hear him cry, but I find solace in the fact that this is for his own good to learn how to self-soothe and that he’ll eventually fall asleep. The book I read said that there’s no time limit to crying when training at night! I can’t imagine hearing him cry for an hour+. The hardest part about sleep training so far is that Max wakes up at 5:30 and that means I can’t go back to sleep. This is supposed to last 1 – 2 weeks, so I’ve been drinking green tea again at work. Oh how I missed it so. But not too much due to caffine.

And after doing some stuff around the house, which is usually washing bottles and doing laundry, I finally get some minutes to myself before bed, so I figured I’d highlight some events that happened in the past couple of weeks:

A couple of weekends ago, Hubby was feeling restless and he wanted to go to the beach with his coworkers and their dogs. I wasn’t too thrilled at the idea because we hadn’t even gone outside a 20 mile radius from our house since Max was born. I guess I didn’t feel like I was ready for a longer car trip. But I agreed because Hubby was all excited, but reluctantly when he said that we were going to Monterey! So on a whim, we packed up Max and his stuff and drove the hour and a half. (I told Hubby that it was an hour and a half trip. He said it was only 45 minutes…I was right, of course =P) We didn’t bring Pocky though because we thought it’d be too much to handle. Max did well though. He pretty much slept most of the time in the car until he was hungry, so we had to stop on our way there and back. When we got there, it was 57 degrees and foggy! It was in the 80’s back home, so we weren’t expecting cold weather. Good thing I packed a blanket. So we walked on the beach for 15 minutes and headed back home! We did stop to eat at a decent bbq place that we passed by, so we ended up staying in Monterey for an hour or so. In the end, Hubby admitted it was a bad idea, but I can’t fault him for having good intentions and wanting to have fun as a family. At least Max got to see the ocean for the first time. It was such a work out walking on the sand with him in the bjorn, but he managed to fall asleep in the fog and with waves crashing!

Hubby and I watched a movie on a Saturday afternoon, which was the first time we actually did something “fun” together since Max was born. My mom volunteered to babysit. It felt so weird for both of us to sit in the front seats of our car again. Since this was the first time we left Max at home for some alone time, I felt really guilty and I missed Max even though we were away for only 2 hours. It was a strange feeling. I don’t feel the same way when I leave him to go to work. I wonder if they were normal feelings that all first time mothers go through. The real test will be the end of this month, when Hubby and I will go to LA for one night. We’re going to my company party and since the company is paying for it, we couldn’t pass up the free trip. I decided not to bring Max because we’d have to leave him with a sitter and we’d might as well leave him at home where it’s more comfortable. If I felt bad for being away for two hours, how am I going to last a night?

My 31st birthday came and went. It seemed so insignificant and further reminded me that I’m getting old! This was the first b-day on which I actually went to work. I’d been lucky enough to be able to take vacation 7 years straight since my b-day usually falls around Memorial Day. But I figured it wouldn’t be that good if I took off when I was away from work for 5 months. But Hubby took me out to a nice dinner, which was our first date night since Max was born. I felt so old…the sitters (which were our friends J and K) were watching my kid while I went out with my Husband, heh.

Max is rolling now! He still doesn’t like tummy time and won’t roll onto his stomach. But he could he wanted to. And when he is on his tummy, he can roll over onto his back when starting from a push up position. At first he’d lean his head to the side and I think his body just followed because of the weight, hehe. I can’t wait until he can sit up by himself!

2008-05-28T13:34:00.000-07:00

I swear, Max looks a little bigger everyday. It’s a bit sad to retire his cute little clothes. Every couple of weeks I ceremoniously move his smaller clothes to the bottom drawer, and then eventually to the closet for storage. Then a mad scramble ensues to buy bigger clothes. He's now in the 6 - 12 month size, so I shouldn't need to retire clothes again soon, right???

2008-05-19T17:48:00.000-07:00

Last week was my first week back at work. Fittingly, we celebrated my last day before work with Max on Mother’s Day =) Although, it didn’t seem like it was a celebration for me since I took my Mom and Grandma’s out to brunch =P

It was a big adjustment going back to work. I had planned to get Max used to going to his Grandma’s house slowly the week before work started, but things didn’t work out as planned, so we didn’t have a test run for waking up, feeding packing up all his stuff, and going to gma’s. The first day was ok though. Surprising, I still made it to work earlier than usual! But now I wake up at 6 am vs. 7:30 pre-Max.

It was hard leaving Max, but he was all smiles at his gma’s, and all smiles when I picked him up. It was definitely harder on me than it was on him =P. His grandparents say that he’s really happy everyday during the day, which kinda makes me a bit sadder since he’s so happy without me!

The biggest adjustment though was just being at work. The first day was such a shock! I had been taking care of Max for 5 months and all of the sudden I was back at work. It took me awhile just to remember how to do my job! Now life is more complex since I have work stress again. I was also stressed after work because I felt like I had to get all of stuff done at home that I had been doing. Now I understand why people suggested going back part time or on a Thursday when things are lighter. It’s also weird to drop everything I’m doing every three hours to go pump, which takes up an hour out of my day. Now I have to be super productive.

I think I’m going to start buying lotto tickets again! =P

2008-05-07T11:50:00.002-07:00

My wedding ring fits again. YAY! I still can't wear my engagement ring though =/.

2008-05-01T21:44:00.000-07:00

Max had his 4 month appt with the Ped yesterday. He’s 17 lbs and 26 inches. He’s still in the 90th percentile for both and 75th percentile for head circumference!? The Ped said that he’s the size of a 6 month old. I wonder if he’s going to keep this growth rate up.

2008-04-27T23:32:00.001-07:00

So a couple of nights ago, I read the chapter on age 4 through 7 months from Your Baby’s First Year by the American Academy of Pediatrics and it said, “As his physical coordination improves, your baby will discover parts of his body that he never knew existed…While being diapered he may reach down to touch his genitals.” The next morning, Max did just that and he seemed very amused by it, haha. I don’t know if I’m especially proud of this first, but I guess I’m happy that he’s hitting is developmental milestones. =P

It was the best of times. It was the worst of times...

2008-04-22T16:44:00.000-07:00

Max received a lot of visitors through out last week, which was great because he loves meeting and seeing people. (It was great for me to have visitors too =) He also flirted with a baby girl in our play group. We held them up face to face and he couldn’t stop smiling and talking to her. At first she wasn’t having it, but she eventually flashed a smile and they started a conversation. Super cute!

But last week was one of the best and worst weeks so far in terms of his behavior. At the beginning of the week, he started taking naps that lasted longer than an hour (which meant that I got to do other things), ate only 5 times a day, didn’t fuss much, and slept 9 hours at night. All was well. But towards the end of the week, it seemed like Max fussed non stop, was constantly hungry, and was waking up during the middle of the night. He even woke up 3 times during one night (which was very hard on Hubby and me since we weren’t used to getting up anymore). After a couple of days of this, he fell back to his old routine, thankfully. We don’t know if it was a growth spurt or if he’s teething. But this was a reminder of what we’ve heard from other parents...Once you get used to a routine, babies may change all of the sudden and become completely different.

-----------------------

I’m happy to report that after latching problems, cracked, sore, bleeding nipples, low milk supply, Max’s tongue tie, clogged nipple pores, clogged milk ducts, and infection scares, our breastfeeding problems are finally over! A final ultrasound confirmed it. Now we have a month free of problems until I go back to work and start worrying about low milk supply again since I won’t be with Max 24/7 =(. For something that is a natural process, it sure was hard for us to get started. I have all the admiration in the world for everyone that tries to breastfeed. If you weren’t successful for some reason, at least you tried. And ladies, don’t forget to do your self breast exams!

2008-04-09T09:43:00.000-07:00

Hubby really wanted to get a pic of Max’s upset frown/cry because it's pretty cute. I reluctantly agreed to sniffle again and he got his pics. We are such cruel parents. But we were also rewarded with something new! Here’s the series of events:

Max is already upset because Hubby kept on having me sniffle several times so that he could get a good shot. Max cries and we remove him from the bumbo chair and on to my lap for a better angle.

*SNIFFLE!* Max hears the dreadful sound again from behind.

He frowns and holds the face for a second or two.

He then launches into his upset cry. Hubby and I laugh hysterically.

But then Max starts smiling…and laughing with us! His first laugh!

His laugh sounds like “huh... huh…huh…huh.”

Hubby and I are astonished! We both keep laughing to get Max to continue. I try to get a good look at Max laughing.

I then tell Hubby to hurry and get the video camera in hopes of a repeat, so we do the whole routine again. We don’t get a laugh out of him but he does smile a lot.

This kid is just a ball of emotions! I will not be making my child cry anymore. =P

Happy 3rd Anniversary to Us!

2008-04-02T18:08:00.000-07:00

Today is our third wedding anniversary. We didn’t make it to Brazilian BBQ in SF like we said we would after last year’s celebration. But Hubby took the day off and we spent a relaxing afternoon at Cheesecake Factory and walking the mall since there aren’t too many places to take an infant on a rainy day. My mom offered to baby sit so that we can have date night, but Hubby and I feel bad for burdening people.

It’s not hard to remember birthdays and anniversaries at our house. Hubby and I first started going out together on Veteran’s Day. Our wedding rehearsal was on April Fool’s Day. Hubby’s birthday is on Valentines Day and my b-day usually falls on Memorial Day weekend. Max’s b-day is on New Year’s Eve. Even Pocky’s b-day usually falls on Thanksgiving.

2008-03-26T22:40:00.000-07:00

I realized something the other day. Nothing profound or anything. I’m sure you’re probably thinking, "duh, jennay!" But I realized that life will never be the same after having kids because they continuously grow and you experience new things with them almost every day. I came to this conclusion because it was hard for me to remember what life was like before Max came. I asked Hubby “what did we used to do???” as we were going to bed at 12:30 am on a Saturday night when before we had Max we’d go to bed around 3am. Life was pretty much the same for a long time since Hubby and I moved in together. Everything is just so different now, but in a good way. Although Max's and my routine is about the same everyday, there's something new to experience each day. And then before we know it, Max will become a toddler and we'll probably have another kid, which will change the family dynamic. The kids will start going to elementary school, become a teenagers, then adults....get married...we'll have grandkids... Life will never be the same again.

2008-03-16T23:09:00.000-07:00

I also discovered a way to make Max cry =( He was sitting on my lap facing away from me when my nose was stuffy. I sniffed really loud and he started crying. I picked him up and made him face me so that he could see that it was me that made that noise and I did it again. He then frowned and slowly started his upset cry. Although his frown is really cute, I'm not going to make him cry again just to snap a pic =P.

The other day we were in the car and he was cranky sitting in his car seat. All of the sudden he stopped fussing and just had this grumpy look on his face and stared straight ahead. It was really cute and funny, as if he was telling us "I'm so pissed that I'm not even going to cry." Again, no pic.

2008-03-09T00:39:00.000-08:00

I discovered a way to get Max to smile consistently. I recline in my rocker and hold him up so that he’s facing me and standing on me while I smile at him and make funny faces. Here’s the result:

2008-03-06T23:12:00.000-08:00

I went to my “breastfeeding friendly” surgeon (as lactation consultants call them) again and got another ultrasound done and nothing showed up, but there’s still a lump. Although, it’s gotten considerably smaller since my last appointment, which is good because the surgeon said he’s been holding off on a biopsy since I’m nursing. He said that “usually bad things don’t get smaller.” But he told me to go back in a month and hopefully it will be completely gone. I can’t wait for this to be over with because I won’t feel completely healed from childbirth until it’s resolved.

On another note, I’m really digging instant viewing on Netflix. It’s so much easier and faster than turning on the TV, putting in a DVD in the PS and fast forwarding through all of the previews (yes, I am that lazy =P). And I can watch 10 minutes here and there and pause overnight if I need to, which I do now since Max is with me and I can't really sit down for 2 hrs at a time.

Two Months

2008-03-02T23:25:00.000-08:00

Max had his two month appt on Feb 29. He was 13 lbs 11oz and 24 inches! That puts him in the 90th percentile for both, and he was in the 75th percentile for head circumference, which prompted the Ped to say that he was nicely proportioned and as big as a 3.5 mo yr old! Max is a big boy!

The last month was very different from the first month. In terms of his development, he started cooing and he now smiles in a social sense. It’s really cute! He flashes his smile for his grandparents the most. I think he likes hearing Chinese because of the different inflections and tones. While the Ped was examining him, he demonstrated all of his developmental advances such as the cooing and smiling, pushing up on his feet, and noticing his hands...all within a couple of minutes. I think he was trying to impress her =P

As for adjusting to life with baby, it's getting better. The first month was stressful and not very enjoyable because Max and I were stuck at home recuperating and getting breastfeeding down. That period is such a blur to me now, and it wasn’t even that long ago! But then breastfeeding got a lot better, partly due to the domperidone I was taking and I think my body has learned to produce enough for him since I stopped taking it. He only eats 5 times a day now. Hubby feeds him a bottle right before we put him to sleep around midnight and he now sleeps 6 – 8 hrs. But I don’t sleep that long. Max will make a lot of noise starting around 4 or 5 am and every hour on the hour after that until he fully wakes up. It’s like a snooze alarm, heh. But I’ve been able to get through the days without naps, which has been a huge leap forward for me. He had been sleeping in the bugaboo bassinette in our room until we remodeled our master bath and decided to move Max to his own room and the crib last week due to the dust. Plus he was wiggling his way down the bassinette and I’d wake up to find him all scrunched up at the bottom end. He doesn’t seem to mind sleeping alone, which is great for us because we all get more sleep. I finally realized that every time he made noise when he was sleeping, he wasn’t fully awake and I feed him when he could have slept through…another breakthrough. He truly is a golden piglet…likes to eat and sleep.

It’s a good thing that I stopped taking the domperione because I still have what I think is a clogged milk duct, which could lead to an infection. It has gotten considerably smaller since then though. But the surgeon I’ve been seeing wants me to check in with him until it’s completely gone to rule out any unusual growth (i.e., a tumor). But things are looking good and looks like I won’t need to get it drained. eeeeEEEeee. However, now that my body has learned to make just enough milk, I don’t have the over supply that I was experiencing for awhile while taking the drug. If I would have known that this would happen, then I would have pumped more during that time to build up a freezer stash because now I don’t get nearly the amount I used to pump. This is another lesson learned.

So since we weren’t confined to the house anymore, we ventured out. Our first outing was to BJ’s for lunch with my family to celebrate my bro’s 35th birthday who was visiting from Dubai. It’s close to our house and I knew that if we went early, we’d avoid the lunch crowd. Max slept the whole time! It was nerve racking though because Hubby and I though he’d get fussy at any minute, but he did great. It was also Chinese New Year, so we had dinner at the Grandparents’ house. Again, he did great. Then we went for a walk to the park near our house with Pocky, M, S, and C. Hubby was really excited to go we really enjoyed the leisurely. Kinda surreal since we were walking to the park with M and S and our babies! It’s too bad that we had such bad weather during Feb, or else we would have gone walking more. I’ve been walking with him in the baby bjorn on weekdays. Then it we had his Red Egg and Ginger party. Again, he slept almost the whole time! As his grandparents’ say, he gives face by not fussing in front of other people, heh. It was great for me to see people again, especially since most of them I had turned away during the first month because I wasn’t up for visitors. Max had a great time too meeting the 4 other babies there. This past weekend, Hubby and I then went to Hobbee’s with just Max and we enjoyed our breakfast, but we ate fast because we were afraid that he would get fussy. We also did our first errand as a family…went to Pet Smart to get Pocky’s food. Baby steps…

I also started going to my weekly new mothers support group meetings at El Camino Hospital. I needed to get out of the house and I wanted to learn more about baby care. Again, Max slept almost the whole time while all the other babies fussed during the first class. =) Hearing what other mothers were going through, I thanked my lucky stars because Max is sooo much better eating and sleeping wise. He’s pretty easy so far.

So, the things that prevents us from taking Max outside the house more often are: 1. the weather 2. cold season 3. fear of him getting fussy and 4. breastfeeding. We’ve had a lot of rainy days since he was born but when its nice outside, we take advantage of it by taking walks. We’ve tried to avoid going to public places because its cold season, but that will be over soon. Fear of fussiness…he’s been pretty good so far. We just have to relax when he’s out. He doesn't really fuss that much, but we don't want to experience a melt down. Breastfeeding…I think this is the biggest hurdle. He eats every 3 hours, which gives us a window to do things. I just can’t imagine breastfeeding in public. Although I feel like a ton of people have seen my boobs already (and I think Hubby accidentally leaked some pics of me breastfeeding!) all those people were either used to it or were medical professionals. Even if I were to use something to cover up, it would just feel so awkward…although it shouldn’t! I’ve talked to other new mothers who felt the same way, so they’ve given me tips like going back to the car, going into a dressing room, or using mother lounges like at Nordstrom and Babies r Us. I just don’t know if I could do it out in the open, like my sister-in-law, who breastfed while eating out at restaurants. But as Jon and Kate (plus 8) says, you can either go out or stay home and stare at the walls.

2008-02-17T17:43:00.001-08:00

This is cool! I had thought I visted more places though. I kinda cheated and included places where I had a stop over (Missouri, Kansas, Taiwan, Sri Lanka). As you see, I don't really have a desire to visit South America. Maybe Brazil one day. I feel really fortunate to have visited so many places. I still need to go to Greece and see the rest of Japan and I'll be content.

Getting Back to Normal

2008-02-04T11:28:00.000-08:00

In an attempt to return to normalcy, I ventured out and went to the bank and went grocery shopping since it has been four weeks and the dr. gave me the ok to drive. It felt really weird driving again and just being outside was a nice change.

I tried on my wedding and engagement rings and they don’t quite fit yet! =( I was hoping that my fingers got fatter from just water retention, but nope. I know some people who grew a ring size after being pregnant, which I didn’t know could happen after I got pregnant. Even if I lost all of the baby weight, would it affect my ring size? I really hope I don’t have to get my eternity band resized, but I think it can be done but it’s not easy. Foolish me for not thinking of this when we bought our rings! And I think my feet are still bigger, which I also know happens to a lot of women after pregnancy. An excuse to get new shoes =)

I’m happy to report that breastfeeding is getting better. But I now have what I think is another clogged duct. Hopefully it will go away on it’s own like the last ones because I’m not looking forward to getting it drained by the surgeon, and I still don’t know how that’s done exactly. eeeeeEEeeeee… I love it when Max get's "milk drunk" to the point where he's so satisfied that he looks and acts drunk, teehee. It's so funny. You can lift his arm and it flops right down and he sometimes has his mouth open with milk dribbling out while he's falling asleep. hehe

Happy One Month B-day!

2008-01-31T23:52:00.000-08:00

We celebrated Max's one month birthday by having dinner with my family. This also marked the end of my reh zi, although my mom says I should ease back into normal life. She still forbids me to go out in the rainy weather we've been having and doesn't let me drink a cold drink. But how did I celebrate the one month passing? By getting some Pizza Chicago and I had a soda, caffine free of course.

I can't wait until Max's red egg and ginger party in a week! It will be his debut to all the vistors that I had turned away during the past month =( I'm excited to see everyone and introduce Max. It'll also force me to make myself look presentable, heh. I'll finally change out of my "house clothes." I haven't worn contacts in two months!

Breastfeeding

2008-01-30T12:48:00.000-08:00

I was sitting at kitchen table last night finishing my dinner while Hubby was holding Max. I said to Hubby that I don’t particularly enjoy breastfeeding and all of the sudden I look at Max and his head is turned and he’s staring right at me! Haha…maybe I offended him? =/

I know there’s a lot of mothers out there that enjoy breastfeeding because it’s good bonding time. I do like the bonding time with Max, but I’d rather play with him or cuddle with him and bond in different ways. I do want him to have all of the benefits of breast milk, but he sometimes hangs out there for over an hour (still swallowing, so he's not just sucking for pleasure). I can’t imagine breastfeeding in public yet and I know pumping is not a sustainable solution. I keep thinking that it’d be so much nicer if we, or anyone else, can give him a bottle at any time. I know that it takes about 6 weeks before breastfeeding becomes enjoyable for both baby and mother, especially when the baby becomes a better nurser. Again, this is one of my post partum feelings that I’m dealing with. I keep asking myself if I’m a bad mother for feeling this way. But, as I am learning, everything gets better with time.

By the way, Max is now 11 lbs 5 oz and can eat over 5 oz at a time! He sleeps 4 - 5 hours at night though. Not bad for a 1 month old!

Part 3 - Brining Home Baby...dah da da dah da da dah

2008-01-24T09:01:00.000-08:00

Where do those parents on Brining Home Baby (on TLC) find the time to be interviewed during the first 36 hours??!

I couldn’t believe that Max was finally home. More so, I couldn’t believe that we were responsible for this baby on our own now. It was great having nurses there to ask questions or take over swaddling or diaper changing when we couldn’t get the hang of it. Being at home was just so different.

Max wasn’t fussy at all the first two days, which we were told would be expected because he was still recovering from the ordeal in the hospital. He didn’t cry, and again we thought this is great! We introduced him to Pocky, our bulldog. At first Pocky was really curious, jumping on us as we held him. And she would also exhibit some jealously traits. When people would come over, they would go straight to the baby and not acknowledge her, so she would jump on whoever was holding Max. But after the first two days or so, Pocky really settled down and now just chills with us and the baby and watches me pump. She still gets excited when new people come over, but I don’t think that’ll ever change. She has matured a lot though since Max has been with us and we’ve pretty impressed. As long as she knows you, like my Mom since she’s over so much, she’s not hyper around you. We also thing that Pocky exhibits some defensive and protective qualities, since it seems that she’s watching out for Max when she senses something’s up.

We enjoyed our two days of quietness, but I was still exhausted. The lactation consultants all said to breastfeed Max and then pump for 15 min to build up my milk supply. So I would feed him, Hubby would burp him and feed him a supplement via bottle of 2 – 3 oz while I would go pump and finish by washing all of the pump parts and bottles. And we did this at least 8 times in a 24 hour period. It was so tiring, especially since this whole cycle would last over an hour and I’d only have an hour or two for a break, during which I was expected to nap if I could. I always felt rushed to do everything, especially eating, since I’d have such a short window before Max needed to eat again. Since Max was still sleepy all the time, I had to wake him up so that he could eat. This is when I started getting emotional, and the hormonal changes kicked in. I cried every day for a week and a half. Sometimes out of happiness since Max was home, but most of the time out of sadness. I really wanted to breastfeed him and not give formula, but my supply hadn’t caught up to his demand. So I’d worry and stress and felt so insecure, and at times I wanted to give up and just feed formula because it’d be so much easier. (With breastfeeding, you can estimate in a couple ways how much a baby is eating, but you never know for sure. You know with a bottle though). I felt so bitter. If only I didn’t have a c-section and Max wasn’t held up in the NICU with jaundice, things would be so much different and normal. But I kept telling myself that I was doing the best I could. If I couldn’t breastfeed, then formula would have to do. It was good enough for our generation and we turned out fine. (Breast milk has been linked to higher IQs and the antibodies protect the baby from infection better). It was very disheartening though, so I would keep on pumping and completing the feeding cycle. Hubby was very supportive during this time, reassuring me that I was doing the best that I could and that I shouldn’t blame myself. The exhaustion also made me emotional. I wasn’t fully recovered yet and breast feeding burns 900 calories a day. I would just cry because I was tired.

The day after we brought Max home, we went to his first pediatrician appointment. He was already 9 lbs 3 oz, almost his birth weight! The Ped said that he was doing great now. She also said that the jaundice was caused by a couple of things: an immature liver, my breast milk not coming in fast enough; and the nurses didn’t realize that he was getting dehydrated probably because he was so big (sure, blame it on the nurses). The Ped also repeated what everyone else had been saying: Breastfeed, pump 15 min at least 8 times during the day. As long as he’s gaining .5 – 1 oz per day, then he’s good.

I quickly learned that every time we went out, I was missing out on crucial prime napping time and it just made me more exhausted. I wasn’t even supposed to step out of the house because of the one month period (I had to wear a big jacket with a hood every time so that my skin wouldn’t come into contact with cold air). Again, I had to go out for an appointment on the next day (Tuesday), this time to see my OB who was finally back. I had called her because I found some lumps in my arm pits. One of them was the size of a marble and I thought they were enlarged lymph nodes. She had me come in for a breast check and she said that it was probably blocked milk ducts in axially breast tissue. Who new that the breast tissue went as far as below your arms? She wasn’t sure though and she referred me to yet another specialist, this time it was a surgeon and she said to have him do an ultrasound on the lump. If anything, he would probably have to drain the clogged duct, which I had no idea how that procedure was going to be done. I made an appt for Thursday, but I didn’t freak out about it because the OB said wasn’t a big deal, but had to be taken care of. They took my weight and I had already lost 18 lbs, which prompted the OB say that the weight gain was all baby.

We also had to take Max to the hospital, which was across the street, for another blood test so we brought him along and showed him off at the OB’s office. Then back to the NICU, who then told us to go to the lab on the other side of the hospital, which wasted another half hour and prevented him from eating on schedule, which just got me all upset. Then we had to watch as they pricked his foot yet again. (His hand were all bruised from the IV and he had multiple scabs on his feet from all the blood tests. They take blood from a baby by pricking the foot and then just collecting the drops) and I just started crying, again, because I felt bad for him since he was probably hungry and on top that having blood drawn. Finally, the ordeal was over, Max was still sleepy and we were on our way home so that I could feed him.

By the time I went to the surgeon, the lumps were considerably smaller. So, again…another specialist and probably a $200+ bill coming my way for something that was nothing. And another missed nap. He did do an ultrasound and didn’t find anything abnormal so the duct must have unclogged itself. Probably because I took showers, which you’re not supposed to do during the one month period of healing. But showers also helped my sore and cracked nipples too, so I keep on taking them. It was good to have peace of mind and not have to worry about yet another problem. Isn’t weird how I had non-problematic pregnancy? It couldn’t have gone any better, but the birth and recovery has been filled with problems?

I was so tired by the end the week that I don’t even know how I was functioning. We decided that the current feeding cycle wasn’t sustainable and something needed to change. As P and C said, this was a family of 3 and not just Max, so we have to do what’s best for everyone. We increased the amount of times between feedings to 3 hours, which Max seemed fine with. It just didn’t make sense to me. He never seemed hungry. The rule is a baby eats 2.5 oz for every pound and it seemed like we were giving him way more than that just with the supplements alone. On Friday, we decided to go back to the hospital since they have a lactation resource center. We decided that we should weigh Max to see if he was gaining weight sufficiently. We also did the weigh-feed-weigh, where you weight the baby then feed him and then weigh again so that you know how much the intake is. We had done it twice when Max was in the NICU. We weighed him and the scale showed that he lost two ounces since the Ped appointment! We also figured that he was taking in about 1.6 oz. We decided to keep doing what we’re doing and we’ll ask the Ped next wed during the 2 week appointment about the new feeding plan. We also decided to buy our own scale because who knew if the scales that we used were accurate (turns out that they weren’t and we were freaked out for no reason). So the cycle continued and I politely turned away visitors that wanted to come during the weekend since I was beyond exahusted.

On the following Monday, it was back to the OB’s office for a wound check. The incision had healed nicely, but the OB was more concerned that I look exhausted. She gave me some advice, being a mom with a new baby herself. She also prescribed Domperidone for me since I told her about the low milk supply. This stuff is expensive and not covered by my insurance, but I figured I should try everything I could, even though it doesn’t work for some people like herself. I think it’s working pretty well because my milk supply is up. I reached a personal best last night… 5.75 oz who hoo! Took my weight again and I had lost 20 lbs!

On Wed, we went to Max’s 2 week check up with the Ped. He gained a pound since the week before! 10 lbs 4 oz (which meant that the scale at the lactation center was off and it made us paranoid for nothing that he wasn’t gaining weight.) He was in the 95th percentile for weight and height, and 85th percentile for head circumference, which makes me think that we were actually over feeding him (a baby will keep sucking away with a bottle because it’s in his mouth and he doesn’t know what else to do) That morning, we discovered that Max can sleep 5 hours at night, which we told the Ped, and she said that’s fine. “Let him sleep. He’s a good eater.” We also said we wanted to change the feeding plan, and she was all for it. As long as Max was gaining weight, we can try all sorts of feeding plans. This was great news and such a relief. We started to try breast feeding exclusively during the day, and a bottles at night time so that I could get some rest (although I still had to pump at night when I missed a feeding by us giving him a bottle) and to top him off so that he’d sleep longer. (Formula digests more slowly, which is why formula fed babies can go longer in between feedings. If we didn’t have any expressed breast milk left, we’d give formula. And I always have someone else feed him the bottle, because babies get confused if the breastfeeding mom offers a bottle. But this will have to change once I won’t have my support people around like Hubby.)

Immediately I was more relaxed and we all felt better. No more watching the clock and pumping all the time. Max was hungry and I didn’t have to wake him up to eat. Although, I still worry if he’s getting enough when I breastfeed. Ever since he was introduced to a bottle, it was a slippery slope. Now hopefully if he breastfeeds all the time, he’ll become a better nurser and won’t be as lazy of an eater now that a bottle isn’t there all the time. Hubby and I got into a routine. He’d take care of Max from 9 pm and I while I went to bed, but waking up for pumping, and I would take over in the morning and Hubby would fall asleep. Now he’s maybe eating 20% formula and 80% breast milk. Before it was 60/40.

We did have help ever since we brought Max home though. Since my mom is working and couldn’t come to help out, she hired a nanny that specialized in the one month healing process. Originally, Hubby and I didn’t want help because we wanted to experience the hardships of parenthood and earn our stripes and we’d felt awkward because the nanny would live with us for a month. Supposedly, I wouldn’t have to lift a finger and I’d stay in bed all day and the nanny would bring the baby to me for feedings. The nanny would also cook all the food I’d had to eat to heal and increase milk supply. Well, since I had a c-section, we didn’t know if I’d be out of commission, so we agreed to have the nanny during the day and she’d go home after dinner. The nanny had actually lived with my cousins who had a baby a few months ago. At first, it was awkward having her in the house. She was nice, but I couldn’t really communicate well with her because my Mandarin isn’t that good and she had a thick Taiwanese accent. And she would cook the same food all the time. The first couple of days, all she did was cook and no baby care. We just thought she was getting acclimated. But eventually, she started helping out with the baby more and more. And then about a week and a half, she all of the sudden said that she had to go to Taiwan immediately to take care of some stuff and just left us high and dry. We thought this was really shady. For something as important as the one month, how can she just split? She said sorry, but we felt that she could have at least referred someone else or not charge the full amount. Luckily, my Aunt was available to help for the rest of the month. It feels so much better to have a family member help take care of me and Max. And my Aunt’s cooking is way better. It was the first time I felt full since I was in the hospital. Lesson #10: It’s really nice to have help. I don’t know what I would have done if I didn’t have anyone helping. Having a newborn at home is a lot harder than I had ever thought it’d be. Hubby goes back to work next week. He’s been a big help too. He’s been doing all the housework, making multiple trips to Babies R Us, and help taking care of Max with me. A week ago I was thinking that if both my support people leave at the same time, what am I going to do? But now with this more relaxed schedule, I’m a little more confident that I can handle Max on my own. It’s weird to think that I haven’t been left alone with him yet! But I asked my Aunt to come over next week just to have a smoother transition.

What was even a bigger help was all of the advice that was given to us by other new parents (lesson # 9). Thankfully, we know a few that have gone through some of the same things. It was really reassuring to hear other people’s experiences and opinions, especially since all of the medical professions kept saying the same thing, which wasn’t working out for us. Their experiences made us more confident that we were making the right decisions for our family and they made us realized that this is a family 4 (with Pocky) and not just a family of 1. Also, we learned that some things suggested by medical professionals should just be taken as suggestions. Thanks so much to all of the parents we talked to! It really helped a lot.

During this time, I also got closer to my Mom. Now we can relate together as mothers. She told me all about what it was like with me and my brother as newborns (my bro caused her more grief, heh). She said that having a child was so much harder in Taiwan. She has to sleep in the hallway of the hospital because it was full and there was no heat! I was born at El Camino Hospital and the experience was much better for her there. She also explained that she really wanted to have more kids, especially coming from a family of 7 kids, but didn’t have the support available when she moved to the states. =( She wants me to have 3 kids, at least! I think that explains why one day when I was in jr high and while she was dropping me off at school, she asked me what I thought about her adopting a child out of the blue. At the time I didn’t know what to think about that, but it makes more sense to me now.

The Ped was our last appointment, so no more stressful outings. The only other big thing that happened was Max’s growth spurt. He was due, being around 3 weeks of age. He just was crying all the time, wanting to eat every 1.5 hours. It was tough on Hubby’s night shift and at first we weren’t sure that it was a growth spurt. After two days, Max seems to be back on his reliable 3 hour schedule (I swear, it’s like clockwork. Every 3 hours and bam! He’s hungry again). Going through that period was an ordeal in its own, and we’ll get to look forward to it every three weeks or so.

So that’s about it so far. Max is gaining weight and Hubby and I are getting some rest that we've been lacking since 12/31. Thanks for all of your support! It has been tough, but every new parent goes through things like this...All part of life’s experiences. I’m sure we’ll look back on this period and say that was the hardest thing we’ve ever done in our lives, but we got through it. Now the next step for us is to establish breastfeeding, have Max sleep longer (!), and figure out what life will be like Hubby goes back to work while I stay home until the second week of May. I’ll keep ya posted.

Part 2 - Recovery and the NICU

2008-01-21T10:34:00.000-08:00

By the time I made it to the maternity room and was settled, it was already around 11. I was still receiving pitocin through my IV, I think to help my uterus shrink. Max was brought into the room and we had a choice to room in (let the baby sleep in the room with us all night) or feed on demand (baby goes back to nursery and is brought to the room when he wakes up hungry so that he can breast feed). We decided on demand so that I could recover. We actually choose on demand every night, but kept Max with us during the day. I was looking to a restful night, but not so. Every 2 hours or so, a nurse would come into the room and take my vital signs and check my bleeding down there. I was told to breathe deeply from time to time since the epidural could suppress breathing. Scary! And pump for the compression cuffs would make noise every time they’d fill with air. Every 6 hours, a nurse would bring me a pill for the pain, which was just a stronger form of Motrin since I really did not want to take vicodin. The pain wasn’t that bad. Only when I moved I’d feel pain. But my eyes would always light up when I knew it was pill time, heh. Each day at 9, my OB would do rounds and check my incision and every couple of hours, Max’s nurse would check on him take his temperature. So I got used to a lot of people coming into the room unannounced. By the way, I asked two different OBs why Max was so unexpectedly big. The first OB said that I may have developed gestational diabetes after I had my screening that was taken during the 27th week of pregnancy (the result was normal). She said that since my family has a history of diabetes, that I may develop it and so will Max. So that completely freaked me out, although it was never a surprise that I could have diabetes. But it’s not the kind of thing you want to hear right after you have your new baby. She also said it could be genetics if my family has a history of big babies. The second OB said that it probably wasn’t gestational diabetes. Babies are just getting bigger and she said that maybe I was just built to have bigger babies. Yikes! I’ve heard that the second is bigger than the first.

Before I knew it, it was almost midnight and I turned on the tv to watch the new year’s countdown with Hubby. And I was finally allowed to drink clear liquids in the early morning. Yay! Each day of recovery in the hospital had different milestones. The first day after the c-section, you can eat solids if you’re digestive system is up for it. You sit up in bed, and try to stand, which I did and immediately felt light headed, so I had to sit back down. You get a sponge bath (a very humbling experience since you have to depend on your nurse to give you the bath while you’re connected to all these tubes). You sit in a chair and try to go for walk so that you heal faster. Again, felt dizzy during the walk. The second day is when the IV and the catheter come out, so you’re no longer tied down. And you go for a further walk. The third day, you’re allowed to take a shower, which felt sooo good. The fourth day, you get your staples taken out. And all there is on the fifth day is going home.

From day 1, my reh zi started, which is a period of one month of healing. Chinese people believe that it takes a month to heal from pregnancy and childbirth, during which all of your hot energy was depleted. To heal during that first month and regain your chi, you have to avoid anything cold like cold foods (including most fruits and veggies), and cold air. You have to eat hot foods such as soup and keep covered. The food was delivered to the hospital. Since my Mom is still working, she hired a nanny who specializes in the reh zi to cook the certain foods I was supposed to eat. The nanny also came over to our house everyday after we came home from the hospital to cook and take care of the baby and to make sure I rested, because you’re not even supposed to go up and down stairs or even get out of bed (more on this later). Well, I cheated in the hospital because my gown wasn’t long sleeved and my legs were exposed and I took a shower, but it was very controlled shower and I avoided contact with cold air. I’m still taking showers right now. It just makes me feel so much better afterwards.

During this time, we had Max in the room with us during the day. Max didn’t fuss or cry much during the first two days. We thought, this is great! But slowly he became less sleepy and started to exercise his lungs. My mom loved to hold Max and she seemed to calm him down the best. I also would try to breastfeed him, which was not natural to me. I couldn’t get Max to latch on well and in no time I had sore and cracked nipples. It was pretty painful (and still hurts). I had to have him brought over to me every time because I couldn’t lift him up on my own or else my incision area would start hurting, which was disheartening since I couldn’t lift my own baby. I was able to pick him up myself without much pain starting on day 4. It was a good thing that he was so big since I’d always been baby phobic. Having a newborn that didn’t look like a newborn helped me overcome fears of breaking him, heh. Hubby got a lot of practice holding Max, changing his diapers, and perfecting the swaddle though. To this day Hubby is better at taking care of Max than me. We couldn’t figure out who he looks like. He looks more like Hubby, but he definitely has my (nonexistent) eyebrows and wavy hair. Although I didn’t have much hair when I was born. He sometimes looks like one grandfather or the other. I’m guessing he’s going to be pretty tall since he was so big and I have many family members that are over 6 feet.

I did have some visitors during this time. My mom stayed with me during the day everyday and Hubby stayed with me day and night. Since day 2 was New Year’s Day and everyone had the day off, a couple of people asked if they can visit. But I had to turn them away because I was still out of it and couldn’t even walk. But my in-laws came to visit and Max met his aunties and cousins. Day 3 was much better I wasn’t connected to tubes anymore and my Grandma met her second great grandchild with my Aunt. Hubby’s extended family also came. More people wanted to come, but we politely turned them away. During this time, I also received a lot of phone calls, especially since I hadn’t updated people about if I’d even delivered yet. But I turned off my phone because I got a lot of calls and I wasn’t really up to talking since I was still out of it. Just trying to rest and concentrate on getting better. Lesson #8: It’s great that people want to visit you and the new baby while you’re still in the hospital, but that is really a time for recuperation.

It was great having him in the room, but we noticed that he was getting fussier, yellowier, and it seemed that he was dehydrated (which Grant asked a nurse about the dehydration but she dismissed it). Pretty soon, he was inconsolable. He was also loosing a lot of weight and didn't look like his chubby self as he did when he was delivereled. His weight dropped dramatically from 9lbs 4 oz to 8 lbs 1 oz. He was developing jaundice. The pediatrician and the nurses noticed it, but wanted my milk to come in because the more he drank, the more he’d poop and the more it would flush out his system. My milk came in on day 3 as expected, but he wasn’t nursing well enough and he got worse and worse (again, waiting for things to resolve naturally. See lesson #5). They took a bilirubin test on day 5, the day were supposed to be discharged, and the level was 19.6. 20 is when the doctor really starts to worry. The nurses whisked Max away and quickly gave him formula so that he would eat and put him under UV lights in the Nursery. Hubby and I saw him under the lights from outside the nursery window. The seriousness of it all was forgotten for a second because Max was lying under the lights with foam sunglasses on all sprawled out. He looked like he was on a tanning bed getting a tan. There were a couple of other babies there too under the lights. The neonataologist then informed us that he would be going to the NICU. Although jaundice is common (babies with jaundice are called bili babies), it is still serious because it could result in brain damage if untreated. Max wasn’t quite in the danger zone yet, but he had to be treated immediately and give fluids via IV, which the Nursery couldn’t do. Also, the nurse to baby ratio in the NICU is 1 to 3 instead of 8 to 3. So day 5 was supposed to be a very happy day and we planned on leaving at noon. But since Max was taken away, I stayed in our maternity room until 8 pm, check out time. Earlier in the day, I was introduced to the hospital grade breast pump and a lactation consultant. I had already been seen by a few lactation consultants, but since I thought I couldn’t hurt, I requested to set up a consulting session. A social worker also came, probably because all parents get a visit if their baby is taken to the NICU and their mental health is evaluated. I at that point wasn’t freaking out. She had asked me how I felt and I said fine and she saw that I was eating, so she left a booklet on the NICU and left.

At 8:00, I was discharged and the nurse wheeled me over in a wheel chair to the NICU on the other side of the building, although I had walked there several times by that time. We were provided a parents’ room, which was not as luxurious as the maternity room, and we were going to stay there so I could feed Max whenever he woke up. But the dr. said that it didn’t look like he’d be waking up often because he was tired from the lights. The dr. that was on shift also started freaking us out. He explained that jaundice could lead to brain damage and Max would have to get another hearing test to ensure that his hearing didn’t suffer. I think the dr. just wanted to be straightforward with us because the nurses and the Pediatrician said that the level wasn’t at that point where we had to worry about that. We wanted to know when he could go home, but we didn’t get a straight answer. Maybe tomorrow, maybe 48 hours. It just depended on when his bilirubin level went down. They put the IV in him to give him fluids because he was severely dehydrated. It was tough to see him under the lights connected to monitors and tubes. And even tougher to listen to him cry when the put the IV in. We went back to the parents’ room and I just lost it. The gravity of the situation, and the fact that I was still recovering just became overwhelming. I wanted to stay in the room in case Max woke up because I wanted to do everything I could for him. Hubby rationally suggested that we go home to get some rest at home because it wouldn’t do us any good to stay in the room. I agreed because I was exhausted and we stopped off at Walgreens at 12:30 to fill up my pain med prescription before going home. Finally, my first steps out of the hospital after 5 days.

Although we went home, I didn’t get much rest. I had to pump to express milk every time Max was supposed to breastfeed so that I could build up my milk supply. The first time I pumped was in the parents’ room and I left the bottles with the nurse. I was pumping .5 – 1oz and Max was already being supplemented with 2 – 3 oz of formula. So catching up to Max’s demand was a tall order. Every time you miss a feeding because of supplementation, you have to pump. You also pump after every session of breastfeeding to trick your brain into producing more milk. Nature is so cruel. A lot of people go through the low milk supply issue, so renting a hospital grade pump is very common. Almost everyone I talked to had to. I’d pump every 2 hrs day and night for 15 minutes at a time. My nipples were blistered beforehand from Max not latching on correctly. Max has a short frenulem (sp?), which is another word for tongue tied, so it made latching on hard. I think that still affects breastfeeding today. One of my nipples was bleeding so one of the bottles of milk was tinged pink with blood, which was still ok for Max to take.

We went back to the NICU at around 9:30 am after calling them to ask if Max was due for a feeding. His bilirubin level after spending the night was still at 16.9. 12 is considered low risk, so he had to spend another night. I breastfed him, and of course he needed more, so we also gave him a bottle of formula. We went back home because he wasn’t going to wake up for another 3 or 4 hours. I finally got some sleep after Hubby and I conked out on the couch while we waited for my Mom to bring lunch. We ate and went back and stayed there until dinner, just visiting him from time to time, pumping, and feeding him. The UV lights make you nauseous if you look at them for too long, so we didn’t stay with him the whole time. Then another night of pumping started again.

The next day, Sunday, we went to the NICU in the morning and got some great news. He was getting taken off the IV fluids and his bilirubin level was 12, which meant that we could probably take him home in the afternoon if he did well off the fluids. We also watched him take his third and final hearing test and he passed. We were so excited and it gave me a burst of energy. So we fed him again and the nurse said she’d call us when he woke up. While we were there, the nurse started quizzing us on baby care, making sure that we knew what we were doing, like what is a normal body temperature, how to prevent SIDS, and do you have car seat. The nurses are required to evaluate how much we knew. This nurse, which another one that we really liked, also went over breastfeeding and gave us tips….tummy to tummy…boob sandwich, which she demonstrated by putting her hands up near her head and bending to the side, haha. She also shared her experience of having a 9 lbs baby, being a tiny Asian woman that had to be on bed rest because her body couldn’t support all the weight when she was pregnant! We went home for lunch and an hour later, we got a call saying that Max can finally go home! Hubby and I were so happy and excited! We went to the NICU and a different nurse discharged us. She again quizzed us and helped gather all of Max’s hospital belongings and gave us some formula to get started at home. Again, this nurse shared her own personal experience because she had a bili baby and also supplemented with formula. Lesson #9 It was nice to hear other people’s experiences because it reassured me that I was doing the right thing. (This lesson comes again after I brought home Max). I put on Max’s going home outfit, which was a bear suit from Gap that I splurged on. We were afraid that it wouldn’t fit, but luckily it did. I will never again buy a $40 baby outfit. But seeing Max in it was all worth it because it was so cute! Hubby and I couldn’t stop giggling as Max just lied there with arms next to his head and he looked like he was smiling. We strapped him into the car seat and I was wheeled out in a wheelchair with the car seat in my lap. We put him in the car and I just started crying again, this time out of extreme happiness since we were finally going to all be home together.

I think my recovery was sped up 10 fold since I had to sober up for Max and go to the NICU often. I was up and walking around by day 5; sometimes feeling weak and dizzy because I became very anemic from the pregnancy and c-section. I’m still taking prescription iron supplements now, which along with no driving for 4 weeks, was part of my discharge orders. But the pain wasn’t that bad. I still took my pain meds, but only for 1.5 weeks after I got home. Once and awhile, there’s a tinge of pain, but really not that noticeable. I hear that some women are in pain for a whole month after a c-section. I do wear a post-partum support belt though because as part of the one month healing processes, you’re supposed to wrap that area to make that area shrink faster. Plus my back and shoulders were sore from bending over so much. Only just yesterday did my body feel tired. I wasn’t sleepy tired, but my body felt wore out. Hopefully that passes.

Ok, that’s part 2. Part 3 coming soon! Geez, I can’t believe how long these entries are!

I have a 10 pound 2 week old!

2008-01-18T21:34:00.000-08:00

I’m a walking zombie right now. Very sleep deprived, but happy that my Little Man (no longer calling him Junior) is home. As part of my recovery and to avoid the dreaded post partum depression symptoms, I figured that I should express my emotions and keep a memoir of my time in the hospital up until present time as a sort of therapy. And I can share what I learned with mommies to be. This whole experience has been the hardest and most trying in my life, both physically and emotionally. Who knows how long this is going to take, probably a couple of days (or weeks) of 5 min here and there of typing. And it probably won’t be coherent since I’m so tired, but I want to do it. So here it is, uncensored, candid, and graphic, so this one may not be one for the faint of heart or the kiddies =P.

I was overdue and started to freak out because my OB was out on vacation but there were other OBs covering. My OB was pretty sure that I’d deliver on time while she was still in, so when she was gone, I was thinking…ok, am I going to get induced or what? What happens if he never comes out? Luckily, the next day after calling the OB that was covering (who said that she’d be happy to deliver if he popped out on her watch, but couldn’t do anything when her watch was over and then the next OB would fill in) my water broke at about 7 am on New Year’s Eve. This happened after a couple of days of walking, drinking spicy V8, and eating Hubby’s spicy ma po tofu. I was getting more uncomfortable. I actually dreaded going to sleep at night because I was so big and it was hard to get a good night sleep. Even just getting settled into bed was an ordeal. I woke up to go to the bathroom like I had almost every day for 9 months and I felt the gush of fluid that looked straw colored. I couldn’t believe it! 5 days overdue and it was actually happening! I gasped in disbelief and joy. It was starting! I woke up Hubby and he was stunned and half asleep…”no sh*t!” My disbelief and happiness quickly turned into worry when I saw that the amniotic fluid had meconium in it, which is bad because if the baby swallows large amounts of it, it could lead to distress. (I’m going to use some medical terms. Sorry for not giving the definitions.) Here’s lesson #1 that I learned: do not watch those shows like Birth Day where they show babies in distress because it just freaks you out (which our childbirth prep class instructor also said not to do too). Meconium was featured on one of the episodes and that’s what I was freaking out, but all was fine at the end. More on the meconium later. I took a quick shower while Hubby gathered my bag and all our things and we calmly, but giddily drove to the hospital. I ate a granola bar and had some water on the way because I knew that’d be my last meal for awhile.

When we got to the hospital at about 8 am we just walked right into the nurses’ station at El Camino Hospital. My labor and delivery (l&d) nurse, who was really nice and we like a lot, showed me to our birthing room and gave me a gown to change in and all the supplies I’d need like pads and stuff. Shortly, my Mom showed up since we had contacted our families that it was time. Although I told her it could take hours before the delivery, she wanted to be there. Lesson #2: You may think that you want just your Hubby in the delivery room, but having your Mom there is actually comforting. Although she was hovering over me a lot of the time, it was nice that she was there with me. More on this later. The nurse started and IV and started the Pitocin to get the contractions started, so I guess technically I was induced since the labor was sped up. I was hooked up to monitors and it was fun to watch all the contractions happen. Pretty soon, I was dilating even more and it was getting more and more painful, but definitely bearable. At this time, Hubby and I were really excited and giddy. We were joking and having fun and Hubby was snapping pics. We also noticed that Braham’s Lullaby would play over the loudspeakers from time to time. We asked the nurse why and she said that it plays throughout the hospital every time a baby is delivered to symbolize new life and happiness. I can just picture a nurse slapping a “lullaby button” every time a kid pops out. Meanwhile, I was doing my breathing and Hubby was giving me massages to get through the contractions that were getting stronger. At about 10:30, the nurse said “you know, you don’t have to go through this (the pain)” since I had very early on told her that the epidural was no longer my backup plan…it was the plan. =P. She said that the anesthesiologist was available now, or else I’d have to wait another hour because he was going to do a c-section. I chose not to wait and got the epidural and immediately felt a lot better. I didn’t see the epidural needle, although I saw plenty by watching all of those birth shows. And no, the needle did not hurt since they numb the area first. It wasn’t that big of a deal. I didn’t feel the contractions at all right after. But this meant that I could no longer get up out of bed to go to the bathroom, so they put a catheter in me. What a weird feeling to not have to go to pee! Good thing I didn’t wait to get the epidural because in no time I was in more pain and I got a higher dose once the anesthesiologist was free. Later, the pain got worse and we were considering a higher dose, but my blood pressure was too low for it. From that time to about 4:00, the contractions got stronger and stronger, I started dilating and progressing more and more, and it continued to get painful. So, no…an epidural does not get rid of all the pain and you feel the pressure of the contractions still. During this stretch of time, which was kinda of a blur to me, the nurse kept trying to put an internal monitor on the baby’s forehead, which kept on slipping off because he had so much hair. Our first indication of what he looked like! There was also an incident where the baby’s heartbeat decreased, which was and indication to stop increasing the pain medication and decrease the pitocin. I was given oxygen, which was probably the best I felt during the whole thing, maybe because the oxygen was so distracting. But baby was fine after a bit and everything was back to normal and they stopped the oxygen. It may have been just a glitch with the monitors according to the nurse. I had asked the nurse about the meconium and she just said nonchalantly, “The pediatrician will just make sure that the baby didn’t swallow a lot of it. Don’t worry.” I don’t know if she said that so that I wouldn’t worry, or if it really such a big deal. During this stretch of time, I also felt the need to go poop and the nurse said “that’s what we want to hear.” Little did I know that that feeling was actually the baby going down the birth canal and putting pressure on that area. Then finally, I was ready to push at 4:00. Sad thing was there was a nurse shift change and my nurse had to go. She was so kind and nice, and I learned lesson #3: your experience depends on what kind of nurse you have. L&D nurse, maternity nurse that looks after you, the baby’s nurse, and NICU nurse. Some are more compassionate then others and just give you a better vibe. My second l&d nurse wasn’t as nice as the first.

The contractions were coming fast and hard and they turned down the pain med so that I can feel the pressure in order to push. Lesson #4: the pain during the final stretch of labor wasn’t the pain of a contracting uterus, but it was the pain of all the pressure of the baby coming down the birth canal. Like having to go poop, but wayyyyyyy worse. All that pressure on that area got so intense with each contraction. It wasn’t a sharp pain, but a constant strong pain. The nurse had me push through every contraction, which was tiring and tough. My mom was still there and she had asked me if I wanted her to stay. I said yes, especially since I didn’t want her to be deprived of the experience of seeing her first grandchild being born. At first I said just wait in the back and watch. But when the contractions got more intense, she dug in and held one of my legs while Hubby held the other as I pushed with the nurse coaching me. She kept saying, push so the head turns and I didn’t know what that really meant. I had actually pushed so much that the nurse said that the baby had a lot of hair! She asked Hubby if he wanted to see and he said no since he’s not too good with blood. Ok, I'll be honest. I did poop during pushing. How can you not with all that pressure in that area and the fact that you have diarrhea during the last days of pregnancy! After 1.5 hours of pushing, I was completely exhausted and in a lot of pain. Even grunting though the contractions. I was also shaking, which is normal during delivery. The progress I’d made wasn’t good enough and the OB came in to do an ultrasound. She found that the baby’s head was faced up instead of down, which is not impossible, but difficult to deliver vaginally. She said that I could be pushing for another 2 hours and wouldn’t make a difference, so she recommended a c-section. Lesson #5: Medical professionals like to wait to for things to resolve themselves naturally, and then intervene if things don’t work out. The OB probably could have done the ultrasound earlier, but the nurse wanted me to turn the baby before turning to the last resort. This lesson comes again when Max’s jaundice kicked in. At this point, I was so ready to deliver whichever way so I agreed with the c-section. Then things happened really quickly. A whole team came in to prep me for surgery. I was given a nasty tasting liquid antacid, which the nurse said to take like a shot. I asked if I can have chaser then, but she didn’t get my humor, I guess. Another nurse came into the room, N, which happened to be an acquaintance from high school that I hadn’t seen since high school. She whisked me away and wheeled me from the l&d room to the operating room as and prepped me for surgery. We chit chatted a bit too. “Where do you live? In SV. Oh me too. How many kids to do you have? I didn’t see you at the high school reunion?” It was nice to have another familiar face there and the chatter took my mind off the pain, which was still very present. During this time, Hubby was given scrubs to wear and he was waiting for me outside while I was getting prepped. I can’t imagine what was going through his mind, especially since it was all happening so fast and he’s not too fond of blood. Before I knew it, Hubby was next to me, they put the curtain up between us and my tummy, the anesthesiologist upped my pain meds, and the OB started the surgery. Lesson #6: A c-section is major surgery. When you hear that someone had a c-section, you don’t really think it’s that serious because it’s so common. But for someone who’s never been in a hospital like me, it was kind overwhelming. I was shaking so hard at that point that my upper body was numb. I asked the anesthesiologist if it was a side effect of the pain meds, and he said no. It’s probably because of stress. So my lower body had no feeling, my upper body was numb from the shaking, and the only part of my body that was not numb was my head. Hubby held my hand the entire time and supported me, and of course he wasn’t going to peak over the curtain. It was New Year’s Eve, so the OBs and nurses were kinda of chit chatting, which I thought was kinda funny. Everyone chit chats at work, no matter what the environment, I guess. I couldn’t really feel much except for maybe some pressure. I could smell something burning though, and I realized it was my flesh (which is when I realized that c-section is major surgery). They got to the baby pretty quickly and the first thing I heard the OB jokingly say was “Oh my gosh. His head looks it's 10 pounds!” I thought…”WHAT!!!???” I was thinking that the baby would be 7 – 8 lbs, especially since usually the baby’s weight is similar to the mom’s birth weight and I was 6 lbs 9 oz. All I could think was, “Oh my, I have big baby!???” Then it happened. He was delivered at 6:48 pm and Max cried for the first time. I immediately started crying when I heard his cry and Hubby almost lost it too. I didn’t get to see him immediately; probably because he was whisked away due to the meconium (Max had an apgar score of 9, which was very good). But Hubby saw him and he was describing him to me. And N came over to my head and said, “J, you did good. He’s handsome!” And then I heard a nurse say “9lbs 4 oz.” After a couple of minutes, they were done cleaning him off and a nurse brought him over. When I saw him, I was overjoyed. And yes, he was shockingly big! I couldn’t believe that that size baby was in me that whole time. Then they whisked Max away to the nursery to get evaluated and settled. They asked Hubby to go with Max, but Hubby stayed with me instead. I asked him later why and he said that he thought I needed him more than Max did. (Awe!) So they finished wrapping up the surgery by delivering the placenta and stitching me up. I could hear the stapler that was stapling my incision together. The OBs kept counting to 10 several times and later I realized that they maybe were counting the staples, probably to make sure that one wasn’t missing. I thanked the surgical team and then the curtain was brought down and everyone had left except N and another nurse, who rolled me on to a gurney and wheeled me into the recovery room where they monitored my vital signs. The actual surgery maybe took 1 hour. Lesson #7: Be flexible. I don’t feel empty or that I was robbed of a natural childbirth, which a lot of mothers that had emergency c-sections feel. I’m just glad that Max was healthy and doing well. And I did go through labor, just not a vaginal birth. Which is probably the worse scenario. And Max had a cone head to prove it! But whatevers was my attitude. I do wish that I could have seen him right after he was delivered (probably the meconium prevented that) and seen the placenta out of curiosity. Maybe next time I’ll request that as part of my birth plan. I hear that El Camino doesn’t do Vaginal Birth After Cesarean (VBAC). But as K said, which now I can totally relate to, why go through a VBAC and experience all that labor pain?

While I was in the recovery room, I was kinda of out of it. I was happy, but a big groggy. I was alone because my mom and Hubby went to go see Max. The nurses hooked me up to some monitors and put these compression cuffs on my calves that filled with air almost every minute to promote circulation. They were connected to a pump on my bed and I wore these for two days. I felt like Uma Thurman in Kill Bill, because I could slowly move my toes and regained feeling. But I was still so numb that I had no idea these cuffs were on me. All of a sudden, a nurse brought over Max and I held him for the first time. And the nurse said you want to learn how to nurse? She taught me how to breastfeed, which was slow going and awkward. But it was good bonding time with my new son and I was surprised that it happened so soon. My mom came and then Hubby and my in laws, so I wasn’t alone anymore. They then whisked Max away again for his first bath, and I was all alone again since everyone followed Max. But I needed to just recover from the whole ordeal anyways. My Mom stating calling family members with the news and my grandma, who was a nurse and helped deliver lots of babies, congratulated me on the phone and told me how much admiration she had for me for going through the hardship of delivering a 9 pounder. She knew from experience since my uncle was over 9 lbs too. At this point, I was dying for a drink since I hadn’t had one in so long, but I was only allowed to have ice chips since my digestive system was recovering too. I drank the few ice chips that melted and had maybe two sips, which felt so good. Then, a whole team of nurses wheeled me out of the recovery room and into my maternity room and transferred me to the maternity bed, which I’d spend the next 4 days in. Luckily I was given a private room and it was one of the biggest rooms in the maternity ward, so Hubby was allowed to spend the night, which he did every night.

Ok, I guess that covers labor and delivery. I think this will have to be a 3 part entry – part 2 will be recovery and part 3 will be bringing home baby.

Introducing...Maxwell!

2008-01-09T14:15:00.001-08:00

In case word hasn't gotten to you yet... Sorry to keep you in suspense!

Maxwell finally arrived on December 31 at 6:48 PM. He was a whopping 9 lbs 4 oz and 21 inches at birth! After recuperating from an unplanned C-section and a bout of jaundice, Mommy and baby are finally at home together and doing great. Daddy is elated! Thank you for all of your support and well wishes. Sorry to keep you in suspense by missing phone calls and not replying to e-mails. We were scheduled to be released on Jan 4, but Max's jaundice kicked in on day 3 and he had to be transferred to the NICU on the 4th, where he stayed until the 6th. It was quite an ordeal to go through recovery and then having Max taken to the NICU, but we're all happy to be home now and trying to catch up on some sleep!

When I have some free time, I'll share my experience at the hospital, but who knows when that'll be!

Due Date + 1

2007-12-27T17:01:00.000-08:00

Well, no worries of baby coming on Christmas. It’s one day past the due date and Junior is still not here! Who’d want to leave a comfy womb anyway? heh. I’m okay with him being late. I just hope now that he’s not too late. Please, before Jan 1, so that we can get the tax deduction (hey, I am an Accountant). I’m soooo big now, waddling and leaning back so that I don’t fall forward! It’s just an overall uncomfortable feeling, but still bearable. I’ve been have a few contractions here and there, but nothing regular yet. We had an appt on Monday and the doc said that he (we saw the father again) thought it should be this week. In fact, I think he was so sure that he didn’t talk what happens if the baby will be over a week late because neither doc will be working next week (there are back up docs that are covering for them). So if I’m really late, I don’t know if I’ll be induced or not, but no mention of that yet. My next appt if nothing happens is Jan 7. Sheesh!

I’ve been passing the time by catching up on DVDs and TV. I’ve been also doing more baby preparation tasks here and there, but I’m pretty much done with that now. So I’m just passing the time by taking naps everyday, such a luxury! And answering phone calls because everyone is calling for status updates. To break the monotony, Hubby took me to see the movie Juno yesterday, which was nice. I avoided going to the theater during the pregnancy because the decibel level is too high, but I figured that Juno wouldn’t have any car crashes or explosions, heh. The movie was really good and of course we could relate because its about pregnancy.

The Waiting Game

2007-12-17T10:48:00.000-08:00

As of last week, I'm 1.5 cm dilated! It's starting!!! The doc couldn't give us a better estimate of when Junior is going to come. Her exact words were "I don't have crystal ball." Thanks Lady! But she did say there's a possibility that he'll come before Christmas, which means that we won't have the birthday on Christmas dilemma. I'm surprised that my doc hasn't suggested an ultrasound. I guess she's either pretty old fashion or doesn't believe in doing an ultrasound when there's really no need for one. She just measures my belly to see if I'm at a good size. She said that ultrasounds could be inaccurate when determining the size of the baby at this stage. It could be up to two pounds off.

I think the waiting is going to make me crazy! I'm the kind of person who likes to know what's happening and when, so something like this just happening out of the blue doesn't really sit with me well. I want to keep myself busy, but at this point I think I should just take it easy. Today is my first day of maternity leave and I was pretty busy at work until the very end. I didn't plan it that way, but delays out of my control and a new boss kinda screwed up my plans. The last two days I was so distracted and tired that I couldn't concentrate or even make coherent sentences. I'm so happy that I don't have to work again for another 4 months! Well, I'll still be working. Just not the same type. =P

Hubby decided to sell the Wii because he was able to make a profit. So we got a PS3 and Rock Band! I'm going to play all I can before baby arrives! I'm also crossing off other things on my list to do for myself before Junior comes, like going out to dinner with Hubby and indulging in some chocolate since I'll be eliminating it when I breastfeed. I told Hubby that I'm on vacation until baby comes. =P

Thanks very much, but who are you?

2007-12-10T03:55:00.000-08:00

It's been great receiving gifts from our registry in the mail, but some of these gifts don't have a gift message or sender information. Whom ever got us the high chair, thanks very much!!! Hubby and I appreciate your generosity! But who are you???

9 Months!

2007-11-30T14:22:00.000-08:00

We've hit the 9^th month mark! Holy Cow! We’ll learn how the baby is lying during our next appointment in a couple of days, which is really exciting but kind of makes me nervous. I hope he’s head down by now. He squirms around a lot and it feels like my whole abdomen is making waves sometimes. It’s very weird to see the movements and wondering if it’s an elbow or a foot sticking out. Sometimes baby will be pushing out and something will stick out, and Hubby will feel for it and push inwards while neither of them fully realize that I’m in the middle and it hurts =P

I spent most of Thanksgiving break to prepare for baby. I had planned taking the entire week off since March, but I had so much work to do before taking maternity leave, I was lucky to have just 4 days free of work. I spent most of the time washing everything related to baby that we’ve accumulated so far in fragrance and dye free detergent. We also put some other things together like the swing and organized the nursery a bit. This weekend we’ll have our big shopping trip where we’ll get all the little stuff, so I’m making a game plan for our raid of Babies R Us, which will start right when the store opens.

So, after I read Fast Food Nation, burgers grossed me out and I didn’t eat one for a whole year. After that year passed, I maybe had a burger once or twice a year. This went on for 5 years. Then when I became preggers, the cravings started and I craved hamburgers the most. Probably because I was deprived of burgers for so long and the garden burgers and chicken sandwiches didn’t cut it anymore as substitutes. Maybe Junior was influencing my cravings too =P. So now that I won’t be pregnant much longer, I though I’d take look back and rate all the burgers I had since it was a personal quest for me to find the best burger. Not to mention fries, my favorite food.

From best to worst:

Red Robin – Saratoga

This is where I satisfied my first burger craving, and satisfy it did! Nice and juicy and how can you beat bottomless fries? I don’t use their seasoning though because it’s too salty. I’ve been there three times since I’ve been pregnant, but I had a garden burger one of those times because I felt guilty. It was so hard not to order a burger though.

Dairy Belle – Sunnyvale

I’ve been having Dairy Belle ever since I was little and we lived a few blocks away from it. The tradition continued when we moved and I went to the Dairy Belle in downtown Los Altos. Whenever my bro would come home to visit, we’d make a stop there, since he loves burgers too. It’s a fast food joint, but the burgers have fresh ingredients and fries are yummy. The seasoning on the burger itself is really good. Plus, you don’t have to pay $6 for a burger here. The soft serve is good too, but after getting a burger and fries, getting dessert makes me feel too guilty. We used to go to DB just for a dipped cone or the riptide. Mmmmm…

S’s House – Merced

S was kind enough to make his famous steak burgers because he knew of my special craving. Hubby had two of them! Yummy! Backyard grilled burgers are so good and the personal touch made it really good. And M was kind enough to bake fries using J’s recipe. Yummy! Probably the healthiest burger and fries I’ve ever had.

Kirk’s Steakburgers – San Jose

Steakburgers chargrilled with fixin’s bar, a lot like Clark’s except with steak. I’d say this place ranks the same as Clarke’s (below) but the choice of getting fries/onion rings together makes it a bit better.

Clarke’s – Mountain View

This is where I went to satisfy my second craving. I really wanted a charcoal grilled burger, and the burgers here satisfied that very well. Nice and juicy again with a condiment bar. The fries are just ok though. I’d like this place better if the people behind the counter were nicer and the prices weren’t so high. Their burgers are actually $6 and up and the place isn’t even as nice as a Carl’s Jr. =/

Marie Calendar’s – Cupertino

I was craving their Frisco Burger (I think that’s what it’s called). I hadn’t had it since I was maybe in high school. The buns are made of grilled parmesan bread and the sauce is 1000 island dressing. Really good! The fries are ok. We started going to MC’s more frequently with my family afterwards because they give corn bread now with your meal and the salad bar is pretty good with lots of variety. But I never ordered a slice of pie for dessert. Again, felt too guilty.

BJ’s - Cupertino

They have the same burger as MC. Maybe even better. But no corn bread or salad bar =P. Fries are better though, seasoned and thick.

In and Out – Sunnyvale

If you’ve read Fast Food Nation, then you know that In and Out is one of the cleanest and safest fast food chains, which is reassuring. The burgers are good and the dressing give it a unique taste. But I not a fan of their fries (but of course I’ll have them =P).

Santa Cruz Beach Boardwalk

Burgers was one of the choices offered during our company picnic, so of course I ate one. Sometimes a backyard grilled burger just tastes so good. No fries at the picnic though =(

Los Gatos Brewery

My coworkers said that they had really good burgers. The burger was ok. The seasoning on the burger was really salty though and it made it dry. The fries weren’t anything special. Good thing work paid for my $12 lunch =P

Wendy’s - Sunnyvale

Don’t ask me why, but the combination of a Wendy’s burger, fries, and frostee just sounded so good during early pregnancy. It sounded good, but I probably will never get another Wendy’s burger. Blah! But the frostee was still good =)

Classic Burgers – Los Gatos

I went to check out this fast food joint near work after reading an article about it. This was absolutely the worst burger I ever had. The meat had no taste, the lettuce and other ingredients weren’t fresh, and worst fries ever. I’d go to Mc D’s over this place. Really disappointing since I swore that it would be my last burger of my pregnancy before going there. =(

On another note, I miss Bistro Burger in SF. I never had a beef burger there though, although I’d bet they’re good. I always ordered a garden burger with my frings (order of fries and onion rings, love it!). I also had a craving for Firestones in SLO for the longest time but looks like I won’t get to satisfy that craving. And to satisfy my craving without leaving the house, I had some bocca burgers, which is a close substitute for the real thing. I finally learned that gardenburgers are made from veggies and grains while bocca burgers are made from soy.

If you haven’t gone to www.jatbar.com, they have good reviews of restaurants all around the bay area, which inspired this blog entry.

Ok, after reading this, I feel a little grossed out since I just realized that I ate so many burgers =/. No more beef burgers for me! It’s back to chicken breast sandwiches or veggie burgers on wheat buns! Funny thing is that Hubby and I watched Fast Food Nation the movie a months ago and it didn't deter me from eating burgers =( I think I'll read the book again.

34 Weeks

2007-11-18T22:05:00.000-08:00

So I asked my doc what the likelyhood is that Junior will be here early, and all she said is, "All I can tell you is that full term is 37 - 41 weeks." =( Thanks a lot! I'll be at 35 weeks on Tuesday, which means that Junior could come in just 3 weeks. Yikes!

So I've seen three specialists during my pregnancy and none of them really helped. I saw a physical therapist in the beginning because I had back pain even before I was preggers. I new foam topper for our bed fixed that and I stopped my appointments after my self-fix. I saw the ophthalmologist when I had that broken blood vessel in my eye. He gave me eye drops and sent me on my way, which I only used twice. And earlier this week I saw a dermatologist for my rashes (yes, I got stretch marks and they itch like crazy! Not like I ever bare my belly, so the stretch marks don't really bother me Rashes are common in pregnancy though.) But the rashes went away and all the dermatologist said that the rashes were some sort of reaction to fragrance in detergent, which couldn't be the case because I didn't use any new soaps. Our instructor said in our childbirth prep class said today that in places like the bay area, there are a ton of specialists, which actually decreases the level of care. There should me more family practitioners, which is why health care is better in smaller areas. Interesting...

On another note, I have a strange desire to cook Thanksgiving dinner from scratch this year. Last year we hosted and we bought a premade turkey, but I made sides =D That counts for something, right? But this year, I want to roast a turkey and watching food network just makes me want to cook everything. But we may have hot pot with Hubby's family, so no traditional Thanksgiving feast for us =(